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33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?

 
Chris Jusset

User ID: 1202409
United States
05/27/2011 10:17 PM

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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I'm 33 and divorced from a BPD woman
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1078814


BPD = Borderline Personality Disorder?
 Quoting: Chris Jusset


BPD = Bi-Polar Disorder
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1324396
United States
05/27/2011 10:19 PM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
No you are fine. Do you want kids? If so go get one from africa.

You might be here not to have kids...

Kids IMO = karma

you might not want that karma on a deep level

-peace
GodisWaiting4U
Ojos Abiertos...

User ID: 1303566
United States
05/27/2011 10:58 PM

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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I give you three perfect examples of how three different lives can deal with relationships:

My sisters and I were born a year apart.

I'm 37, will be married 12 years come Sunday to my fellow artist/college sweetheart husband 8-), w/two boys ages 6 & 3. We are a Christian family but we're not perfect. With my health issues, 3 yr old with autism and one income, it has been VERY difficult the past 6-7 years...basically since we had children. But hubbie and I are very blessed. If you put God ahead of your marriage and family, He will keep it together for you hf

My middle sister, 36, living with her on-again, off-again boyfriend of 8 years, who's 5 years younger than her. No kids, subject of marriage comes up and brings massive tension. She's a hairdresser with a great career, he works part-time for his brother in a flower shop but has no motivation to get a full time job, no plans for wedding, nothing. Both Catholic but are "lost" in a sense to where they are with God. They are basically in limbo about their future.

My youngest sister, 35, got married same year I did, found out her high school sweetheart husband had a year long affair after almost 6 years of marriage, WHILE SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH THEIR FIRST CHILD. Divorced confirmed after her son turned six months old. Moved back with my parents for two years, met a man through her job, also divorced w/a daughter. Fell in love and got remarried. Two years later...she's now 5 months pregnant w/a girl, 6 year old son and 11 year old stepdaughter. Brother-in-law is very nice...Catholic-raised man. They also adopted a bulldog puppy and are renovating their house to make room for growing family.

IMAGINE OUR CONVERSATIONS TOGETHER!!!

How do we relate to each other? I can only understand where my sisters come from but it's hard to imagine being in their shoes now. I know marriage and/or children is not for everyone. If you are curious to know the Biblical view of marriage and being single, please read first book of Corinthians chapter 7 here : [link to www.blueletterbible.org] I can't tell my sisters what to do but I can only advise them to do right by God.

To answer your question, no there is nothing wrong with being single at 33 or any age but to lead a life that doesn't mesh with how God intended it for a single/married person, it could hurt you and others involved with you in the long run. Companionship is great but it's difficult when intimacy sets in. Just an FYI and posting to bring up another POV...not telling you how to live your life...I hope you are truly happy with where you're at...peace hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1322883
United States
05/28/2011 12:25 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
You ever think this NWO thing has you all conditioned to think it's best to be "free". Derp..."live for one". Break apart families/communities and bonds with others.

Sad you may never have the loving relationship some do experience, really. But hey, to each his own.
 Quoting: ItsPat



I agree. People that live alone, die alone...your good, just as long as you don't get sick or old....in which either one will inevitably happen... they are screwed...too many people live for themselves for today...we all have had bad experiences....doesnt mean u give up....
Mr. X
User ID: 1402074
United States
05/28/2011 12:31 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Being single is great for a while but as you get older and look back in a "what if" sort of way... you might regret not having someone hog half the bed, or little brats looking up to you and asking all sorts of questions, or having someone grow old with you and be your best friend, partner, lover and supporter.

A friend asked me a while back, "then what's your purpose for living, who are you living for and why do you make the effort to do better for yourself?"

the time to have kids or seek a partner is limited. your looks could fade, your health could fade and you only have right now to do this.

Think of yourself at 66...now look back at a life of no love, no kids and no partner. how do you feel about that?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1190583


You make many good points. I've spent a lot of time with bedridden seniors, and heard many sad stories of men (and women, though mostly men) who refused to settle down...and paid the price.

Eighty-five years old, totally single for 20 years, no kids, basically no family, and few friends. It is SO sad.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 905363




I can tell you about just as many seniors whos family abandon them and toss them in an old people prison of a home, and dont see them again until the funeral and time to split up the estate.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 975627
United States
05/28/2011 12:37 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
right on.. the illusion is failing.. marriage and kids = what you were SUPPOSE to do.. what we have been conditioned to believe is the thing to do..

im 28.. refuse to get married, and will NOT have kids
 Quoting: DIGITAL



Wow, what if your parents had that attitude before you came along.....hmmmmm.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1403847
United States
05/28/2011 12:40 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Nothing's wrong with you, you're just lucky.
General Troll, US Shillitary

User ID: 964969
United States
05/28/2011 12:45 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
It kind of boils down to if you are selfish/lazy or not. If you want to make somebody else happy in the long term, and reap the benefits of them returning that behavior, then find a partner for life and try to make it work.

Any serious relationship takes hard work, compromise, and sacrifice. In today's world of instant gratification, people have grand illusions of getting married and living happily ever after, and when they encounter their first serious problem that can't be solved in a short period of time, they abandon ship.

Sure, there is a time to explore, but there is also a time to make a decision and stick with it, for better or worse.

Sometimes, even after committing to a relationship and trying your absolute best to make it succeed, it might fail for reasons beyond anybody's control. Don't let that discourage you from trying to commit when you are ready.

"A young man who is not a liberal has no heart. An old man who is not a conservative, has no head." - Ben Franklin

^^this^^ is mainly applied to politics, but I think that it sort of applies to relationships as well.

Good luck OP.
"What you have just said, is the most insanely idiotic thing I have ever heard. At no point, in your rambling incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul."
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 975627
United States
05/28/2011 12:50 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Definitely not ! I think it's the best choice I've made

Most of my married friends (if I ever get to see them) look like they're ready to kill themselves in a cycle of routine

could have married when I was 26, but didnt really see it as any benefit to me other than a legally binding contract that has no terms but definite financial consequences if the contract is broken

what schmuck would sign this?

you have one kid, two...then you're pretty much expendable...the woman could pretty much just take off and you'll still have to pay her regardless, and this I've seen happen a few times and it appears to be a cruel punishment

probably most importantly, what always bothered me the most about a girlfriend or a 'serious relationship' is that I knew I wouldn't be able to enjoy other women unless I cheated, which kind of counters the whole idea anyways

Life's pretty exciting for me...I can do what I want and go anywhere I want, and If I want female company, I can have that too, and someone different each time, and really the less committed you are to relationships the more women want you..it's really fucked up

lastly, I couldn't bear having a kid and offering it to the altar of the NWo by shipping the kid to daycare

how can any parent counter this and work a job at the same time, unless you're rich? no thanks

so really, why would a man choose to get married when you have hot little 21 year olds about that just want to party if you're nice to them?

someone enlighten me on the benefits, please
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1262006



Sounds more, to me, like you're trying to convince yourself that you're happier being lonely..... and yes you are lonely. Those "hot" little 21 year-olds can only provide temporary companionship at best. You'll never have someone to know you intimately....who you are deep down. It will always be superficial.

---nobody to TRULY share in your accomplishments. Nobody to TRULY care about what's going on in your life... Nobody to be TRULY intimate with.... Man, I feel sorry for you.

Those married friends of yours who look like they're ready to kill themselves....yeah, marriage and kids is a tough road, but it's part of the experience of something we call LIFE.

You ask any of them if they would change anything about their lives that would alter the family they have now, and I promise you not one of them would.

So, yes, I think there is something wrong with you. You're selfish. That's it. Were you an only-child?

Seriously, try not to be so self-centered and maybe you'll find a decent woman to love you the way a woman is designed to love a man.
Mr. X
User ID: 1402074
United States
05/28/2011 12:52 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Dont pay any attention to these people telling you you will get married and grow old with a woman like something from On Golden Pond.




^ this is a BS fantasy.




This is something to scare you into getting married.


Here is Reality; 50% of marriages end in a divorce.



And, for every person on here screaming that they take care of their elderly relatives.


I have been in numerous nursing homes, that are really sad places, with NO ONE coming to visit any elederly resident.

You think it's because they all spent their life partying, and didnt raise a family????


Or is it because all these people screaming how they love to care for their elderly relatives, in reality, when the time comes they put the elderly relative in a home because they dont want to have to deal with it. And, then they dont see them again until the funeral.


Don't believe me?? Call around, offer to volunteer in a senior citizens home.

Spend a few days volunteering in different senior citizen homes.


You will see how the forgotten elderly get treated.


They arent living "on Golden Pond"

That's reality.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1154162
United States
05/28/2011 01:08 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
38 years old here. Single, never married, no kids, $75K job, high-yield investments slowly building up a nice secondary income stream.

I never wanted kids, and marriage is a sucker's bet for man in that case.

I'd have it made if not for this damned social anxiety disorder with avoidance as a primary coping mechanism. I just passed four years of mostly involuntary celibacy and this is not my longest dry spell either.

I might just start seeing escorts twice a month and give up on trying to meet civilian women.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1136686


LOL

You so want a family but you can't tear yourself away from your cave without breaking into cold sweats!

Go get herpes from a hooker you pussy canuck!
Jack Tripper

User ID: 1032222
United States
05/28/2011 01:09 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
You should be planting your genes like Johnny Appleseed.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1300003
United States
05/28/2011 01:30 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
old chinese proverb say you ugly you get no sex you have no kids
females must find you unattractive and or a fruit cake
Debauchery

User ID: 1201998
United States
05/28/2011 01:31 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Being single is wonderful.

I was married..divorced now. It's like I can breathe again.

I do have children..I'm happy with my decision to have them, they make my life much better, I just can't imagine being married again..even to the best man in the world. I like being alone, I find it much more fulfilling than partnering up. Maybe I'm just a freak of nature.

I say do what makes you feel good as long as it hurts no one. Not all of us are cut out for the married life..and some don't want children. Nothing wrong with that at all.
And the LORD spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it." Amen.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1249032
United States
05/28/2011 01:35 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
to many people having to many kids. this system can no longer support such a population.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1402916
Spain
05/28/2011 01:44 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
There's no reason to rush into marriage but you should at least have a girlfriend. Otherwise, people might start thinking you're a homosexual.
 Quoting: Guns n' God (redux)


HOW horrifically ironic from an avatar of your's: [link to www.google.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1317267
United States
05/28/2011 01:49 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I saw this economic mess coming 300 miles away.

And I had to make some sudden changes in course. As in "we're taking off sweetheart and I don't have time to debate it in committee".

It's easier to do things, if you don't have to argue or justify yourself to someone else.

I know. I KNOW that I would still have a mortgage 'round my neck if I was married. Probably be just like all those others fighting the banks over the mortgage note.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1369241
United States
05/28/2011 01:57 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
you're sane. congratulations!!
WeAreSlaves
maxemo.com

User ID: 1391326
Canada
05/28/2011 01:57 AM

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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
to many people having to many kids. this system can no longer support such a population.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1249032


bsflag


If the Elite didnt steal most of the wealth/resources, there would be MORE than enough for everyone.
Warning : The post above may be pure speculation.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1403674
United States
05/28/2011 02:17 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Definitely not ! I think it's the best choice I've made

Most of my married friends (if I ever get to see them) look like they're ready to kill themselves in a cycle of routine

could have married when I was 26, but didnt really see it as any benefit to me other than a legally binding contract that has no terms but definite financial consequences if the contract is broken

what schmuck would sign this?

you have one kid, two...then you're pretty much expendable...the woman could pretty much just take off and you'll still have to pay her regardless, and this I've seen happen a few times and it appears to be a cruel punishment

probably most importantly, what always bothered me the most about a girlfriend or a 'serious relationship' is that I knew I wouldn't be able to enjoy other women unless I cheated, which kind of counters the whole idea anyways

Life's pretty exciting for me...I can do what I want and go anywhere I want, and If I want female company, I can have that too, and someone different each time, and really the less committed you are to relationships the more women want you..it's really fucked up

lastly, I couldn't bear having a kid and offering it to the altar of the NWo by shipping the kid to daycare

how can any parent counter this and work a job at the same time, unless you're rich? no thanks

so really, why would a man choose to get married when you have hot little 21 year olds about that just want to party if you're nice to them?

someone enlighten me on the benefits, please
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1262006


The fact that your asking questions means that you have two problems.

1. The media psyops are fucking with your mind to make you feel like a outcast for not being married.

2. Your animal instinct to reproduce is kicking it. That will only get worse as you grow older until you knock up at least one woman.
StrataFire

User ID: 292694
United States
05/28/2011 02:26 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
47 years old (going on 48) and have absolutely no desire to become another statistic in the game of marriage..

I can screw anything from 18 (have and do) on up, as I made sure I was "fixed" (snip, snip) and have no concern with "unintended" accidents..

The younger (18+) are better, lots to teach, and play with, when I want to do more then screw, and throw away, I tend to up my age scale to 21-30, young enough to be "tight" and old enough to have a meaningful conversation..

All women want two things, money, and "things", you wave a couple of grand in any womans face, and she will spread like the whore she is.. (works every time)..

Go to the bank, and when you ask for a balance check, the eyes of the young attractive clerk "light up" and she goes into the standard routine of "Me and my girlfriend are going to the beach/movie/bar/club/etc"..

Which I simply nod, be polite, and figure for just how long I want to deal with this chick (if at all).. but I tend not to "shit", where I sleep (as it goes) .. so I leave them alone..

All women are whores, its an "inbreeding" thing with them.. they all want money, they all want "things", and they all will screw you (literally and figuratively)..

I have gotten women to leave their men they are married to, just to see if it was money, or something else (its money as constant)..

Should I ever make the stupid mistake of getting married, I would have an iron clad Prenuptial agreement in place, she doesn't want to sign it? I would tell her to get the "F" out and don't let the door hit her in the ass on the way out..

Your doing fine, smart (IMO), and your going to have a life of many opportunities without some whore dragging you down..

Last Edited by StrataFire on 05/28/2011 02:33 AM
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1124174
United States
05/28/2011 02:38 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
47 years old (going on 48) and have absolutely no desire to become another statistic in the game of marriage..

I can screw anything from 18 (have and do) on up, as I made sure I was "fixed" (snip, snip) and have no concern with "unintended" accidents..

The younger (18+) are better, lots to teach, and play with, when I want to do more then screw, and throw away, I tend to up my age scale to 21-30, young enough to be "tight" and old enough to have a meaningful conversation..

All women want two things, money, and "things", you wave a couple of grand in any womans face, and she will spread like the whore she is.. (works every time)..

Go to the bank, and when you ask for a balance check, the eyes of the young attractive clerk "light up" and she goes into the standard routine of "Me and my girlfriend are going to the beach/movie/bar/club/etc"..

Which I simply nod, be polite, and figure for just how long I want to deal with this chick (if at all).. but I tend not to "shit", where I sleep (as it goes) .. so I leave them alone..

All women are whores, its an "inbreeding" thing with them.. they all want money, they all want "things", and they all will screw you (literally and figuratively)..

I have gotten women to leave their men they are married to, just to see if it was money, or something else (its money as constant)..

Should I ever make the stupid mistake of getting married, I would have an iron clad Prenuptial agreement in place, she doesn't want to sign it? I would tell her to get the "F" out and don't let the door hit her in the ass on the way out..

Your doing fine, smart (IMO), and your going to have a life of many opportunities without some whore dragging you down..
 Quoting: StrataFire




WOW you embody me exactly.... Seriously man. I feel the same way. Especially the last part about the pre nup. NO way in hell would i get married now adays with out one of those. bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1225688
Finland
05/28/2011 02:44 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I got married a bit too early, felt I had missed something, marriage fell apart ...

talking with my adult children, strange thing is, that it's like this Western porno slut consumerist hedonist culture that's been pushed on people is getting too transparent and ridiculous ... some young peoiple are rebelling against it by getting married ... they don't feel they are missing anything ...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1404060
United States
05/28/2011 02:46 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Good! Stay single and use a rubber.
Please don't breed, we have enough self centered, immature boy-men in the world already.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1402408


THIS!
cruise
gebahie

User ID: 1302693
United States
05/28/2011 02:53 AM

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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
To each their own but I love being married.I love falling asleep/waking up to my best friend every single day.I love being taken care of & I love taking care of him.There's just something really amazing that one can only feel from being married.Plus it's really great to have someone tell you they love you.You don't get love by sleeping around.I can only imagine how lonely it must get at times.

As for children...I have 2.Absolutely the best thing I've ever done in my entire life.Waking up & seeing their faces light up when they see me,hearing their little laughs & getting those slobbery wet kisses.That to me is everything.

I really do wish you the best with your staying single/childless.I hope you won't wake up one day and regret anything.Sure takes a very strong person to go through with that.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1403749


Not married.. Im 35 Looking at the planet today why will I bring a child to this slavery and harsh world not cool. Glad it worked out for ya but at the rate we are going your happiness is going to be short lived enjoy.
Veggie Man
User ID: 1404079
United States
05/28/2011 03:09 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Maybe there are other, more important things in store for you - one need not sire a child to be a father. :o)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 769657
United States
05/28/2011 03:12 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I'm 41 and never have been married or wanted to and no kids. Now I have an urge to have a kid because I just turned 41 and though I'm fairly healthy, i think it's just he "store closing".

I can always adopt, but I hate drama and want only peace joy and fun.

It's great that no one has ever controlled me, hit me, made me miserable because I think being alone is more honest then always having to cling to someone to rely on them to make you happy.
troydungeon

User ID: 1386438
United States
05/28/2011 03:16 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
[link to www.finallyexposed.com]
ThePaleOne

User ID: 331367
Austria
05/28/2011 03:37 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
Hell yeah.

34 and i can see the shit all my friends stepped into by following the "established" way of marry, kids, home (that belongs to the bank) and nice Audi in the garage (that belongs to another bank).

Not to mention 50K kitchens (for the female part to boast), the obvious pool in the garden and the "exotic" sommer holiday.

They all are broke at best, broke plus if divorced.

And their women NEVER are satisfied.

Oh two kids .. i can´t make a career !
Oh my career is great but i can not have another kid !
Constant whining because of unability to fit the advert "world" of expectations.

Well .. i was born poor and ugly which led to no relationships in my youth.


Now .. as i spent my time not wasted on pussy on work, making money, have a big house (5500 sqft living space, that´s without man cave, garage ..) and lot´s of man toys in the garage, all set in an really nice park landscape and all is paid for full...

Chicks dig me, even wannabe mothers in law dig me .. even though i am not only ugly as ever but also fattened up and get bald.

Imagine that.


nope .. all whomen are greedy whores and today my time is way too precious
to deal with all that femals BS .. why own the cow when you can buy the milk anytime you want ?
Heisenberg may have been here !
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1342814
Switzerland
05/28/2011 03:44 AM
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Re: 33 and single, no kids...is something wrong with me?
I know many people at 66 who would do anything to be able to separate from their spouse. Many do and end up in worse shape than never marrying at all.

Marriage is not some kind of guarantee against loneliness.

thing of it is this: Feminism changed gender relationships radically. Women foolishly believed that they could gain rights (at the expense of men) without having a change in behavior and attitude from men. Men also liberated themselves. They liberated themselves from the traditional responsibilities towards women. They no longer are required to marry, to procreate, or even to treat women with the kind of respect they expected in a traditional environment. These attitudes will absolutely continue. Women gained nothing through Feminism, if anything they lost a great deal. They are now something like prostitutes where they were once wives and mothers.


Being single is great for a while but as you get older and look back in a "what if" sort of way... you might regret not having someone hog half the bed, or little brats looking up to you and asking all sorts of questions, or having someone grow old with you and be your best friend, partner, lover and supporter.

A friend asked me a while back, "then what's your purpose for living, who are you living for and why do you make the effort to do better for yourself?"

the time to have kids or seek a partner is limited. your looks could fade, your health could fade and you only have right now to do this.

Think of yourself at 66...now look back at a life of no love, no kids and no partner. how do you feel about that?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1190583

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