Why Am I Friendless?

You can either whine about it or be proactive. Pick a volunteering activity. Something you really like. If you like dogs, volunteer at an animal shelter. That's the way to make friends, both canine and human. There's your friends. Rewards follow.

You will not find many friends if you are so quick to make assumptions about others which are not true.


I was referring to literally befriending you on this website, which can only happen if you are a registered member.

I have no problem befriending someone without that, however, you cannot sent private messages without being a member. And it's relatively stupid to discuss personal matters in public threads.

Get a MySpace account. Tom will be your friend.

A couple of points...

First, not everyone is a social butterfly who gets along or likes a ton of people. Some of us are simply unique in a way that differentiates us from 95% of the population. That's not to say we are weird or geeks or any other negative connotation. We are simply a minority of the social genre. We are also the people that tend to have life-long friends regardless of distance, time or any other factor.

How many of those social butterflies on Facebook/twitter/whatever have a friend they could call on for absolutely anything without question? I'd bet you'd find alot of them answering "not me."

Second, part of the reason you aren't making friends is you aren't accepting yourself. The fact that you are worried about not having friends is going to project an image whether you realize it or not. That image is going to be picked up on by other people who will treat is as a reason to avoid you. So what can you do? Be comfortable with yourself and know yourself. Yes in the zen kind of bullshit way, but also in the way of not caring how many friends you have but simply being happy whether you are alone or with others. Once you are happy with yourself in any situation, people will begin to gravitate towards you.

Third, people mention hobbies, but don't start a hobby just to make friends. It's like lying to them right off the bat. Take up hobbies because YOU enjoy them, and then find groups to share that with. Then you come to the table with genuine self-confidence and happiness and people will respond to that.

Last, you sound slightly narcissistic. Perhaps you are simply not allowing people who could be your friends into your life because you are judging them before giving them a chance.

One final thought: Try this little social experiment. The next time you are somewhere public with other people, standing in line for a coffee or something, put your phone in your pocket/purse and strike up a conversation with the person next to you. You will be surprised how people will suddenly remember how to interact without texting. I do it all the time and it's a great source of joy in my life when I meet a new person and have a good conversation. 90% of the time I don't walk away with a new friend because that was never the intent anyway. It's really about reconnecting with people.

Best of luck! :)

I'll be your friend OP

Sometimes having friends is not worth the effort.

I've had better internet friends than real friends. All my "real" friends used to use me for selfish purposes. At least when you communicate over the Internet with people from other states or even countries, they can't use you for anything. I do miss affection, or the feigning of affection sometimes, though.

^^^

This.

do you have pets? are you a musician?

It's easy to find friends. Just join a pool league or something else you're interested in. Easy. You'll all have something in common.

you may be karmacly sheathed

You don't have because you don't ask.

The way you described yourself is merely a state of being.

It is stating what you want to other and, while being polite and gracious, not compromising on that.

Now stop feeling sorry for yourself. There are nearly 7 BILLION PEOPLE ON THIS PLANT. Are you willing to go through 100 people to find the one who appreciates you? How about 1,000? How about more?

Jesus, perfect as he was, only had 12 disciples--3 of which were his close friends. And, even they abandoned him when the SHTF.

Take stock in yourself and what you want. Set your goals and expectations realistically and then make things happen. You'll be better, and happier, for it.

I only have two friends and they aren't that great of friends.
I need to meet a new circle of people.
hang in there OP, your not alone!

We all have a friend in Jesus. You may not know Him, but He knows YOU. Consider Him a long lost friend who is longing for you to call Him.

You may claim Jesus as your friend.

But,

Will he claim you as his friend? That's the real question now, isn't it?

Judgment is a comin!

If you make the call, He will. :)

Have you seen that Seinfeld episode where Jerry talks about ‘No Vacancy’?

That’s you.

It’s easy to make friends when you are a kid. Harder when you are an adult because people have ‘No Vacancy’ for the very reason you mentioned : ‘No time!’

They have jobs & families and a few friends from their younger days. Their schedule is ‘Full’ .

I can relate. Especially being that the more you know, the more isolated you become. So finding people to relate to gets harder and people get more and more disconnected. I don't know anyone either. I can't talk to people about things of importance because it's not mainstream and i don't watch tv. Communication, ironically has broken down because of the very technology to simplify it- because of the trite banter on public forums like facebook and the txt message. No on has any meaningful communication with others or even hears the human voice anymore. You are not alone. I mean that in every way possible; you are not alone.

Let me guess you live in Sydney or Melbourne? It's hard living in a city tho there are lots of ppl its a dog eat sog world. You'll find small town people are much nicer I live in the Gold Coast and I find though its still busy people are much nicer than in Sydney. My sister lives in Sydney and has the same problem as you.

People are just consumers.

I'm your friend!

I missed having good buddies when I was younger. Just like you now, OP. Not so much anymore, I dedicate most of my time to study and spending time in nature with my pets. People are just to consumed with trifles I don't want to have anything with, such a waste of energy trying to open their eyes to better stuff in life... Well, whatever you do, good luck!

GLPers are the only people I get along with

If it makes you feel any better I deleted my Facebook like 10 months ago and trashed everyone I knew. I kept a few close friends, but they are turning out not who they claim to be.
Basically, I'm alone now.

I have bad luck with friends. They are either dicks to me or we have no common interests. F them, I've decided it's time I become a friend to myself.

Friendship is overrated.

I'm in the same situation, OP. But I'm not worried about it. I quite like my solitude. If I feel the need to talk to someone, I go online and have a chat with a stranger.

you can talk to me I have a lot friends you're welcome anytime you want, bye belgium!

Cya!

Hehe, thanks a lot. If you wanna talk, that is not a problem, from nutcase to nutcase. ;)

It's destiny.

I met quite a few decent folks over the year who are lonesome as hell, probably even more than I am.

The funny thing is being of the same kind didn't bring us any closer. We all have our own loneliness to deal with...