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*** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***

 
Silent Wind
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*** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
PASADENA, CA—Groundbreaking new findings announced Monday suggest the record-setting heat wave plaguing much of the United States may be due to radiation emitted from an enormous star located in the center of the solar system.

Scientists believe the star, which they have named G2V65, may in fact be the same bright yellow orb seen arcing over the sky day after day, and given its extreme heat and proximity to Earth, it is likely not only to have caused the heat wave, but to be responsible for every warm day in human history.

"Our measurements indicate the massive amount of energy this thing gives off is able to travel 93 million miles and reach our planet is as little as eight and a half minutes," said Professor Mitch Kivens, an astronomer at the California Institute of Technology. "While we can't see them, we're fairly certain these infrared rays strike Earth's surface, become trapped by the atmosphere, and just heat everything up like a great big oven."

Read more: [link to www.theonion.com]
Comforting the disturbed and disturbing the comfortable.

"So long as it harms no other, do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law"
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 09:52 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
aloneahhh
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 09:55 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
lmao
the onion!
You really take this seriously?
sbus
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08/08/2011 09:56 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
1rof1
500 Billion Galaxies in the observable universe. 100 Trillion stars in the Milky way. 50 Million potentially habitable planets in the Milky Way. And you're telling me ETs don't exist?
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:00 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
PASADENA, CA—Groundbreaking new findings announced Monday suggest the record-setting heat wave plaguing much of the United States may be due to radiation emitted from an enormous star located in the center of the solar system.

Scientists believe the star, which they have named G2V65, may in fact be the same bright yellow orb seen arcing over the sky day after day, and given its extreme heat and proximity to Earth, it is likely not only to have caused the heat wave, but to be responsible for every warm day in human history.

"Our measurements indicate the massive amount of energy this thing gives off is able to travel 93 million miles and reach our planet is as little as eight and a half minutes," said Professor Mitch Kivens, an astronomer at the California Institute of Technology. "While we can't see them, we're fairly certain these infrared rays strike Earth's surface, become trapped by the atmosphere, and just heat everything up like a great big oven."

Read more: [link to www.theonion.com]
 Quoting: Silent Wind


Then why has it been so mild in the Western states? Sucking our heat over to this region?
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:04 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
Wow, who woulda thunk it
Silent Wind (OP)

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08/08/2011 10:04 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
Suckers!!!!

lolroflsheep

Last Edited by Silent Wind on 08/08/2011 10:05 PM
Comforting the disturbed and disturbing the comfortable.

"So long as it harms no other, do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law"
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:06 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
GOOD UN FARTFACE
Gloomy

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08/08/2011 10:06 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
I had to read this twice before I realized they said the star at the center of our solar system... I thought it said at the center of our galaxy at first.

Last Edited by Archangel Raphael on 08/08/2011 10:08 PM
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:07 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
Suckers!!!!

lolroflsheep
 Quoting: Silent Wind


op trying to cover up cuz he believed the onion. good try
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:08 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
no no

this is the answer to the missing ribbon
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 10:09 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
op trying to cover up cuz he believed the onion. good try
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1495404


I seriously doubt that's the case.. probably just seeing who he could catch lol
GenieRoze

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08/08/2011 10:17 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
It's the Onion people, satire....sheesh
Anonymous Coward
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08/08/2011 11:10 PM
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Re: *** Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System ***
PASADENA, CA—Groundbreaking new findings announced Monday suggest the record-setting heat wave plaguing much of the United States may be due to radiation emitted from an enormous star located in the center of the solar system.

 Quoting: Silent Wind


Oh so THAT'S what that bright yellow orb is that sets every night and rises everyday...i believe i heard people call it THE SUN

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