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Original Message
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After 31 years (exactly). I am going to reveal to you, under this anonymous name, what I saw, what I know.
First of all, I am different, (no I'm not gay if that's what you are thinking). I never quite fit in, anywhere in my family or among most of the people I have interacted with. It takes a special to person to truly know me, truly understand me. I'm very good at certain things, it appears to be some kind of a gift. My mother was good at a few things, but mostly at drinking, this killed her, when I was 16. 1995 was the year. It wasn't a fast death, and that left only my father, thousands of miles away from any other family and only a few friends. I felt a need for more family and demanded to my father that we move back to Michigan from Colorado, where I was born.
Of course he obliged, I really didn't leave him a choice. I am NOT a demanding person, so the one time I told him, I demanded of him, he obliged.
We almost lost everything on the way there, early morning traveling on the highway far outside of Denver heading east. I thought about things, I envisioned possible futures, everything seemed possible at this moment. Then the U-Haul started rocking, some serious winds on the plains picked up and we weren't even out of Colorado yet. But this was a very deserted part of the road, no traffic for miles. The U-Haul started rocking, everything left in my life at that moment was in the back of that truck or sitting next to me, and I saw it all disappearing. The truck rocked VIOLENTLY, and as I thought of all the bad that was about to happen, us flipping over in a huge U-Haul along a deserted stretch of highway at like 4am, with all my stuff in the back, my Dad next to me, and traveling 60+mph, I suddenly became calm. I accepted whatever possible future was ahead of me. And just like that, my dad got control of the vehicle. Yes he was slowing down, but the rocking was literally throwing us side to side, at one point I feel we were on just 2 tires and my Father was doing EVERYTHING he could just to keep us upright.
I got to Michigan, my life in turmoil, hadn't officially graduated High School, mother died, no siblings, and a Father who I had never really interacted with much (due to an early divorce).
Now I take you back, to when I was between 3 and 4. My dad was at a friends, working on a carpet job (tearing it out, for replacement). I helped out as much as I could, I could speak and read very early, and understood much more than any
of my peers at that age. I remember taking scraps to the dumpster, it was easy, throw them in, no possible harm in that. But the friend had 3 cement steps in his back yard area (where the dumpster was located). On the way back, and so stupidly, I was skipping some of the thin carpeting like a jump rope. I don't honestly remember why, I just was. I tripped myself, right into the cement step. I blacked out. Only time in my life I have blacked out, and I've had some serious impacts since then.
The rest of this part of the story is a little hazy, so I prefer to tell it with all the info I found out afterward with what I experienced. It makes it more complete.
I (apparently) woke up, and with my hand on my head I stumbled/walked inside to alert my father. Instantly they understood the seriousness of the situation. And I believe I passed out again. I remember the feeling of something warm on my hand.
I awoke in a vehicle, it was a truck, my dad was in the passenger seat, we were SCREAMING down the highway, my dad's hand was on my head. I looked up, I really couldn't say anything.
I woke up again next in the hospital, hooked up to all sorts of stuff. It was bright on the table, dark around it, I only remember seeing one of the doctors, who was stitching me up. I passed out again.
When I told this story before, that is all I ever told anyone in my family or my close friends. But the truth is, in between my truck ride to the hospital, losing many pints of blood, and ending up with 7 stitches in my forehead, I was somewhere else for a while. Somewhere outside of my body, before I could comprehend what that even meant. I was on the other side of the world, you might call it heaven, the veil, another reality, another universe, but I was there.
I am sure you want to know what is there, I am just as curious. I remember only a few things. The feeling of light (not visual, but as if light penetrated you and was some form of healing energy). I felt warm, so comfortable, as if it were a cold winter and I was wrapped in the warmest blankets and had no where to go all day. I never wanted to leave. But I had to come back, there was this essence, something (NOT a voice) that inferred to me, that I had to accomplish something. I had to make a very important choice, and until that time, or until my death, the choice would be mine to make.
So I tell you all of that back story, to tell you this.
The choice, of if this world is to continue on it's current path, or be dramatically altered by what many may even call DIVINE INTERVENTION, well that choice is my choice. It was given to me by God, whatever name you wish to call God, or whatever religion or non-religion you may be. There is a force beyond our comprehension, it's stronger than you, and the most you can do is live your life and die, and then you will know for certain. Until then, you can offer me no proof there isn't a God, so you must believe me.
I choose our fate in this world, I realize that is a bold statement and you probably thing of me as egotistical or some kind of mental nut job/psychopath. I assure you, I am highly educated (especially self educated), I am just not much of a material person. I like to have a few things, but feel I am blessed to even have those. I share when I can, I care always, I try to help people who deserve to be helped. I can't do everything and I am by no means perfect. I don't hit women, I am non-violent in general. I never raise my voice or yell. I find it difficult when two opposing opinions meet and neither can get a foothold over the other, but I accept it, and don't lose it. I have been hurt in my life, demolished even. But I have also been very lucky, extremely lucky, beyond lucky. Not with money or material possessions but with situations, and how they work out. For as much as I worry, I never have to, something or someone always comes along to help me exactly when I need it. And in return, I have helped others when I could. I've started a Pay it Forward chain before. I've helped complete strangers and never asked for anything in return, is basically what I am saying. I am no Mother Theresa, I have a dark side. I have reactions to how people treat me, usually it ends with me wishing the person harm but never actually doing any harm to them. Actually, to be more precise, it ends with me wishing them their Karma. I believe what goes around comes around, and if someone dares to treat me horribly on purpose, then they will get what they deserve.
I have seen literally THOUSANDS of examples of this in my life. I am one person you don't want to cross, for fear of your own well being. And not because I will retaliate, but because the universe will. I believe this is true of certain others as well. So please take my most sincere words to heart, and realize that I hold the keys to our future here.
I would like it, if everyone who read and actually understood this message would take it to heart, that someone else is in ultimate control of your destiny, and if you wish to see the human race get out of this world alive, you need to treat everyone as equals. I am no better or worse than any other living being who is sentient. I may be smarter than some, stupider than others, but the choice of our future is in my hands and I am still undecided that we deserve to have a future. It is up to you, to convince me. I will continue interacting, reading, researching, and conversing with people of GLP and others. If you can, if you have it within you, I urge you now to follow your destiny. If you hold back, all may be lost.
Seek and you will find me.
The darkness comes and the darkness goes.
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