Is cheating on your partner normal? Why are people so promiscous?

Devotion, compassion, commitment, these are the qualities of my partner. I hope you find the same in your's op.

I've been confronted by very attractive women and they have tried to flirt with me but I let them know that my intentions in life are not that of a lust searcher or entertainer seeker. Sex only seems intriguing to me when i think of it as love making. I wouldn't say my ex girlfriend isn't valuable, I would say that her morals and perception in life are warped by her physical reality.

Yes i live in the physical and have sexual urges, but I don't let them control my emotions and feelings. I stay loyal till the end. That is how I feel.

Then thats all you need op.

Stay loyal, and true!
Asking a community of mostly idiots, will only make you question your own good morals.

Your thread should read:
I'm better than you and here is why:

I've been confronted by very attractive women and they have tried to flirt with me but I let them know that my intentions in life are not that of a lust searcher or entertainer seeker. Sex only seems intriguing to me when i think of it as love making. I wouldn't say my ex girlfriend isn't valuable, I would say that her morals and perception in life are warped by her physical reality.

Yes i live in the physical and have sexual urges, but I don't let them control my emotions and feelings. I stay loyal till the end. That is how I feel.

The problem is people are false and carry on an image of what they want people to think they are.

If a relationship starts and this mask isn't removed or understood, they are getting involved in a problem just waiting to happen.

If you WANT monogamy, get married. If you want to fuck different people, don't get married.

But DO NOT pretend to be monogamous when you are really not up for it.

btw, recently researchers found DNA in womens brain that was of their sexual partners. Men do not have this, no female DNA in male brains.

If your GF or Wife cheated and took it raw, she has that dudes DNA in her brain for life.

Thanks for the wisdom. I'm doing some soul searching right now trying to figure out what love is and why i feel so bonded to people, but still patient at the same time. I say to myself that I'm weak and that I should be like others, but i find myself thinking otherwise at times.

I think you understand my side of this topic, I stand behind all the things you mentioned. My mentality is of a one person till death thing, but i don't want it to be my downfall either. I usually devote an eternal percent of myself to my lover, but I always get ditched over reasons such as sex, attraction, or other excuses such as being too joyful and such. But thanks. i feel that others don't see beyond the physical...All i want is peace and some sort of reason to getting myself into another relationship...

I'm tired of wasting my time and I'm definitely not going around to have sex only to come home to nothing. Not my intentions.

You see, our DNA is 98% shared with apes, and when they are horny, look what they do, google it up and You won't be surprised about cheatings over a partner anymore.

do you have a link to any further info on your above post?

I'm thinking...looking back on all your questions that you probably had a bad childhood/raped or something....and dont know what its like to really be inlove....not platonic...I mean fully completely in love AND lust which is a natural part of the inlove process. This anti sex thing makes me think perhaps you could be asexual or gay...or just not found a man that has the pheromones AND freedom or just didnt fancy you back. Dont confuse that with it not being real. MOST people never find it....but that doesnt make it not real. As I said...most people amazingly lucky if they find THE ONE before they get to settling age. If you stay faithful to the settling person....good for you I guess...but you could be missing out on THE ONE. Timing is...everything and very sadly off in most cases.

In that vein, I have spent years 'training' my wife, and she; me. We know what makes the other tick, likes, dislikes, all the cumulative experiences of learning one another. In the end, that makes the sex mind blowingly good and satisfying.

A one night stand would be -meh-, mutual masterbation at best. So why bother and risk betraying the one who I've spent years with? Now if it's a third party and we've both agreed in bringing another into the bedroom for fun, I'd be OK with that. Just no secrets.

You seem to be searching for an answer to a question to which there are many. You'll need to find the one that fits your situation.

LOL

Well dump her then...

Stop wasting her time. Thats pretty low.

Ah...so you are a guy. All I can say is.....people go off people that break their heart. My husband broke mine...I broke his. You gave your girl the world...but she probably wasnt inlove with you ...you were the settling guy. You nor she did anything wrong....sometimes we date and like enough to settle...sometimes we dont know until after the fact that it wasnt THE NOTEBOOK type of love (which if you watched you would realise that they didnt get it right for a while either).

And women feel rejected and overlooked if a mans lust isnt there for her. She didnt want theworld...she wanted you to show you love and creativity FOR HER. No wonder she went elsewjere because it would seem you dont like sex much....to her that would mean you dont like her much. Loyalty is nothing...if not worshipping each others skin, souls, bodies, and hearts. I dont know what you think giving someone your world is....but its not just being faithful....its being made to feel that you are the most inspring, loving and gorgeous person...that includes sex. If you dont care for it much.....you arent giving your world...or that world is pretty sterile.

I wanted to make love to her, don't say things without knowing. I turned her on and such. But her intentions were obviously elsewhere. I'm not mad at her, just confused about relationships in general. Is it worth it, but at the same time is life worth living alone.. I'm very confused.

I want to be with one person, but I don't want them wasting their time with me. I left her already, but it left me wondering what's the purpose of it all. Life can't just be about sex..

The real reason is that people are lazy, lonely, scared and spiritually bankrupt.

So, they will settle for the first person they have a "connection" with and not spend any energy discerning what sort of long-term prospects are really at stake.

so true.

so true.

Its all fine and dandy to think that cheaters are the scum of the Earth until one day you are put in that situation.

My Husband pays no attention to me. We have no sex. He much rather touch his ipad than me. I have to live up to this typical role of housewife, even though I work and bring in money. He doesnt try to make me happy even when I ask. I asked for counselling, which was ignored.

He is not a bad guy. He is just so very thoughtless. We have 3 beautiful children and I dont want to hurt anyone.

Before anyone thinks that I should try harder. I have. For 10 years. Trying to maintain that spark on your own and you will see how hard it is. He is just so absent.

I havent had sex outside the marriage but I found a person who I connect with. I struggle with this everyday.

I married my husband because he gave me an STI and I didnt ever want to tell anyone so I thought it was the safest route. I do not know I would of married him otherwise. I told the other person about this and he is fine with it. He also said he will wait forever.

We are catholic and work within the catholic confines, which means even if I had the guts to completely ruin our lives over my unhappiness, I would lose my job and our friends.

I am miserable.

Plenty of women are not like that. But it depends on the guy too, and it depends on whether the guy is smart/mature enough to even get a good woman.

I'm sorry to hear that. If your husband isn't treating you with respect then he's honestly probably doing things with someone else or is investing his time in other things. The fact is monogamy is very confusing. You have to analyze the other individual before you get into a relationship them. Some people just dont have the chops in keeping a spiritual connection with their partness. It's the ego, the sexual drive, the search for lust and endless connection that destroys us.

There are those who say that relationships are unnormal and that people should just sleep around and have more then one partner, but I disagree. I don't want life to be this way, time is too precious. What is living worth if you have to go back and forth from person to person to try to find what your looking for.

This is my advice to you and to myself, keep looking until you've absolutely know that the person is sincere, honest, loving, patient, understanding, not superficial, full of sexual tendencies but can control them, and let you know if things aren't working. This life seems sometimes very hard because no one ever seems to be happy or fulfilled, we just have to keep hoping. There is reason out there...and maybe love too..

Thank you. But I don't know what I think about relationships anymore.

There are two categories of outside interest: physical and emotional. Physical is self explanatory, but for peeps that are too conditioned with social influence, its looking for attention, acknowledgment, romance, and affection. Emotional type is having someone talk, listen, share, sympathize, and support.

You can scream that you hate people who cheat, but you do it all the time...you just choose not to look at it that way. How do you feel if someone says you look good, smell great, or pays attention to some little detail of your existence? If you are normal you feel great. How about when/if they flirt a little with you? Your confidence soars and your behavior patterns will change temporarily. Guess what, you are emotionally cheating! Men and women experience this all the time with coworkers, coaches, trainers, store clerks...all kinds of interactions. I makes you feel noticed and important, even if it is only for 5 seconds.

Physical is SIMPLY that some people, both men and women, require it. Its how their body chemistry is made up. Not everyone is a clone and operates the same way. You may be able to go a week but your partner may need it every day. Simple as that.

So what do we have today in the world of a legal contract called marriage? We have one or both partners getting COMFORTABLE. This is defined by not talking much about emtional needs or physical needs. Men/Women that have needs are drawn to porn if partner does not need it much. Men/Women take a kid out to a class or practice and find a person that meets the emtional needs. Then there are the few that dont require either and are happy where they are (minority). We are not built by law, rather as another person stated, we are 98% monkey. Its natural no matter how unnatural society (law/religion) tries to make it.

I liken it to a person being in a desert for a year or fifteen years...then happens upon a glass of water. This water pays attention to you, compliments you, wants to be with you, talks, listens and actively supports your life. What do you do? If you hate cheaters, then you bypass it cause your COMFORTABLE with you misery and cant see beyond your containment (law/religion/personal belief). Most will consume the water like a savage beast! What is the person giving up at that point? You may need to look at yourself hard. Are you available and actively pursuing your partner daily to keep the challenge and interest? Do you fall in love with this person EVERY day? Loyalty is admiral but is it really attracting your partner to you? Just some thoughts :)

Then what do you recommend? What do you think a relationship is about or do you even believe in that?

If you cheat on the person your with then you really don't love that person. You don't hurt the one you love on purpose even if theres no chance of being caught you can't hide that shit.

If your someone who cheats then you should just be single and fuck whoever you want. You shouldn't commit yourself to another person if your not ready to be 100% faithful.

Now theres always varying degrees of situations. Like some poor guy might be married 5 years and has not had sex in the last 4 years... This man, in my opinion, should be able to cheat without repercussion. Because in reality its not him who cheated its the sexless wife who cheated him of his physical needs/desires. She had ample opportunity to tend to those needs and when she doesn't, its at the point she loses rights to his cock, and right to control where he sticks it.

Every situation is different. When the women bends over backwards for the man in a relationship with sex and cooking, and he still cheats... Thats not right.. He should lose everything to her in a divorce. And he is the pig and social stigma we hear about every time women claim men are pigs its this type of man they are talking about, not all of us...

different strokes for different folks, maybe its normal to be promiscous? and all that one partner for life stuff is just bullshit morality that we try to superimpose over human nature? also maybe you just got lucky, i gave it my all three times but im broke and single and not likely to try it again, long as your happy and not hurting anybody why does it matter?

And brainwashed.

Just this past week I found out that this friend who is always telling me oh I love my wife, oh she's the greatest, blah,blah,blah was caught banging out this chic at work. To me that guy just lost all my respect, why the hell do people even get married anymore I wonder. My wife is very lucky, I am only interested in her and I could care less about other women.

Statistically faithfulness is the norm but not by much. Sex is the most tempting replacement for internal fulfillment. It's the number one drug so to speak. It's a drug that looks more important than normal drugs because it gives the illusion that other people care about you. But they don't.

Hi My Canadian friend!

Knowing a small bit of your life here on GLP, I a SURE you have more to add than just that.

Come on, let's hear it! Haven't you had some success working out (or coming to terms with, maybe) a relationship that needed some care?