Who else 'views-their-poo' before flushing it away? | |
#Geomagnetic_Storm# User ID: 1426914 United States 01/03/2013 04:54 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2230505 United States 01/03/2013 05:10 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Muffinheadicus User ID: 15215384 United States 01/03/2013 05:14 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 31203914 United Kingdom 01/03/2013 06:03 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1397422 Canada 01/05/2013 01:31 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 31445522 United States 01/05/2013 01:38 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 13965421 Canada 01/05/2013 01:52 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 18635652 Canada 01/15/2013 02:24 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 34256857 Canada 02/13/2013 02:02 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 35129088 Canada 02/25/2013 03:44 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
sky11 User ID: 32380259 United States 02/25/2013 05:22 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Got to make sure it's not camera worthy before I flush The old law about an eye for an eye leaves everybody blind. -- Martin Luther King Jr. If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. -- Abraham Maslow We fear what we don't understand. -- Aesop |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 27657313 New Zealand 02/25/2013 05:28 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2308971 United Kingdom 02/25/2013 05:31 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
sky11 User ID: 32380259 United States 02/25/2013 05:35 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | DO NOT EAT PRINGLES FAT FREE POTATO CHIPS. THEY WILL GREASE YOUR ASS. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1332959 Don't even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can't eat them very much or I'll get fat. I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck. The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you... Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope ...is that the primary ingredient is something called "olean" which I have since learned is Latin for "Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease." Oh Yeah. I'm not even kidding. So today, while I'm standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow. Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes shitting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I'm telling you. THAT's how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the fuck?! What if I'd gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then? So I walk carefully to the bathroom and disrobe. before I even sit on the toilet, I wad paper and carefully wipe from the front. Sure enough, it was light brown, and had the texture of soft spackle. You fucking Pringle bastards. I sat down and pushed a bit, and lo, out came a jet that I didnt even feel an urge for one minute earlier. It piled in the bowl like brown marshmallow fluff. The problem rose when I tried to wipe. I went through a whole fucking roll of TP and could not get it all off me. So. I jumped in the shower. Yep, its gross, but it had to be done. There I stood, water pouring down, cheeks spread, and using my own hand to make certain I'm clean. That was when I discovered that after using my hand to wipe myself (before I soaped the area) my hand came back covered in some sort of transparent grease. It was so fucking foul. The grease made water bead off my hand. It was tacky too, and very difficult to manage. So I grabbed the bar of saop and went to work. You fucking Pringle bastards. The bar of soap came away coated in grease as well, and would no longer wash. I had to turn the water to hot and massage the soap for five minutes to get it to the point where I could use it again. It took me an hour to get the fucking grease off my pucker. I shudder to think of what its doing INSIDE ME right now, but I will damned sure never eat that shit again. Fucking Pringle bastards. This is where the joke about "anal leakage" came from. its real. Fuck Pringles. OMG I can not stop laughing. I am crying from laughing so hard. The old law about an eye for an eye leaves everybody blind. -- Martin Luther King Jr. If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. -- Abraham Maslow We fear what we don't understand. -- Aesop |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 7977928 Canada 03/12/2013 02:59 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 31445522 United States 03/12/2013 03:03 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | It was enough blood that I thought I was having a miscarriage or something when I looked but upon further investigation it was the wrong hole. Fucking scary shit. (No pun intended) So now I'm anal about checking (again, no pun intended) |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 37774575 Canada 04/10/2013 12:43 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 41731201 United States 06/15/2013 02:09 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 45278750 Canada 08/17/2013 02:07 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 39812333 United States 08/17/2013 02:59 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Do you look at the toilet paper everytime you wipe? Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1317394Yep! Have you ever been too lazy too wipe so jumped in the shower instead? Unlike you dirty westerners... here in Asia we have 'BUM GUNS' fitted by the toilet. Spread legs. Aim. Shoot. Left hand swishes. Wash hands. SQUEEKY CLEAN ANUS. Could eat your dinner off it. Someone order the poo-poo platter? |
Manu-Koelbren User ID: 31976657 Spain 08/17/2013 03:00 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I don't. Banned as usual. “It is far easier to be a weakling than to be a Real Man. Were the Earth less harsh or the circumstances of life less austere, man would destroy himself before the shrine of the languid goddess. Only Real Men can with safety destroy the tangled forests and wilderness of Earth and make from them gardens, but will those who inherit the gardens be Real Men? The law decrees that they must be, or the wilderness will reclaim its own.” |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 11873420 Canada 09/17/2013 01:53 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 47076655 Canada 09/19/2013 03:48 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Stickywicket User ID: 18768705 Canada 09/19/2013 03:55 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 20684458 United Kingdom 09/19/2013 04:03 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous coward User ID: 1408355 Australia 09/19/2013 04:21 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
attila User ID: 2215239 France 09/19/2013 05:27 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 20684458 United Kingdom 09/19/2013 05:38 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | And there I was last night thinking "where are all the poop threads?" and as if by magic, two appear. Clearly I'm creating my own reality here. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 20684458 Yes sucks that eh? Well that's really going to wow the girls, isn't it? "I can create GLP poop threads just by thinking of them" "oh wow baby, anything else?" "nope" |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 44115606 United States 09/19/2013 06:12 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous coward User ID: 1408355 Australia 09/19/2013 06:21 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | And there I was last night thinking "where are all the poop threads?" and as if by magic, two appear. Clearly I'm creating my own reality here. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 20684458 Yes sucks that eh? Well that's really going to wow the girls, isn't it? "I can create GLP poop threads just by thinking of them" "oh wow baby, anything else?" "nope" You just got to concentrate. I have faith in you. |