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Subject WTF? Nibiru is in my back garden - mystery solved
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Original Message I thought I saw something this evening in the garden so I poked my head out the back door and saw something glowing down at the end, behind the rose bush.

I crept quietly down and looked behind the bush -well, my heart almost stopped and then it began to melt.

There was a little planet, curled up in a ball, shivering nervously.

"Hello" I said "what's your name?"

"Nibiru" was the answer. "I'm hiding here until December then I'm going to jump up in the sky and blow your arse to kingdom come".

"Ah okay" I said "do you want a cup of tea while you're waiting?"

"That would be grand" Nibby (as I now think of him)said "milk, no sugar please. And a chocolate hob-nob if you have one".

So there you have it - if you're all frantically looking for Nibiru, he's behind my rose bush. Drinking tea.
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