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*~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*

 
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:39 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
After reading a couple of other threads about the thoughts of one sex versing another, I have to wonder do we know why our marriages fail miserably so often in this country?

Is it because of money?

Are our expectations of one another are too high?

Do we not respect another persons right to be an individual in a marriage?

Have people become too selfish to sacrifice anything or too stubborn to compromise?

Too selfish to commit and work at it?

Or have people just flat out lost the ability to care ENOUGH for others?

This is not intended to be a bashing thread, just curious what other people's opinions are.
 Quoting: DoodleBug


Money is the number one reason couples fight...second is the woman feels like she needs a change and that her problems are his fault...
 Quoting: BRIEF


Is this because we live beyond our means or ya think we're just never satisfied?
 Quoting: DoodleBug


Money might be the number one reason couples fight but it is not the number one reason couples divorce.

As for "grass is greener on the other side"... you get over to the other side only to discover all that green is merely a paint job... no grass at all.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:39 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
The Walk away wife? How true! at least in the area I live in. People I work with, live on my street and people I know all have suffered from the walk away wife. In all cases there was no cheating and the marriage wasn't really bad. The women wanted change or something different.
But every cloud can have a silver lining if you make it happen. I now have more money and just paid off my house! I can't wait until that fateful day when my son mentions to her that dad's house is paid off. lol Loser!
 Quoting: infidel666


True, all divorces I know were instigated by the wife
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:39 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I have read that women file for divorce TWICE as much as men do.
 Quoting: DoodleBug


They need change!

Walk away wife syndrome, as explained by my lawyer...who has become a friend of mine...my ex left the kids and I two weeks before Christmas one year, that was a shitty Christmas let me tell ya...ever watch your children cry on Christmas? It sucks.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Sorry Brief, that would be very difficult.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:40 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
So many people are too selfish and self-absorbed. Our society is still basically very wealthy, and many people have simply grown up in comfortable, fairly privileged circumstance. When things don't work out perfectly like they frequently do on TV, in movies, people stress unduly, and don't know how to effectively deal.

Our society is also bombarded with a popular culture that says it's perfectly OK, just go to court, demand $, collect government benefits, etc., And the middle and lower classes are really just emulating the so-called upper classes, who traditionally have engaged in very selfish, spoiled, guilt-free behavior, and protected from the negative consequences by their wealth. We now have our whole society [by and large] behaving the way wealthy, privileged people have always behaved.

And make no mistake: for the past half century or more, so-called progressives [far left] have done everything they can to marginalize males and 'empower' females. Empowering females has often included 'having it all', children, no responsible husband, father,BF, don't worry, the government will give you $ and benefits.

I don't claim to be above all of this, either.

PS:

MANY 'poor' people have multiple kids out of wedlock, get married early [teens], get frequently divorced, etc., because for the female it's a way of 'holding' onto a man, getting government benefits, etc. And for the guy/boy, it's a part of a machismo culture. And of course we get many poor, 3rd world immigrants who behave the way they did in the poor, 3rd world country they came from. Pregnant at 15. married while still a teen, early 20s, etc.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1554566


So you think it's society, aka government, perpetuating this?
 Quoting: DoodleBug


Not just government. I think corporations have much more influence on people than the government. Do you know most advertising is aimed at females? About 80%. Why? Because companies/corporations know females love to SHOP, and buy stuff. They also know many women and girls are acutely insecure about themselves, their looks, status, etc., Guess what? All that advertising we're all bombarded with daily [aimed mostly at females] deliberately sucks up to it's target audience [females]. It deliberately stereotypes guys, because marketers know females in general like this, find it amusing, empowering. It encourages females to think yeah, they can have it all, no problem.

We also live in a post-industrial society, corporations/companies have decided female workers are preferable to male for a variety of reasons. They also 'suck up' to females [and part of the way of doing this is to marginalize males].
Earth Daughter

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09/25/2011 12:40 PM

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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
The Walk away wife? How true! at least in the area I live in. People I work with, live on my street and people I know all have suffered from the walk away wife. In all cases there was no cheating and the marriage wasn't really bad. The women wanted change or something different.
But every cloud can have a silver lining if you make it happen. I now have more money and just paid off my house! I can't wait until that fateful day when my son mentions to her that dad's house is paid off. lol Loser!
 Quoting: infidel666


True, all divorces I know were instigated by the wife
 Quoting: APOLLO ILLUMINAUGHTY


Not mine.
"Arrows of hate have been shot at me too, but they never hit me, because somehow they belonged to another world, with which I have no connection whatsoever." - Albert Einstein
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:41 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Marriage is man's law not God's law.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


Don't know which "god" you are speaking of , but as for the God of the Bible, Marriage is very much God's Law for mankind.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:43 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Many corporations and institutions like the military, etc. also seem to go out of their way to discourage, break up, families. Forcing people,families to constantly move, inadequate pay/benefits, making it difficult to balance home/work, etc.,
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:48 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
The Walk away wife? How true! at least in the area I live in. People I work with, live on my street and people I know all have suffered from the walk away wife. In all cases there was no cheating and the marriage wasn't really bad. The women wanted change or something different.
But every cloud can have a silver lining if you make it happen. I now have more money and just paid off my house! I can't wait until that fateful day when my son mentions to her that dad's house is paid off. lol Loser!
 Quoting: infidel666


True, all divorces I know were instigated by the wife
 Quoting: APOLLO ILLUMINAUGHTY


and all suicides after divorce i hear of are men...
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:49 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
And when Politician in the US speak of defending 'family values' don't they really mean it in the sense that 'we the government as parents, you the people as children'... are a family... and therefore do what they can to defend those family values and not the family values that human families really are all about.

A long long time ago in the USA, the State was merely and only a keeper of record as to the fact of a couples marriage... no license was needed... now its a Three party contract, husband, wife, and The State... this is way and how your children can become 'wards of the State', because of the usual State Marriage License.. the 'State Sanctioned Marriage' replaced the Religion Sanctioned Marriage, and in a sense created and established a new religion.
DoodleBug (OP)

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09/25/2011 12:52 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
So far what I see is,
Women want more, more, more.
People are selfish.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:53 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
And when Politician in the US speak of defending 'family values' don't they really mean it in the sense that 'we the government as parents, you the people as children'... are a family... and therefore do what they can to defend those family values and not the family values that human families really are all about.

A long long time ago in the USA, the State was merely and only a keeper of record as to the fact of a couples marriage... no license was needed... now its a Three party contract, husband, wife, and The State... this is way and how your children can become 'wards of the State', because of the usual State Marriage License.. the 'State Sanctioned Marriage' replaced the Religion Sanctioned Marriage, and in a sense created and established a new religion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


DISCLAIMER: I'M NOT LIBERAL OR CONSERVATIVE as most people think of these two terms.

Many of those 'conservatives' who tout 'family values' also are involved in companies/corporations/institutions that don't exactly encourage healthy families, home/work balance, etc.I take everything they say with a big grain of salt.

Radical lefties on the other hand simply say do whatever you want, the government will give you $, 'free' this or that.
Mr. R
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09/25/2011 12:55 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I can answer this logically and in a historical context, but it's not going to be very PC
DoodleBug (OP)

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09/25/2011 12:57 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I can answer this logically and in a historical context, but it's not going to be very PC
 Quoting: Mr. R 1522073


I don't know the password.
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

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09/25/2011 12:58 PM

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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I have read that women file for divorce TWICE as much as men do.
 Quoting: DoodleBug


They need change!

Walk away wife syndrome, as explained by my lawyer...who has become a friend of mine...my ex left the kids and I two weeks before Christmas one year, that was a shitty Christmas let me tell ya...ever watch your children cry on Christmas? It sucks.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Sorry Brief, that would be very difficult.
 Quoting: TexasGirl


After about two months she came back and we were together a year when she stopped counseling, which was my rule for taking her back...so I had to dump her in our last counseling session when she refused to do a simple letter writing exercise directed by the counselor.

We were married for almost 10 years

Last Edited by BRIEF on 09/25/2011 12:58 PM
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 12:59 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
it has to do with tv, internet and jolly ranchers........especially the apple jolly ranchers
wisc_natureboy
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09/25/2011 12:59 PM

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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
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wisc_natureboy
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Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:00 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I can answer this logically and in a historical context, but it's not going to be very PC
 Quoting: Mr. R 1522073


Lay it all out there... theories abound, perhaps they all are true to limited scopes and extents, let's hear yours/
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

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09/25/2011 01:01 PM

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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
 Quoting: wisc_natureboy


I blame historical romance novels...like any of that bullshit really ever happened!
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892
DoodleBug (OP)

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09/25/2011 01:03 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
 Quoting: wisc_natureboy


Ah, so that explains.

Hope we get an update
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:10 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Marriage is man's law not God's law.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


Don't know which "god" you are speaking of , but as for the God of the Bible, Marriage is very much God's Law for mankind.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


Exactly. The God of the Bible is man.
By the way: Look up in a concordance the words husband and wife in the book of Genesis, the definitions are different than what you think.
Storm*

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09/25/2011 01:15 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
 Quoting: wisc_natureboy


I blame historical romance novels...like any of that bullshit really ever happened!
 Quoting: BRIEF


I have never ever read one of those. I have also never watched a soap opera other than for about a week when Luke and Laura got married, and only because it meant an hour off of work because my boss watched it.

Edited because I am remembering wrong..it meant an hour after school before I had to start homework. My boss two years later was still addicted, but didn't share the time off with us.

Last Edited by Storm* on 09/25/2011 01:19 PM
DoodleBug (OP)

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09/25/2011 01:24 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
 Quoting: wisc_natureboy


I blame historical romance novels...like any of that bullshit really ever happened!
 Quoting: BRIEF


I have never ever read one of those. I have also never watched a soap opera other than for about a week when Luke and Laura got married, and only because it meant an hour off of work because my boss watched it.

Edited because I am remembering wrong..it meant an hour after school before I had to start homework. My boss two years later was still addicted, but didn't share the time off with us.
 Quoting: Storm*


I despise drama!

Just seems with all the trouble in the world that is out of our control that we'd stop creating more.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:25 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Marriage is man's law not God's law.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


Don't know which "god" you are speaking of , but as for the God of the Bible, Marriage is very much God's Law for mankind.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


Exactly. The God of the Bible is man.
By the way: Look up in a concordance the words husband and wife in the book of Genesis, the definitions are different than what you think.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


As to your second sentence, you are seriously confused.
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

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09/25/2011 01:27 PM

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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Because they were not GLP'ers first. ohyeah
 Quoting: wisc_natureboy


I blame historical romance novels...like any of that bullshit really ever happened!
 Quoting: BRIEF


I have never ever read one of those. I have also never watched a soap opera other than for about a week when Luke and Laura got married, and only because it meant an hour off of work because my boss watched it.

Edited because I am remembering wrong..it meant an hour after school before I had to start homework. My boss two years later was still addicted, but didn't share the time off with us.
 Quoting: Storm*


That's because you use your beauty and intelligence for good, instead of evil...my ex only used her powers for evil :(
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892
Mr. R
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09/25/2011 01:37 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I can answer this logically and in a historical context, but it's not going to be very PC
 Quoting: Mr. R 1522073


Lay it all out there... theories abound, perhaps they all are true to limited scopes and extents, let's hear yours/
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


This isn't going to be very popular

Divorce is common because people don't know what marriage is for anymore, why should they respect an institution whose value is touted as intrinsic rather than practical?

These days it's become just "something you do" instead of something you do for a real reason

It's common because integrity means nothing in western culture, only benefit of the self is valued in modern society

It's easy to say the words "til death do us part" or the like, it's another thing altogether to say something and mean it. People in western society don't see any harm in being liars. It's easy to walk away from a promise when you have no true self-respect or integrity

A true marriage is a pact between people to dedicate themselves to creating a family and raising their offspring in a way that is either beneficial to society, or at the very least, not detrimental

Anybody with a functional reproductive system can go and get knocked up. People (mostly women, it's hormonal) want children, the same way a child wants a puppy. They don't weigh the consequences, they don't consider how difficult life is going to be for their child, they just have kids because that's "what you do"

Theoretically, one should only conceive a child intentionally if one plans to dedicate ones life to raising that child properly, and it's nearly impossible to do this alone, thus the need for a lasting partnership between the parents. Ideally one wouldn't conceive a child unintentionally, but this is not an ideal world.

These days many people go through the motions of marriage because they are pressured to socially, or they just want tax cuts, or they use it as a way of securing their romantic interest like property. But this is foolish, because objectifying and claiming ownership of another person can be done without marriage, and marriage doesn't physically prevent anyone from leaving, cheating, etc

Ignorant of the true purpose of marriage, people get married because they think they're "in love" though most people these days have a gross misconception of what love is. So when their pseudo-love turns out to be insufficient to fuel their egos, they abandon their "pact" to search for sense gratification elsewhere

Divorce is common because western society as a whole has abandoned purpose and integrity in favor of profit and instant gratification
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:39 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
Marriage is man's law not God's law.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


Don't know which "god" you are speaking of , but as for the God of the Bible, Marriage is very much God's Law for mankind.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


Exactly. The God of the Bible is man.
By the way: Look up in a concordance the words husband and wife in the book of Genesis, the definitions are different than what you think.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1225402


As to your second sentence, you are seriously confused.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


Please do you're own research. Nuff said.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:41 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
the slave making business has dropped off... not as many slaves needed here - so the business arrangement called marriage also suffers.

sex & money brought to you by.... oh you already know who!


sex + money = the marriage business (also creates new slaves, cool bonus!)

dontcha love your MARITIME ADMIRALTY LAWS you never even heard of haha


as I say, the chosen fucks dont need new slaves right now... so the marriage scam is no longer supported / needed by your sheep hearders. aaaah pooor you (anyone that bought into their lies...again...)
CityGirl

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09/25/2011 01:43 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
In the south, girls are pressured into marrying young so they can have sex. They aren't taught about birth control so the fear of getting pregnant hangs over their head. They're told if they want to have sex they have to get married. So, they get married young. Then they grow up and realize their mistake and get out. Very common in the south and even more so in evangelical communities.
Anonymous Coward
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09/25/2011 01:47 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
After reading a couple of other threads about the thoughts of one sex versing another, I have to wonder do we know why our marriages fail miserably so often in this country?

Is it because of money?

Are our expectations of one another are too high?

Do we not respect another persons right to be an individual in a marriage?

Have people become too selfish to sacrifice anything or too stubborn to compromise?

Too selfish to commit and work at it?

Or have people just flat out lost the ability to care ENOUGH for others?

This is not intended to be a bashing thread, just curious what other people's opinions are.
 Quoting: DoodleBug


BECAUSE, no one matches their moon sign or does a astro chart on 2 people, if both people hhad the same moon sign, it is a blessing and they would have a better chance at getting along.
The Astrologer
DoodleBug (OP)

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09/25/2011 01:48 PM
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Re: *~*Why Is The US Divorce Rate So High*~*
I can answer this logically and in a historical context, but it's not going to be very PC
 Quoting: Mr. R 1522073


Lay it all out there... theories abound, perhaps they all are true to limited scopes and extents, let's hear yours/
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1456261


This isn't going to be very popular

Divorce is common because people don't know what marriage is for anymore, why should they respect an institution whose value is touted as intrinsic rather than practical?

These days it's become just "something you do" instead of something you do for a real reason

It's common because integrity means nothing in western culture, only benefit of the self is valued in modern society

It's easy to say the words "til death do us part" or the like, it's another thing altogether to say something and mean it. People in western society don't see any harm in being liars. It's easy to walk away from a promise when you have no true self-respect or integrity

A true marriage is a pact between people to dedicate themselves to creating a family and raising their offspring in a way that is either beneficial to society, or at the very least, not detrimental

Anybody with a functional reproductive system can go and get knocked up. People (mostly women, it's hormonal) want children, the same way a child wants a puppy. They don't weigh the consequences, they don't consider how difficult life is going to be for their child, they just have kids because that's "what you do"

Theoretically, one should only conceive a child intentionally if one plans to dedicate ones life to raising that child properly, and it's nearly impossible to do this alone, thus the need for a lasting partnership between the parents. Ideally one wouldn't conceive a child unintentionally, but this is not an ideal world.

These days many people go through the motions of marriage because they are pressured to socially, or they just want tax cuts, or they use it as a way of securing their romantic interest like property. But this is foolish, because objectifying and claiming ownership of another person can be done without marriage, and marriage doesn't physically prevent anyone from leaving, cheating, etc

Ignorant of the true purpose of marriage, people get married because they think they're "in love" though most people these days have a gross misconception of what love is. So when their pseudo-love turns out to be insufficient to fuel their egos, they abandon their "pact" to search for sense gratification elsewhere

Divorce is common because western society as a whole has abandoned purpose and integrity in favor of profit and instant gratification
 Quoting: Mr. R 1522073


AGREE!!

Wish I could give you good karma.

Thank you

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