CONTEST! Now Closed, Voting poll now open! (Click to find link) | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 31781644 United States 03/02/2013 06:27 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Tanos User ID: 28279124 Spain 03/02/2013 06:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Dr. Acula Hey bouncing elephant, I would totally bite... but i already did on the 26th but if somebody can help raise you i will offer my green support to them Thanks to Dickie A Friend Rabbit (who I can't find on the who's on list) I now have 100. So now you can add another runner up prize to your list. Just PM me when you have made your choice. many thanks for contributing to this!! My pleasure. I remember Well all the hard work you put into making the santa hats for all-comers over the Christmas period. And from other posts of yours. A truly unselfish person. I like that. Very likeable as well. I would like to upgrade more people myself, but I am currently sustaining about half a dozen other members, and times are hard at the mo. Anyway, one thing you could do for me,..you could view and rate my video in my sig line and maybe leave a comment...that is...if you like it..if you don't like it, then don't leave a comment...LoL. Big fan of the video! Top notch! The unexamined life is not worth living |
Dr. Acula (OP) Senior Forum Moderator User ID: 57407 United States 03/02/2013 06:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Dr. Acula Hey bouncing elephant, I would totally bite... but i already did on the 26th but if somebody can help raise you i will offer my green support to them Thanks to Dickie A Friend Rabbit (who I can't find on the who's on list) I now have 100. So now you can add another runner up prize to your list. Just PM me when you have made your choice. many thanks for contributing to this!! My pleasure. I remember Well all the hard work you put into making the santa hats for all-comers over the Christmas period. And from other posts of yours. A truly unselfish person. I like that. Very likeable as well. I would like to upgrade more people myself, but I am currently sustaining about half a dozen other members, and times are hard at the mo. Anyway, one thing you could do for me,..you could view and rate my video in my sig line and maybe leave a comment...that is...if you like it..if you don't like it, then don't leave a comment...LoL. your words humble me, thank you. I will most certainly check out your video later tonight :) _______________________ |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 20566260 United States 03/02/2013 06:53 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1408355 Australia 03/02/2013 07:17 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The incessant ringing of the phone woke me at 9:06am. It was my uncle Frankie. He yelled "TELEPHONE POLES WILL BE DAMAGED!" like always. I half laughed and hung up on him. Quoting: Antediluvian Lit up a Morley and went out to check on my tomato plants. Looked like there was a storm comin' in so I decided to take them inside. Mailman came by as I was doing that and gave me a package. Inside was the new Fandango Rangers CD, Brokeback Rangers: Liberace Re-imagined. I was about to throw it in the player when I saw a movement out in the yard. It was the neighbor kid going BEZERK! I went out to him but the only thing I could get out of him was "The two witnesses are coming! The two witnesses are coming!". Took a drag from the Morley and just shook my head. Crazy kid. I turned to go back inside and noticed my other neighbor had put up a new flag. It was yellow with the letters B.S. I laughed. He was certainly full of it. He was always babbling about Zetas or the Galactic Federation or something but I never paid any attention. Went back inside and checked my email. Saw newsletters from the Real John Lear and John Titor. I'd read them later. Had to check the World At War thread on GLP first. Knocking interrupted me. It was the father of the crazy kid. "Sorry about Damian. He's really been affected by the chem-trails lately." "It's ok," I said, "life is like a box of chocolates. Empty and filled with brown paper wrappers." I shut the door, turned on the radio and put it on my favorite channel. UVB-76. I sat down, put out the Morley, and smiled. Time for a nap. Liked this story. |
Shoot straight Johnny User ID: 27147914 United Kingdom 03/02/2013 07:21 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Last Edited by Brit Perspective on 03/03/2013 02:05 AM The chariots of God are tens of thousands, and thousands of thousands. |
Cassie :-) User ID: 10262276 United States 03/02/2013 07:26 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Being a huge fan of GLP and also a tomato farmer in the rural SW of Alberta has been a difficult journey... Long nights have I spent bringing in all 12212012 plants in an attempt to avert disaster, having to replant them the following day. EAT has been a main contributor to my increasing paranoia and my brian has since become completely unhinged, frequently finding myself huddled naked in a corner... Quoting: CalmShock My family is very worried about my condition. I get calls from them frequently and although I appreciate their efforts, I do believe it only makes my situation worse... Especially when my uncle calls... I feel like a complete moran putting all this out there, but my therapist BRIEF says I need to acknowledge my fears. Then blow them up... Most of our sessions end with me huddled naked in the corner again due to my (as described by him "irrational") fear of explosions. .... brb... *gets dressed* Aside from some minor personality setbacks, I'm a really nice guy. Currently single with a healthy supply of preps for two, I'm a well organized individual with a love for travel. My 11 bug-out-bags are a testament to the fact. The deep (safe) caves in the Ozarks and the Norway seed bank are my top two travel destinations, although I can only travel by land or sea... It's not so much that I have a fear of flying... It's more a fear of tall buildings. I'd just like to thank everyone here at GLP for making me the person I am today. Without your help I wouldn't have such a highly developed work ethic and could very well have ended up married to some reality blind societal sheep woman. Immediately state your intention for any further correspondence... CalmShock That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. "...the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." I John 1:7 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." Romans 6:23 And this is the record, that God hath given |
Cassie :-) User ID: 10262276 United States 03/02/2013 07:29 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The incessant ringing of the phone woke me at 9:06am. It was my uncle Frankie. He yelled "TELEPHONE POLES WILL BE DAMAGED!" like always. I half laughed and hung up on him. Quoting: Antediluvian Lit up a Morley and went out to check on my tomato plants. Looked like there was a storm comin' in so I decided to take them inside. Mailman came by as I was doing that and gave me a package. Inside was the new Fandango Rangers CD, Brokeback Rangers: Liberace Re-imagined. I was about to throw it in the player when I saw a movement out in the yard. It was the neighbor kid going BEZERK! I went out to him but the only thing I could get out of him was "The two witnesses are coming! The two witnesses are coming!". Took a drag from the Morley and just shook my head. Crazy kid. I turned to go back inside and noticed my other neighbor had put up a new flag. It was yellow with the letters B.S. I laughed. He was certainly full of it. He was always babbling about Zetas or the Galactic Federation or something but I never paid any attention. Went back inside and checked my email. Saw newsletters from the Real John Lear and John Titor. I'd read them later. Had to check the World At War thread on GLP first. Knocking interrupted me. It was the father of the crazy kid. "Sorry about Damian. He's really been affected by the chem-trails lately." "It's ok," I said, "life is like a box of chocolates. Empty and filled with brown paper wrappers." I shut the door, turned on the radio and put it on my favorite channel. UVB-76. I sat down, put out the Morley, and smiled. Time for a nap. That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. "...the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." I John 1:7 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." Romans 6:23 And this is the record, that God hath given |
cyryl User ID: 35293365 Russia 03/02/2013 07:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Cassie :-) User ID: 10262276 United States 03/02/2013 07:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | "Server Busy - We'll back soon, don't panic!" Quoting: Dom Diputs That was the last message ever returned from a GLP server on the Internet. I read it at 12:43pm, CMT on a Friday. I had just finished reading about Chinese hack attacks on US cyber infrastructure, Janet Napolitano's shrill warnings about an impending "Cyber 9/11", and yet another call from the Obama White House for absolute control of the Internet in the form of an "Internet kill switch" to save us from “terrorists”. I think Cyber 9/11 happened on that day. And I'm not ashamed to say I'm scared. I'm writing this on a word processor and saving it to a local file on my laptop, because all Internet access is down. No GLP, no Google, no Facebook, no email. I can't even get DHCP from my ISP. That was 6 days ago. I guess I’m hoping the ‘net comes back up so I can blog this. Hoping, praying… At least cellphone networks stayed up for while longer. But just voice and SMS, no Internet data access. The last SMS I got was a Geomagnetic Storm Warning from spaceweather.com. It was K-index 5, which isn’t a big deal. Then it went to a K-index of 6, then 7. I talked to my parents in Kansas, and asked them how they were doing. They don’t have Internet access, so nothing seemed out of place to them. That was 3 days ago. This morning, the radio and TV networks switched over to the EBS, multi-tone test pattern and everything. But no announcement was forthcoming. So we’re in some emergency, deaf and blind, and nobody is telling us what it is. Was a North Korean air burst nuke EMP attack? A new Carrington Event? Chinese cyber first strike? A barrage of meteors? What’s going on? The silence and not knowing, that’s the worst part. Actually, that’s not the worst part. The power just went out... (Entry #1) Wow! Very creepy and most likely spot on! Very well written! That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. "...the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." I John 1:7 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." Romans 6:23 And this is the record, that God hath given |
Dr. Acula (OP) Senior Forum Moderator User ID: 57407 United States 03/02/2013 07:44 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
WindyMind User ID: 26518293 United States 03/02/2013 08:47 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Dr. Acula Hey bouncing elephant, I would totally bite... but i already did on the 26th but if somebody can help raise you i will offer my green support to them Thanks to Dickie A Friend Rabbit (who I can't find on the who's on list) I now have 100. So now you can add another runner up prize to your list. Just PM me when you have made your choice. many thanks for contributing to this!! My pleasure. I remember Well all the hard work you put into making the santa hats for all-comers over the Christmas period. And from other posts of yours. A truly unselfish person. I like that. Very likeable as well. I would like to upgrade more people myself, but I am currently sustaining about half a dozen other members, and times are hard at the mo. Anyway, one thing you could do for me,..you could view and rate my video in my sig line and maybe leave a comment...that is...if you like it..if you don't like it, then don't leave a comment...LoL. |
WindyMind User ID: 26518293 United States 03/02/2013 08:47 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Dr. Acula Hey bouncing elephant, I would totally bite... but i already did on the 26th but if somebody can help raise you i will offer my green support to them Thanks to Dickie A Friend Rabbit (who I can't find on the who's on list) I now have 100. So now you can add another runner up prize to your list. Just PM me when you have made your choice. many thanks for contributing to this!! My pleasure. I remember Well all the hard work you put into making the santa hats for all-comers over the Christmas period. And from other posts of yours. A truly unselfish person. I like that. Very likeable as well. I would like to upgrade more people myself, but I am currently sustaining about half a dozen other members, and times are hard at the mo. Anyway, one thing you could do for me,..you could view and rate my video in my sig line and maybe leave a comment...that is...if you like it..if you don't like it, then don't leave a comment...LoL. |
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Dom Diputs User ID: 35487696 United States 03/03/2013 12:05 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The Russian meteor wasn't just a random space rock. We all knew that. What we didn't know is exactly what made it so exceptional. Yes, it was large. Yes, it was somehow undetected until it hit. Yes, there was anomalous video footage of something hitting it from a strange angle. But what was the underlying, unifying mystery that would tie all these loose threads together and give us a finished tapestry? Like every significant event, a clear picture emerges only by looking at each thread of its history. In this case, we started with the Tunguska event of 1918 which leveled 1000 square miles of Siberian forest. Forensic analysis indicated that a comet entered the cold Russian atmosphere at several kilometers per second and then exploded with the strength of a hydrogen bomb. Jumping forward to 2009, a geometric wonder appeared in the Russian sky. The Norway Spiral, as it was dubbed, was explained away as a run-away Russian missile, but few people believed this mundane explanation for such a striking heavenly event. In February 2013, the world’s eyes were on the skies, tracking the near-Earth approach of DA14, an asteroid that was detected in 2012 and was projected to miss Earth by several thousand miles. And then, literally out of nowhere, the previously unseen Russian object streaked through the cold Russian airspace and exploded, destroying several buildings and injuring 1100 stunned individuals. Like a Jerry Bruckheimer film, this spectacle of destruction terrified an entire country whose scientific and military might was apparently completely unable to detect, let alone defend itself from this onslaught from space. Were these strange, destructive space events spanning a century related? Once assembled, the answer was of such dark scope and of such terrible scale as to bury the inquiring timid mind safely in insanity… |
ashis User ID: 1490898 Canada 03/03/2013 12:27 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The incessant ringing of the phone woke me at 9:06am. It was my uncle Frankie. He yelled "TELEPHONE POLES WILL BE DAMAGED!" like always. I half laughed and hung up on him. Quoting: Antediluvian Lit up a Morley and went out to check on my tomato plants. Looked like there was a storm comin' in so I decided to take them inside. Mailman came by as I was doing that and gave me a package. Inside was the new Fandango Rangers CD, Brokeback Rangers: Liberace Re-imagined. I was about to throw it in the player when I saw a movement out in the yard. It was the neighbor kid going BEZERK! I went out to him but the only thing I could get out of him was "The two witnesses are coming! The two witnesses are coming!". Took a drag from the Morley and just shook my head. Crazy kid. I turned to go back inside and noticed my other neighbor had put up a new flag. It was yellow with the letters B.S. I laughed. He was certainly full of it. He was always babbling about Zetas or the Galactic Federation or something but I never paid any attention. Went back inside and checked my email. Saw newsletters from the Real John Lear and John Titor. I'd read them later. Had to check the World At War thread on GLP first. Knocking interrupted me. It was the father of the crazy kid. "Sorry about Damian. He's really been affected by the chem-trails lately." "It's ok," I said, "life is like a box of chocolates. Empty and filled with brown paper wrappers." I shut the door, turned on the radio and put it on my favorite channel. UVB-76. I sat down, put out the Morley, and smiled. Time for a nap. Liked this story. I liked this one too it's the best |
DaKine User ID: 32201241 United States 03/03/2013 01:10 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I awoke suddenly to the thump, thump, thump, of the helicopter rotor blades. Jumping off the couch I glance at the clock, it's 11:11 p.m. WTF is going on?? Has TSHTF? I find myself running from room to room not knowing what to do. All this fucking prepping and i forgot to plan my first step. My instinct is to go to my laptop and sign on to GLP. Surely, Doorbert or Luisport must have a handle on what is happening. The sound of the helicopters is deafening, so logging into voicechat will be impossible. WTF is going on with GLP? Fucking servers are down or something. "Don't panic!" Yah, right! If not now....when? I finally use the brain God gave me and I go outside to see WITH MY OWN EYES what is going on......aw shit.....this is it....It's TEOTWAWKI!! Helicopters fill the moonlit sky. Each one shining a large spotlight to the ground. I run back inside and grab Pinky (my chihuahua. we go everywhere together) and we go to the backyard. Astonished, I look up to see a large lavender helicopter hoovering above. Emitting from the belly of this beautiful beast is a silver beam of light which forms a glowing circle just feet before me. "Step into the circle" a voice yells from above. Terrified I shout, "who are you?? where do you come from?" I glance up, eyes squinting, to see a large man. He looks a lot like Santa Claus except he has long beautiful curly red hair. "It's me Trinity, from GLP. Step inside the circle. You'll be safe with us!" WTF? Is this for real? Can this guy be trusted? I yell, "I'm scared, I'm not sure what to do?" Just then Pinky starts yelping wildly......I look up and peeking around Trinity's legs I see ANHEDONIC, Ralph, AKO and all the rest of the GLP doggies. Feeling safe cause I trust dogs more than I do humans, I step into the circle. Ooops...I'm at 334 words....gotta stop now. |
Fuddy-Duddy User ID: 21100567 United States 03/03/2013 01:25 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Here is my submission and, to my chagrin, it's a true story. It happened in October. I was alone. I had been on a little hike as the leaves were past their peak and were starting to fall. I went to get in my car as it was already dark and I had intended to get back to the car earlier. Something caught my attention through the trees. It was a light of some sort and it appeared to be getting higher and brighter by the second. I thought to myself, o crap, I’ve got to get outta here. I quickly got in the car, started it, and threw gravel as I sped away. It seemed like the light was following me. I was really getting more frightened by the minute. What was that light and why was it following me?? Perhaps I should have heeded the orgone thread. I made a mental note. Must go back and read all that UFO stuff. I pulled into my driveway and prepared to run into my house as quickly as possible. As I bolted from the car, I noticed the light again, it was even brighter. Then I paused to actually get a look at what it was. Oh, my bad. It was just the full moon rising. Wonder what made my imagination run so wild. Hmmm, could it be, could it be...GLP??? Last Edited by Fuddy-Duddy on 03/03/2013 04:13 PM “I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.” Abraham Lincoln |
Ford44 User ID: 8064176 United States 03/03/2013 01:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | It was an ordinary day, not much different than the thousands of others that I’ve lived through. After making and pouring my morning coffee, I fired up my computer. There were no new emails, so I clicked over to Godlike Productions to see what today’s doom forecast was. Godlike Productions is a conspiracy minded web forum that I liked to visit for shits and giggles. “STHTF! Elite heading to their bunkers! METEOR impact EMINENT!” I clicked and took a look. It seems that someone’s uncle works for DHS, and he tipped of the OP that a fifty mile wide asteroid had escaped the telescopes of the amateur astronomers, and the president, the Queen of England, Bill Gates, and Oprah were headed to Denver to hide in the massive underground city that was built there. Operation Oz Ark is what they called it. He said we have twelve hours before the SHTF. The Op had posted this @ 9 PM the previous evening. The clock on my com said it was now 8:14 A.M. The rest of the thread was various posters raising the bullshit flag. I was suddenly startled by my dog howling at the window. I went over to see what the commotion was about, and I saw a huge fireball streaking across the sky. I rushed out my door and gazed upon it.. I had long suspected that I was the chosen one who would save mankind, mentioned on the site as the “NOBODY”. Now was the time to put up or shut up, so I closed my eyes, raised my hands to the air, and imagined the asteroid being shifted to an alternate dimension. As the concussion turned my insides to jelly, I remember thinking “Shit! It wasn’t me after all!” |
Folks Grinn ,Travvy User ID: 726900 Puerto Rico 03/03/2013 02:03 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | To counteract or neutralize speculation. It is none contractual without specified relation to contextual beliefs portrayed in an exemplified way without forced practice to attune before one decides to relay messages missed. All while eye openingly blinds or makes seen the disorderly for reasons measured knowingly in amounts which amount to nothing gained or acquired that required nonsense existing underneath patches forming the entire basis spinning atop A stasis inside of this place is A pace reaching critical rate in time lapsing fazes blitzing stages created out of pages written sometimes spitten free flowingly lib'd adding spice as if rolling dice through an alley of fates own reality which paves paths future and passed A past long ago featured and may be still, yet actively creating! Though, I am not insinuating. So therefor am I? No I am not I am only writing I'm not the creator. This to me is, and what is GLP? Well, its all of them, you, and me. All the way from somebody to the nobody however all inclusive to everybody and even the tomato plants crazy uncles and even more crazy aunts. All the conspiracy theorists the clever boisterous and insidious liars also the truth telling whitewashers atlas the tasty truth tellers you know "all of those the insiders". Lets not forget the theorists of conspirators its wordplay not doubled though I think we might all be just as troubled not troubling for of course to most of us these times are unsettling with groups being made purchased claimed and trashed all on the platform said to be crumbling as many passing thru stumbling and crashing. By Travis. The one who said on here many times I will soon destroy the world "JOKINGLY" and said that the planet had just ben finished being turned into a giant space ship with one elderly Chinese man at the wheel. Folks Grinn, Travvy lee................................................................................................................................................................................. |
Dr. Acula (OP) Senior Forum Moderator User ID: 80172 United States 03/03/2013 02:21 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | To counteract or neutralize speculation. It is none contractual without specified relation to contextual beliefs portrayed in an exemplified way without forced practice to attune before one decides to relay messages missed. All while eye openingly blinds or makes seen the disorderly for reasons measured knowingly in amounts which amount to nothing gained or acquired that required nonsense existing underneath patches forming the entire basis spinning atop A stasis inside of this place is A pace reaching critical rate in time lapsing fazes blitzing stages created out of pages written sometimes spitten free flowingly lib'd adding spice as if rolling dice through an alley of fates own reality which paves paths future and passed A past long ago featured and may be still, yet actively creating! Though, I am not insinuating. So therefor am I? No I am not I am only writing I'm not the creator. This to me is, and what is GLP? Well, its all of them, you, and me. All the way from somebody to the nobody however all inclusive to everybody and even the tomato plants crazy uncles and even more crazy aunts. All the conspiracy theorists the clever boisterous and insidious liars also the truth telling whitewashers atlas the tasty truth tellers you know "all of those the insiders". Lets not forget the theorists of conspirators its wordplay not doubled though I think we might all be just as troubled not troubling for of course to most of us these times are unsettling with groups being made purchased claimed and trashed all on the platform said to be crumbling as many passing thru stumbling and crashing. By Travis. The one who said on here many times I will soon destroy the world "JOKINGLY" and said that the planet had just ben finished being turned into a giant space ship with one elderly Chinese man at the wheel. Folks Grinn, Travvy lee................................................................................................................................................................................. 317 words you rebel you Thanks for sharing _______________________ |
Folks grinn User ID: 726900 Puerto Rico 03/03/2013 02:35 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | To counteract or neutralize speculation. It is none contractual without specified relation to contextual beliefs portrayed in an exemplified way without forced practice to attune before one decides to relay messages missed. All while eye openingly blinds or makes seen the disorderly for reasons measured knowingly in amounts which amount to nothing gained or acquired that required nonsense existing underneath patches forming the entire basis spinning atop A stasis inside of this place is A pace reaching critical rate in time lapsing fazes blitzing stages created out of pages written sometimes spitten free flowingly lib'd adding spice as if rolling dice through an alley of fates own reality which paves paths future and passed A past long ago featured and may be still, yet actively creating! Though, I am not insinuating. So therefor am I? No I am not I am only writing I'm not the creator. This to me is, and what is GLP? Well, its all of them, you, and me. All the way from somebody to the nobody however all inclusive to everybody and even the tomato plants crazy uncles and even more crazy aunts. All the conspiracy theorists the clever boisterous and insidious liars also the truth telling whitewashers atlas the tasty truth tellers you know "all of those the insiders". Lets not forget the theorists of conspirators its wordplay not doubled though I think we might all be just as troubled not troubling for of course to most of us these times are unsettling with groups being made purchased claimed and trashed all on the platform said to be crumbling as many passing thru stumbling and crashing. By Travis. The one who said on here many times I will soon destroy the world "JOKINGLY" and said that the planet had just ben finished being turned into a giant space ship with one elderly Chinese man at the wheel. Folks Grinn, Travvy lee................................................................................................................................................................................. 317 words you rebel you Thanks for sharing lol that's all I had thx for reading its actually part of A page in my book I wrote. have a good one people |
WindyMind User ID: 26518293 United States 03/03/2013 02:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Nobody even liked Johns story. Your never going to see on like it again. Last Edited by WindyMind on 03/03/2013 03:57 PM |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 34935931 United States 03/03/2013 03:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I like being an AC, but you inspired me to write this gem. So... Here it goes. I ain’t ever seen a naked man before. That is until last 4th of July when the old man across the road came running out his house, in the buck, hollering about how he just shot an alien creeping in his kitchen. He has always been a little crazy, and had been known for hanging around in nothing but his skivvies or some old waders. He liked to sit on his porch, brandishing that Remington 1740, eyeing the middle schoolers as they stepped off the buss. He never did no harm, none. Maybe a little cussing now and then, but he’d shut right up when their parents would make a fuss. He’d stair out his front window for hours waiting for that bus’s yellow tint to peak through the corn. We all just thought he was lonely. You may ask your self, “What does that have to do with him shooting an alien?” Well it don’t. I just thought it’d give you a better sense of who he was, you see, he was an ornery cuss most the time. Not known for showing signs of trepidation. But that morning, boy I tell you, he squealed like a sally getting poked by a rhino. I looked out just in time to see him haul ass across the road. He was already on my porch when I got to the door, standing there shivering like some shriveled hopped up tweaker. “I just shot a goddamn alien!” he muttered. I yelled to my wife to get him a blanket and we sat and had a cup of coffee while we waited for the police. The police searched for hours and didn’t find a goddamn thing. Needless to say, he felt a little shamed as he walked back home draped in that old afghan with his head held low. He’s just lonely, is all. |