Debbie, I could have written your post to a "T." Except for the seven children part. I have one. He just turned four.

I've been wide awake since spring, for the most part. Always been discerning and such, not into following the masses, not shallow and unaware, but my eyes opened very wide this past March and April with Japan and Bin Laden (cough, cough) and I've been taking in an incredible amount of information since then. And I'm scared, too.

But it has all had a plus side: I cherish every moment now. When my little one gets up before 5 am and wakes me, I no longer feel aggravated and exhausted. I feel blessed, and hold him so close next to me, smothering him with love. Being afraid of "them", and their little games, all this doom, real, or not, has made me a more fully loving mother and wife.

My husband also says I read too much. But he's in touch with what I tell him, and I know that were I to say the word, he'd believe me fully and have us out of here, away from the ocean, in a heartbeat. No worries there.

I'm not sure what is real, and what is disinformation, and that is what bothers me the most. But I am learning to love more fully, and that can never be a bad thing. Once this next week is over, hopefully without event, I have a bucket list like you read about. I imagine that you do, too.

Love your family. Smile in the sun. Keep your preps updated and fully stocked. Keep a full tank of gas at all times. And try not to obsess; this is my biggest challenge of all, I must admit. Obsessing does nothing but steal away those moments of joy we might experience. If everything hits the fan soon, I don't want to spend countless hours leading up to it awash in despair and anxiety.

xxxooo