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Subject The History of Israel and Palestine in easy to understand, colorful language.
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Message Welp, since there is a confrontation going on, I thought it would be time to post this as it's own thread.

Here ya go...Historicaly accurate and simple terminology.

Yeah it dogs the Arabs at the end...but IMO they deserve some dogging, so flame on. Write a counter to it...if you can...;)

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Israel is where it is today because that's where the holy land, land of the Jews whatever the fuck anyone wants to call it. Same place it has been since biblical times, which is as far as I'm concerned is all the bible has to do with it, biblical times happened there and all that "Chosen people" junk doesn't come into play for the actual and real history of the region. It's not like Israel used to be in Australia during the bible days and someone just decided to move it where it is now because there was less humidity, it's where it's been since....forever, called whatever, but that's the place geographically.

Through the centuries various empires have more or less "owned" the region, the Romans, the Turks with the Ottoman empire, the British when they ruled Britannia, yada yada various owners over eons. In the late 19th century some Jews thought it would be a good idea to move back to the holy land from biblical times where there used to plenty of em as well as a bunch of Arabs, mostly Syrians, all living together. So they begin to buy some land, and some Jews start to move there. These are the original "Zionists". The Ottoman empire of the Turks own the region at this time and there aren't a whole lot people there, sparse Arabs that call themselves Syrians and a lot of the area itself is mostly a crap hole infested with camel spiders and malaria ridden swamps. The Jews that go there begin to work on draining the swamps and riding the area of malaria. Lot's of Arabs emigrate there too because there is work available spiffing up the land, and the land is getting better, all happy happy.

WWI happens and the Turks side with the Germans which was a piss poor choice because they lost. So the entire area gets "Mandated" to the British and French who were on the winning side, tough crap Turks, you lost, buh bye, you don't own the region anymore. So under the Sykes-Picot Agreement in 1916 the area gets divided into zones of influence. Lebanon and Syria were assigned (mandated) to France... and "Palestine" (today's Jordan, Israel and "West Bank") gets mandated to Great Britain. Since no one had ever established a homeland in the region since the Jews had like 2000 years ago in the bible times, the Brits looked pretty favorably at them doing it again, since they were already there and greatly improving living conditions.

Several years later in 1923 Britain divides the area they have control of. They take the Jordan river as the dividing line. West of that will be the only area that Jews will be allowed to own land, the other side will be the Arab side. So the country of Trans-Jordan is created. One side will be Arab-Palestine homeland, about 75% of the British mandate, the other side will be Jew-Palestine homeland, the remaining 25%. So the big side gets handed over to an Emir from what is now Saudi Arabia to take control over, who isn't even from the region, and that is pretty much the end of calling that a Palestinian-Arab homeland, cause he ain't a Palestinian.

Right around this time Arab Nationalism is growing strong, they start to launch attacks on the Jews in the 25% country. Some pretty bad ones like the Hebron massacres of 1929 and later during the 1936-39 Arab Revolt. The Brits try to maintain order for awhile, but there are now large oil deposits being discovered in the Middle east so they slack off and pretty much turn a blind eye to the fighting going on. Right about this time the Jews figure they are on their own so they had better start to defend themselves or they're gonna get wasted and nobody will care because the owners of the countries are more concerned about the oil they found close by. So they form up what is now known as the IDF to defend themselves from the Arabs attacking them as well as ultimately having the goal of chucking out the Brits and being an independent country one day since the Brits don't really give a crap about them anyway.

So several years go by and the New Jew defense force does pretty well handling itself against the Arabs attacking them. They also do pretty well against the pro Arab Brits as far as keeping them at bay too. During this time WWII happens, the Brits are pretty busy with the Nazi War machine as most of Europe and the rest of the world are. The Nazis roast and kill a ton of Jews during WWII and have some pretty serious Jew hate genocide psychosis deal going on. The Jews are plenty pissed off about that one, but they hold their own in Palestine-Jew land and survive, various squabbling continues with the Arabs. So after WWII Britain is about done playing World War and British empire so they say fuck this crap going on there and turn the whole area over the newly formed UN to do whatever they want with it, they don't want any more part of it.

So the UN says OK we'll divide up Jew-Palestine land like this, going by where the Arabs and the Jews are already at, here yas go, Jew-Palestinian homeland here and Arab-Palestinian Homeland there, divided out of what used to be all Jew-Palestine land, have at it. The Arabs say, fuck you we want all of it, and the Jews say fuck you back we are already here, plus you nimrods of the rest of the world keep dividing Jew-Palestine land down and we were the ones that brought this shithole up to some halfway decent living standards years and years ago, so we ain't leavin it now. Israel says fuck you Arabs you ain't takin the whole thing and leavin us with nothing, we're taking what the UN gave us, which ain't much, before someone figures out how to divide more away. So Israel declares itself a State along the lines of UN resolution 181 and says now we're called Israel and everyone here is Israelis, fuck you we exist now. We got everyone involved in this deal trying to screw us over and or attack us for decades, plus the Nazis just tried to bake a shitload of us, we got a little spot here, leave us the fuck alone already and quit killin and attackin' us.

The very next day 7 Arab nations Launch a full scale assault on the new country of Israel to blow them off the planet. A lot of Arabs that were living in the new state of Israel haul ass because there is a war coming. Also the Arab nations tell them that once they kick the Jews asses in Israel they can have all that land, so they book and figure they'll make out good after, that was the beginning of the "Palestinian Refugee crisis" So the Arab plan to annihilate Israel doesn't really work out so swell, in fact the Arabs get their asses kicked, badly, and the Jews take a few chunks of land away to boot. The Arabs are really pissed so they tell all their Muslim buddy nations to chuck out all the Jews that have lived there for centuries, fuck them, pitch em out and take whatever they own. This is the beginning of the Jew refugee crisis.

So the Jews that get kicked out of Morocco, Algeria, etc etc say welp might as well head over to the new Jew homeland of Israel because at least maybe we catch a break there. The Arab refugees all get piled into the GAZA and West bank area and the Arab loser nations pretty much refuse to allow them to leave because they are crying about getting their asses beat by the Jews and they'd prefer to have a "Refugee crisis" to point at and cry over. Egypt has taken over the GAZA area during this war and Trans-Jordan has annexed the west bank and decides it won't be called Trans-Jordan anymore, since it doesn't really extend over the Jordan river, so now we're just called Jordan. Jordan grants the west bank Palestinians citizenship, Egypt says fuck you GAZANs we don't want you and keeps them penned in the GAZA strip, even under gunfire, we're gonna keep you in there as "refugees".

More time passes and the Arabs get together to try and blast Israel off the planet again in 1967. They mass up some pretty big armies and are ready to go and say the "objective is the annihilation of Israel" openly, but the Israelis see this coming and say fuck you Arabs we know you are going to attack us just like last time. The Israelis launch a pre-emptive attack on all the Arab armies massed up and kick the Arabs asses even worse this time. The Jew military takes the entire Sinai Peninsula away from Egypt and occupy the GAZA strip and take a few other minor hunks of land like the Golan Heights from Syria which the Jews were getting shelled from. Now the Arabs are Reeeeally Pissed off, they have lost a lot and they totally look like punks, Arabs don't like that. Israel kicked the crap out of 3 Arab nation's armies in only 6 days, and that war becomes known as the 6 day war.

Well the Arabs never got over that a little upstart Jew country beat ass on the mighty Arab armies, more than once. Over the next several decades to present day they have encouraged various attacks and suicide bombers etc etc perpetuated the "Refugee crisis" and have pretty much never quit whining and crying since about how the evil Jews shouldn't be there, blah blah, occupying Jew bastards etc etc but it all boils down to the fact that they got their asses beat more than once and Israel is a monument to their failure.

Over the decades Israel gave back a ton of land to the Arabs in the hopes that they would quit attacking and launching rockets at em, they even gave Egypt back the whole Sinai peninsula which is more land mass than all of Israel itself. Some peace accords have kinda worked but the Arabs keep crying like the loser bitches they are and keep blowing shit up and shooting various homemade piece of shit rockets into Israel because they are punk ass cry babies and can't get over being losers....more than once.
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