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New african tribe discovered

 
tribalfinda
User ID: 1016102
Australia
06/26/2010 04:02 AM
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New african tribe discovered
Hi friends, enemies and neutral aligned posters;

As i promised several times, i am here to keep you up to date on the missionary missions to Africa. They have been a resounding success! The conversation rate has been 95% , ongoing ostracising and targeting of the remaining gentiles will no doubt bring the assimilation rate to a pretty even 100%. But i have some more amazing news to tell you... we were introduced to a man whose name does not convert into English, who is the crown prince of a ancient tribe who had never ever had western contact, until now.

They are spiritless heavens who will have nothing of the good word of god but nether the less are a very interesting abnormality. With no contact with the western world , this tribe managed to develop for thousands of years unhindered by outsiders. They have developed a totally unique culture, with very interesting methods of medicine and science, they have created their own batteries and crude electricity circuits..! However, they are a covetous and suspicious people, unopen to trade and unwilling to allow me to take photographs, they feared this would "steal their souls?"

My plan is to return with a new expedition next summer and through diplomacy or force, i aim to retrieve some of these artefacts which seem to be of some cultural note.

Has anyone else on this forum had an experience in encounters with remote indigenous peoples? Successes? Failures? How did you manage to open trade relations with them?

Yours sincerly
Arnold the anthropologist missionary and christian apologist
Rev. Mother Nene

User ID: 798834
United States
06/26/2010 04:11 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
What are you converting them to?

"Christianity" is a catchall term that covers many denominations and cults.
"Imagination is more important than knowledge" - Albert Einstein

revstargazer (at) hotmail.com
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 1016102
Australia
06/26/2010 04:13 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Pentecostal christians! Praise the lord!
Susanoo

User ID: 1011944
United States
06/26/2010 04:51 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
leave them be you fucking pussy! they dont need shit from you! goddamn white people always wanna impose their shit on the 'heathens', who are in actuality far more humane than you savage fucks. soon as you leave those caucus mountains civilizations start to disappear. goddamn you people
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016148
China
06/26/2010 05:08 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Assume the missionary position at once.
OrdeII
User ID: 1016151
United States
06/26/2010 05:10 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
can you be more specific about the tribes location? can you please describe the batteries a little better?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016153
Australia
06/26/2010 05:16 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Im not so sure i should reveal the location, for all i know you have mercs and landing ships ready to go steal all the treasure! As for the batteries, they were large cylinders made of pottery, with very acidic compounds inside, with rod and diodes to capture the power.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 300884
Sweden
06/26/2010 05:48 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
can you be more specific about the tribes location? can you please describe the batteries a little better?
 Quoting: OrdeII 1016151


Easy. They took a piece of copper and a piece of zink (scavenged from the local garbage dump outside the nearest city), and inserted them into a coconut.

All indigenous tribes know how to do that.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 647237
New Zealand
06/26/2010 05:58 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
What do they call their batteries? Boomerang??
Ho_Lee_Kao

User ID: 896722
United States
06/26/2010 06:25 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
NO link, you STINK, dumbass
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 913186
United States
06/26/2010 06:26 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016186
Australia
06/26/2010 06:27 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Um no link... it seems the op is posting a personal account. You retard.
Nothing is true

User ID: 1000807
United Kingdom
06/26/2010 06:29 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
OP is posting a bullshit account..

bsflag
Everything is permitted..
Skeptic the First
User ID: 1016207
United States
06/26/2010 06:51 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Ordinarily, I would say that no real American could possibly be so stupid, and so you must be a shill. But now I see that you are Australian.

The conversation rate has been 95% , ongoing ostracising and targeting of the remaining gentiles will no doubt bring the assimilation rate to a pretty even 100%.
 Quoting: tribalfinda 1016102

"Ostracizing" and "targeting" anyone who doesn't join your sect? Surely your sect isn't Christian, then. Christians believe in the Golden Rule, and do not believe in coerced conversion.
They are spiritless heavens who will have nothing of the good word of god but nether the less are a very interesting abnormality.
 Quoting: tribalfinda 1016102

"Spiritless" humans? You actually believe that some humans don't have souls? I see--you're a Nazi.
However, they are a covetous and suspicious people, unopen to trade and unwilling to allow me to take photographs, they feared this would "steal their souls?"
 Quoting: tribalfinda 1016102

Most Americans don't like to be photographed, and aren't so thrilled about trade either.
My plan is to return with a new expedition next summer and through diplomacy or force, i aim to retrieve some of these artefacts which seem to be of some cultural note.
 Quoting: tribalfinda 1016102

So you're plotting to steal their most prized possessions? How truly Satanic of you.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016210
United Kingdom
06/26/2010 06:55 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Op, just do what missionaries do best, beat them, starve them have sex with them, kill most of them then give the rest a good old western education. By then they should be about ready to accept your religion.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016205
Australia
06/26/2010 06:56 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Ordinarily, I would say that no real American could possibly be so stupid, and so you must be a shill. But now I see that you are Australian.


The conversation rate has been 95% , ongoing ostracising and targeting of the remaining gentiles will no doubt bring the assimilation rate to a pretty even 100%.
"Ostracizing" and "targeting" anyone who doesn't join your sect? Surely your sect isn't Christian, then. Christians believe in the Golden Rule, and do not believe in coerced conversion.

They are spiritless heavens who will have nothing of the good word of god but nether the less are a very interesting abnormality.
"Spiritless" humans? You actually believe that some humans don't have souls? I see--you're a Nazi.

However, they are a covetous and suspicious people, unopen to trade and unwilling to allow me to take photographs, they feared this would "steal their souls?"
Most Americans don't like to be photographed, and aren't so thrilled about trade either.

My plan is to return with a new expedition next summer and through diplomacy or force, i aim to retrieve some of these artefacts which seem to be of some cultural note.
So you're plotting to steal their most prized possessions? How truly Satanic of you.
 Quoting: Skeptic the First 1016207


Humorous words coming from an American, a greedy race known for their low rate of education of literacy, love of trade (aka trying to rip people off for profit) and to call me satanic for liberating prized artefacts? Ha! Your whole country is based on satanic loot then, shame on you for posting on that computer on american telecommunication servers, they were only procured through the spoils of satan, after all!
Skeptic the First
User ID: 1016207
United States
06/26/2010 06:58 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
How did you manage to open trade relations with them?
 Quoting: tribalfinda 1016102

Start with the Golden Rule:

1) They are human beings, of equal value in God's eyes to yourself.

2) They have the same human rights recognized by international law that you do, including freedom from coerced religious conversion, and the right to preservation of all elements of their culture (except those incompatible with international law).

3) You are on their land, in their community, without any specific authority from the United Nations. You must live by their laws (if just), or patiently accept the consequences (if unjust).
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 900066
United States
06/26/2010 06:59 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
stfu givedamn
Skeptic the First
User ID: 1016207
United States
06/26/2010 07:00 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Humorous words coming from an American, a greedy race known for their low rate of education of literacy, love of trade (aka trying to rip people off for profit) and to call me satanic for liberating prized artefacts? Ha! Your whole country is based on satanic loot then, shame on you for posting on that computer on american telecommunication servers, they were only procured through the spoils of satan, after all!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1016205

So your excuse for your crimes is that "other people do it too"? Do you really think that will convince the Lord at your judgment? Again, you can't be Christian because Christians are not so selfishly stupid.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016205
Australia
06/26/2010 07:07 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
How did you manage to open trade relations with them?

Start with the Golden Rule:

1) They are human beings, of equal value in God's eyes to yourself.

2) They have the same human rights recognized by international law that you do, including freedom from coerced religious conversion, and the right to preservation of all elements of their culture (except those incompatible with international law).

3) You are on their land, in their community, without any specific authority from the United Nations. You must live by their laws (if just), or patiently accept the consequences (if unjust).
 Quoting: Skeptic the First 1016207


Hmm, so i get the authority of the united nations, i should be alright? One out of three aint bad...
hoot no more/hasheater
User ID: 1016204
United States
06/26/2010 07:08 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Go live with the pygmys for a while OP. Have heard that they have the best ganga. Use it when they go elephant hunting. Maybe they will take you with them, then you can "discover" why they are so small.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1016205
Australia
06/26/2010 07:15 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
How would that rather enticing yet irrelevant hedonistic sojourn help me to liberate these artefacts in the names of christ and allah and all that?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28116683
United States
11/19/2012 11:35 PM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
You are a theaf! Do not return to that place you are not liberating anything you sir are stealing and about to commit strongarm robbery you fool.
taharka
User ID: 28116683
United States
11/20/2012 12:00 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
I don't know why it is always the most ungodly most evil people whis so quick to say who has or does not have a soul.we the Moors we the Kushite we the Nubians we the egyptians gave you the knowledge of right an wrong of GOD. You stole the stories of our father off of the walls of the temples of egypt an of nubia and the first university in the world at Timbucktoo were we taught you white folk how to read an write. We were doing brain surgery when you did not have a since of time let alone a memory. But this is white folk do. Lie steal kill or make up some fake ass law that really has no juridition over the people or the land all in the name of their god-----gold-----oil----drugs. Go back and i pray you never return. They dont need shi from you or with you. So go ahead and commit that strongarm robbery as your kind always do. White boy your time is up. This will not be talorated much longer by the world of sunpeople.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28093269
United States
11/20/2012 12:03 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
leave them be you fucking pussy! they dont need shit from you! goddamn white people always wanna impose their shit on the 'heathens', who are in actuality far more humane than you savage fucks. soon as you leave those caucus mountains civilizations start to disappear. goddamn you people
 Quoting: Susanoo


Thats exactly how i feel about your zio communist bolshevick khazar masters. Especially your president.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1582303
United States
11/20/2012 12:05 AM
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Re: New african tribe discovered
Too late! Green Leader got their coordinates and sent the whole tribe home to Jesus.