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Subject HELP! I Think My Neighbor's Garden Gnome Is Trying To Get Me!!!

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Original Message It's one of those garden gnome statues during the day, but at night I can hear it moving around. I hear this little tiny pitter-patter running through my neighbor's yard, and an evil little giggle. I've even seen its shadowy outline as it walked over to the fence and stared at me. It was about 1 ft tall.

I think it cut my brake lines once (twice actually), and it may be harassing my dog too. He hasn't been acting normal. I think it may have threatened him, or tried to seduce him.

When I lay down to go to sleep, I can hear it climbing onto the roof outside my window and then it taps on my window and does that evil giggle. And then today I awoke when I heard a tiny voice whisper my name in my ear. When I jumped up I saw a little man with a pointy red hat run out of my bedroom. He was laughing with that evil little giggle, and I think he stole my car keys, because I couldn't find them anywhere, but then I found them where they weren't supposed to be.

I'm afraid to go to work because I think he might be hiding in my car waiting to get me. I'm afraid that the evil little imp will be hiding in my back seat and pounce on me while I am driving.

I think he has it in for me. What if he tries to smother me in my sleep or steal my breath or something?

Does anyone know how to get rid of him? Does anyone else have any experience with vicious killer garden gnomes?

I live in amish country and I think maybe that little amish kid put a hex on the gnome and is making it harass me because I didn't have any money to buy the bread he was selling.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss as to what I should do to protect myself from the evil little killer garden gnome from hell.

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