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BREAKING: World pin shortage critical
Ms Sans Serif
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Today thumbtack manufacturers released an emergency notice to suppliers. Die to the rampant and excessive use of thumbtacks they have run short of supply.
This is expected to hit the buisiness world hard as they rely on these on a daily basis for things as trivial as whats for lunch all the way up to which company will be bought out next. CEO of Porsche claimed "Well I never really liked VWs but they were the only one still on my wall of things to buy. My secretary stole the rest of my tacks."
Even the press has had to scale back as they have less reminders as to what is going on in the news. One reporter states "Well I only had one tack left so I decided to pick a random story and I ended up with that dumb fire in California. I was really hoping to make Britney Spears the front page story today."
When asked why there was such a spike Qingdao Ant Hardware Manufacturing Co Ltd., a maker of thumbtacks and pins, president Tan Dong replied "We believe this has been due to an overreaction as of late in certain niche websites to certain world events. They seem to think that the world is about to collapse from some Cuban financial ring who has paid off Bush to cover up its roll in 9/11 by setting these mass fires in California to kill as many homosexuals as possible. Its all absured to me but just look for yourself."
True as told, when reviewing conspiracy type websites like Godlike Productions, one can see an incredible glut of pins on the website. In an attempt to get to the bottom of this we tracked the website owner to a small trailer home on the outskirts of Las Vegas who goes by the online handle of Trinity. Unfortunately we were only able to get as ar as the crude electric fence. A man appeared at the door wearing what appeared to be a tinfoil hat but made no reply to our repeated questions and soon disappeared again.
Experts say that if this continues, the world could begin to see an increased level of economic slowdown due to the populace forgetting simple things like paying bills. The entertainment industry is also expected to see a downturn as less and less people will remember about that great new movie or "the game".
We will continue to attemp to keep you updated on this developing story assuming we don't run out of thumbtacks ourselves.
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