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Poster Handle JamesBe1
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I've been learning about mk, monarch, and satanic ritual abuse for over a year now. I am by no means an expert on the subjects but I wanted to share a bit of what I've experienced.
I'm not sure if it matters, but I am an only child born in the 80's to middle class parents who divorced when I was 6. I have always been told I'm "special" by not only my family but
family friends, teachers and whatnot. But I never put too much thought into it because I assume every child gets fawned over by their family. However, deep down I've always believed I am different, no better or worse than most people- just different.
As I grew up I faced a lot of crap, and strange occurrences. I won't get into details but they range from being stalked to being molested, to participating in countless out of classroom testing in elementary all through to highschool.

In anycase, I no idea about mk and monarch until I started reading this thread last summer:
<link> Thread: I was ritually abused and mind controlled as a child - ask me a question

I was completely blown away when I started reading it, I only got maybe half way through when I decided to go to sleep and take a rest from all this new information. It was about 11PM when I got into bed and I had the most intense disturbing feeling. As if my mind was open for others to enter. I can't even explain it. It just felt like eyes were looking into me and I was helpless to stop them. I almost immediately fell asleep however, and began dreaming. All I remember of the dream was being in the back of a vehicle in a daze and having this ominous voice telling me to forget everything.
I jolted awake literally soaked in sweat. When I turned on the light I had these red bruises on my legs and when I took a look at the time it was only 12:30. I called my then boyfriend frantically and he basically told me I was nuts and hung up on me.

I still don't know what to believe about that particular night, but I've become more aware of mind control and I have even taken many people out of my life that I realized were manipulating me. Just like the OP I have many questions and few answers, but I am so grateful for everyone sharing experiences and information as it gives more pieces to the puzzle.
The only insight I can share is that my first step to feeling free was just being aware of how fragile the human mind is. My entire perspective on the world has changed and I'm beginning to see through some of the smoke.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1431477

I am sorry to hear about your situation AC. It certainly appears to be something that you need to explore much further. There are some reputable therapists who can help you re-integrate if you have been tampered with (for lack of a better term). You have to be careful with regards to selecting a therapist. Many appear to be co-opted by the MKUltra program. Your best bet would be too ask questions on some of the boards that deal with victims. There are many victims (too many), and they are finally starting to find each other and help each other heal.

Don't expect it to be an easy process. Many memories you almost assuredly don't want to get back, and success is not assured. Still, hope is never lost. Ever!

Eventually, those that commit these crimes will be exposed, and their victims will be recognised and helped. Their days are numbered.

But whatever happens, don't stop asking questions. Don't stop seeking the truth.

Also, I remember that thread, and there was a great deal of good and bad information there. Sure there were shills, but there were also real victims there too (imho). Read it carefully, and decide for yourself. Some of the folks there can probably point you in the right direction.
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