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Subject I want to join the Illuminati

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Original Message How do I join? I want to be rich and wear creepy robes and do weird ceremonies and rituals with old white men in places sheeple can't go to. Any way to do this? I don't have to let the guys screw me do I? I don't want to do any of the weird sex stuff, I just want to do creepy chants and get lots of money and jewelery with odd occult symbols so I can go outside and flaunt it and laugh inside knowing no one will know that my secret serpent ring is actually a secret bond with my reptilian brethren. I think I'd fit in with reptiles more than humans, my tongue flicks out a lot, I have snakes for pets, and I collect artwork of dragons cuz I think they're cool.

So what are my chances of getting in?

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