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11:47 PM
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So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
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[quote:luckyophelia:MV8yMDI4NTg3XzM0MDkyOTc3XzQ1MDQzMkYy] [quote:Kirk:MV8yMDI4NTg3XzM0MDkyODc5X0EzN0U3NUMy] [quote:luckyophelia:MV8yMDI4NTg3XzM0MDkyNTkyX0EyRjcxMjk3] and no hes not creative however i do paint, play piano, write, etc. He just doesn't seem to have a strong sense of identity and I'm trying to help him with that but i guess i cant really change a person. i think change is the wrong word. i dont want to change a thing about him. i just think he could grow more, and being more assertive is part of that. [/quote] you have problems too, sweet pea. You say he dated a 40 year old? Surrogate mother? Born that way? - 90 plus percent are born loving but get it beaten out of them or repressed in some way. To change someone you have to understand the mechanics and I don't believe you have an inkling. It doesn't happen because you are nice. Really. You are ignoring the reaction you are having to your own frustrated expectations. Neither of you are grown up sweetie.Most of us are walking wounded. Seek healing and trust me - open communication, no secrets, no unvoiced wishes. Tell who you are. Ask who he is, and pay attention. [/quote] :hf: thank you ive been in therapy 2 years now and still working on the healing part of things. he wasn't with a surrogate mother and didn't have one but the woman did hide the fact that she had 4 kids from him for 9 years, which just made me really freakin angry, not at him, for him. i agree, commnunication is the issue here. thanks <3 [/quote]
Original Message
I'm not trying to be selfish and I really don't want to come across that way so if this is just irrational thinking then please let me know people
...I just really was expecting something a little more sentimental after a year. I'm glad he thought of the gesture and tha he took the time off his lunch break the day before to go get it for me, and I really love him, i just thought I'd get something a little more personal and intimate.
What do you guys think about this? I'm curious
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