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Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?

 
Barbie Chaos
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User ID: 1099719
Puerto Rico
09/07/2011 01:17 AM
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Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Why?

He loves me and all but he doesn't make biscuits. Why?

Is there something wrong with him?
Vegetable season
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1537544
United States
09/07/2011 01:18 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
My cat made mulberry pancakes for me on Sunday. Picked the mulberries herself.
Paddy

User ID: 1381052
United States
09/07/2011 01:24 AM

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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Oh my God. Cats like cornbread not biscuits.
The Monk
User ID: 1388350
United States
09/07/2011 01:24 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Why?

He loves me and all but he doesn't make biscuits. Why?

Is there something wrong with him?
 Quoting: Barbie Chaos



My grandaddy called biscuits "catheads"...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1138061
United States
09/07/2011 01:25 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Cats don't make biscuits, they make muffins. Unless they're from the South, then they make dumplings.
Doomish
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User ID: 1530222
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09/07/2011 01:26 AM

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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Why?

He loves me and all but he doesn't make biscuits. Why?

Is there something wrong with him?
 Quoting: Barbie Chaos


I had a friend whose cat always made biscuits.

But my cat never did. 12 years and no biscuits.

But she still loved me. hf

Last Edited by Doomish on 09/07/2011 01:26 AM
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Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1538397
Australia
09/07/2011 01:29 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
My cat doesnt make biscuits either, nor will she mow the lawn..I rang the UN to complain and they muttered sumpin about Libya and hung up on me...WTF is that all about, I arks you?
Electric Moon

User ID: 1524351
United States
09/07/2011 03:01 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Some cats just don't knead. I have eight cats, and half of them don't make biscuits at all. But they're still affectionate cats who obviously like having me around (and not just for my can- and door-opening skills).

It's kind of nice, having a bunch of non-kneaders because the ones who do it are just crazy-insistent about it. As soon as I sit on the couch, it's like OMG WE LOVE YOU LET US KNEAD YOUUUUUU!!!1!! One of them is an obsessive licker, as well. I have some mild sensory processing issues, and on a bad day can go into complete Brain Overload with too much of certain types of physical stimuli--and unfortunately getting kneaded will do it.

And now I remember how an old boyfriend used to swear that the cats weren't really kneading biscuits as a display of affection. Instead, they were tenderizing me so I'd be more palatable... rofl
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1538249
United States
09/07/2011 03:02 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
My cat did not make biscuits, or pankaces, or dumplings,or corn muffins but she suuuuure make good bread.
When she got done baking the bread, she went out and brought me a field mouse to go with the bread. Hhhhhmmmmmm hhhhmmmmmm hhhhmmmmm
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1538458
United States
09/07/2011 03:08 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
my cat was laid off at her mousing job and just doesn't have any dough.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1520186
United States
09/07/2011 03:13 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
The problem here is welfare.

These cats just think they can sit around and lick their paws while we do all the work and pay for their food.

If we cut off that welfare, they'd get off their furry butts and start making biscuits.

This is why socialism will never work.
BigDog10000000000000

User ID: 1273491
United States
09/07/2011 03:15 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
www80www144www140www143
BigDog
Barbie Chaos (OP)

User ID: 1099719
Puerto Rico
09/07/2011 11:06 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Some cats just don't knead. I have eight cats, and half of them don't make biscuits at all. But they're still affectionate cats who obviously like having me around (and not just for my can- and door-opening skills).

It's kind of nice, having a bunch of non-kneaders because the ones who do it are just crazy-insistent about it. As soon as I sit on the couch, it's like OMG WE LOVE YOU LET US KNEAD YOUUUUUU!!!1!! One of them is an obsessive licker, as well. I have some mild sensory processing issues, and on a bad day can go into complete Brain Overload with too much of certain types of physical stimuli--and unfortunately getting kneaded will do it.

And now I remember how an old boyfriend used to swear that the cats weren't really kneading biscuits as a display of affection. Instead, they were tenderizing me so I'd be more palatable... rofl
 Quoting: Electric Moon


LOL
Vegetable season
Barbie Chaos (OP)

User ID: 1099719
Puerto Rico
09/07/2011 11:07 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Why?

He loves me and all but he doesn't make biscuits. Why?

Is there something wrong with him?
 Quoting: Barbie Chaos



My grandaddy called biscuits "catheads"...
 Quoting: The Monk 1388350


HAHA WHY?
Vegetable season
I Ate Eat

User ID: 1538983
United Kingdom
09/07/2011 11:42 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Well it will make biscuits, just not very good ones because the fur tickles the back of your throut when you swallow it.
EAT ESCAPED
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1538829
United States
09/07/2011 11:44 AM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Thanks for the thread - I needed a good laugh today!


lolsign
Barbie Chaos (OP)

User ID: 1099719
Puerto Rico
09/07/2011 04:07 PM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Thanks for the thread - I needed a good laugh today!


lolsign
 Quoting: Cookstove


hahaha yeah
Vegetable season
samanthasunflower

User ID: 1485390
United States
09/07/2011 04:17 PM

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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
My cats steal my biscuits and make mouse stew to eat with it.

Ungrateful little &^%&^%*&^%&^%*&%**()(&!!!!
Barbie Chaos (OP)

User ID: 1099719
Puerto Rico
09/08/2011 11:08 PM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
My cats steal my biscuits and make mouse stew to eat with it.

Ungrateful little &^%&^%*&^%&^%*&%**()(&!!!!
 Quoting: samanthasunflower


lmao
Vegetable season
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1541306
United States
09/08/2011 11:17 PM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
The kneading thing is instinctive. Kittens do that when they're nursing, the kneading stimulates milk flow in the mother cat.

Probably hurts like hell too, little kitten claws are very sharp.
Queen Bea of Useless Knowledge

User ID: 1037270
United States
09/08/2011 11:22 PM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
Why?

He loves me and all but he doesn't make biscuits. Why?

Is there something wrong with him?
 Quoting: Barbie Chaos



My grandaddy called biscuits "catheads"...
 Quoting: The Monk 1388350


HAHA WHY?
 Quoting: Barbie Chaos


Was grandaddy southern? The old peeps called 'em that, catheads. Cus they were as big as a cat's head, lol. We've got such colorful language here. :)
"Chaos exists as a pool of possibilities that order draws from and organizes according to creative desire. Some things get tossed down the memory hole only to reemerge later when the need arises. Neither chaos nor order holds a monopoly on creation and destruction, creative or destructive chaos exists as does creative and destructive order." - ME! Yeah, Bea :) snoocherdoodle@gmail.com
Misfit

User ID: 1541328
United States
09/08/2011 11:30 PM
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Re: Why doesn't my cat make biscuits?
you need to buy that cat a cookbook first.
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