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Subject I'm really depressed.

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Why did you push her away OP????   Just wondering...
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It's not that I wanted to. I realize now that I wasn't making her happy, emotionally. Then the night she broke up with me, I was very drunk, and I said really mean things to her on the phone. I can't believe my mouth could say such things to her.. but it happened. She does deserve better, the way I have been acting.

I just understand all the things I was doing wrong now. The depression is coming from not knowing I could have changed thing for the better. Maybe it's something I'm just suppose to learn. We'll get back together eventually, when I get my shit together and prove it.

Depression is just something I can't always control. It comes out of no where like a kick to the face. I suppose it's healthy. Just sucks.
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yo, have you considered that the alcohol opened you up to demonic influence? poor diet combined w this can lead to trouble--been there!

maybe this is a sign for you to become more spiritually smart about the game here...

the supernatural is real and even if you don't understand this, doesn't make it go away...

plus there is evidence that the system is employing low/dissonant frequencies at you... if you don't go for a supernatural take, consider that certain elites might want to break apart couples to make the society easier to control... the bond between men and women is the strongest social bond possible and making love to someone in a loving way is powerful energy that keeps you free and independent...

http://www.godlikeproductions.com/forum1/message2001066/pg1
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HOLY POOP.
That is exactly what I thought of the next day of the break up. One of my faults is insecurity. I know I am a pretty good looking guy and I'm not obese by any means but I did have a somewhat poor diet. I already considered myself spiritual but I never really meditated or such things, I just mostly thought about it with my mind.

That very next day I was so motivated and still am to start eating healthy. I have been eating a lot of fruit and eating right sized portions. I work out for at least 4 hours a day now. What I mean by that is, I have done much research on maximizing my results, such as strength training, HITT training on the treadmill. When I get exhausted I start to walk on the treadmill and I have my laptop in front of me so I can go on GLP or watch something or whatever. This past week my stomach has been very sensitive when I eat meat or if I put something in the microwave so I have stopped eating meat and using the microwave.

I have been meditating for at least 20 mins a day. Last night I woke up around 3 am couldn't fall back to sleep so I meditated for an hour and it was nostalgic feeling. It felt really nice. I am going to meditate for longer periods of time now.

I am starting to love myself more. There's always that saying that if you can't love yourself you can't love others and in a way, that is what I feel like I'm experiencing.

Thank you so much:hf::hf:
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Save some money on the gym and go out walking in nature instead... it will cure your depression even faster, while you're exercising healthily at the same time..

good luck op, and with a depression out of the way there's room for new love :hf:
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I'm not going to a gym, I have a treadmill in my house and some weights. You're right though, I didn't think about taking walks outside when I do feel depressed. Thank you for your wisdom.
:hf::hf:
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Original Message It sucks.
Personal Doom.
Pushed my girlfriend of almost 6 years away, 3 weeks ago.
I feel really shitty.
I know that all I can do is become a better person.
I know my faults, and I didn't do anything about it.
I think it hurts more knowing that I didn't step up.
She told me not to talk to her for "a very long time"
She posted a picture 2 weeks ago of her having a hickey. I called her out on it saying it was really disrespectful towards me.
She disagreed. She said she was trying to make the best out of an ugly situation.
When we were together she didn't like when I gave her hickeys on her neck.
Idk.
It just really hurts. Sometimes I just feel numb everywhere, like now.
I'll overcome it.. It's just a bit hard being introverted and not having anyone to talk to.
Thanks for listening.

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