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LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

 
Astrochik
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User ID: 1331439
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09/26/2011 02:16 PM
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LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
Please post your funniest:

Jokes OFF COLOR JOKES ALLOWED!

Videos

Pictures

and other "en-LIGHT-ening" stuff...

Preferably short and sweet.


Tonight I will choose my favorites and make a poll for voting on the best one. Whichever wins gets a prize. The prize I am giving is ... (big surprise) ASTROLOGY RELATED...see handle...

It's a custom-made (just for the winner, or the person the winner wants to give a very special gift to) natal chart necklace or bracelet - all gemstones and sterling silver beads...and the winner will even get to pick their favorite stones (from what I have available, which is a LOT - over a hundred)...

and I am still giving away free astrology reports if you send me your date, place and time of birth to astrochik@hotmail.com


Pick from a natal report or a forecast (time line) report...

AND JUST FOR CLARIFICATION - I AM NOT OFFERING ANYTHING FOR SALE ON THIS THREAD!!!

KNOCK KNOCK - WHo's THeRe? SMELL MOP.

Last Edited by Astrochik on 09/29/2011 07:32 PM
26 Qualities That Make Man God-Like:

1: Fearlessness 2: purity of heart 3: Steadfastness 4: Almsgiving 5: Self-restraint 6: Religious rites 7: Right study of the scriptures 8: Self discipline 9: Straightforwardness 10: Noninjury 11: Truth 12: Absense of wrath 13: Renunciation 14: Peace 15: Absence of fault-finding and calumny 16: Compassion toward all beings 17: Noncovetousness, absence of greed 18: Gentleness 19: Modesty 20: Absence of restlessness 21: Radiance of character 22: Forgiveness 23: Patience or fortitude 24: Cleanness of body and purity of mind 25: Nonhatred 26: Lack of conceit
Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 02:37 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
:fukit:
Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 02:38 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
OFF COLOR JOKES ALLOWED!
 Quoting: Astrochik


:hellnaaw:
Path_No_Logical_Ire

User ID: 774195
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09/26/2011 02:38 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!


afro
The dreamer and the dream
One awakens inside the other
To rediscover itself once again
Have you hugged yourself today?
Sammie

User ID: 1540855
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09/26/2011 02:48 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!


"Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow".  ~Aesop


"Once in a dream I saw a snake swallowing its own tail, it swallowed and swallowed until it got halfway round, and there it stopped and there it stayed, it was stuffed with its own self. Some fix, that.
We only have ourselves to go on, and it’s enough…" -Charles Bukowski



"Grasping at things can only yield one of two results:
Either the thing you are grasping at disappears, or you yourself disappear.
It is only a matter of which occurs first."
-Goenka
Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 06:11 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
I wanna be like this lady when I get "OLD"...



 Quoting: Astrochik


That's Huricane Hazel for you! We're proud of her.
Sammie

User ID: 1540855
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09/26/2011 06:16 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

"Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow".  ~Aesop


"Once in a dream I saw a snake swallowing its own tail, it swallowed and swallowed until it got halfway round, and there it stopped and there it stayed, it was stuffed with its own self. Some fix, that.
We only have ourselves to go on, and it’s enough…" -Charles Bukowski



"Grasping at things can only yield one of two results:
Either the thing you are grasping at disappears, or you yourself disappear.
It is only a matter of which occurs first."
-Goenka
Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 06:16 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

Anonymous Coward
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United Kingdom
09/26/2011 06:23 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
krave

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09/26/2011 06:35 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
methinks many peeps here on GLP need an injection of common sense:

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see." Watson replied: "I see millions and millions of stars." Holmes said: "And what do you deduce from that?" Watson replied: "Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life." And Holmes said: "Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent."
Narcoleptic Shill

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09/26/2011 06:37 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

MacElroy

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09/26/2011 07:18 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!





BubbleHead

User ID: 1442128
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09/26/2011 07:20 PM
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IFH Mondays


IRQ_1

User ID: 1157608
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09/26/2011 07:27 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!


Jack of all trades, master of none.
We are all the result of our past choices meeting the future.
"shall not be infringed."
HONOR... If you say you will, you do. If you say you won't you do not.
xen

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Australia
09/26/2011 07:55 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
bubscats


kickbubs

Last Edited by xen on 09/26/2011 08:08 PM
CyberCyrus

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Belgium
09/26/2011 07:59 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

CyberCyrus

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Belgium
09/26/2011 08:02 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
kettlnaut

User ID: 1448530
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09/26/2011 08:17 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
When you arrived on the moon, was the people there very friendly, or was they scared of you?



Love, Information, Curiosity, Creativity -->Man's Truly Divine Purpose for Life on this Planet!
-----------------------------------------------------​---------------
In the spirit of the Ancient Astronaut Astronomers (yeah I saw it on History Channel but we all have to begin enlightenment somewhere) I no longer discount myths, legends, prophecies etc based on age or source. They are valuable accounts from a time with a very different vocabulary and world view, and when seen in that light are now surprising evidence of amazing historical and future events!
Cassie :-)

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09/26/2011 08:17 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
chorus

birthday

band

Happy Birthday! Have a LITE Beer.

dasbier
That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.

"...the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." I John 1:7

"For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." Romans 6:23

And this is the record, that God hath given
kettlnaut

User ID: 1448530
United States
09/26/2011 08:19 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
Ok sorry one more, Ali G just makes me laugh!



Love, Information, Curiosity, Creativity -->Man's Truly Divine Purpose for Life on this Planet!
-----------------------------------------------------​---------------
In the spirit of the Ancient Astronaut Astronomers (yeah I saw it on History Channel but we all have to begin enlightenment somewhere) I no longer discount myths, legends, prophecies etc based on age or source. They are valuable accounts from a time with a very different vocabulary and world view, and when seen in that light are now surprising evidence of amazing historical and future events!
Astrochik (OP)

User ID: 1331439
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09/26/2011 08:36 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
chorus

birthday

band

Happy Birthday! Have a LITE Beer.

dasbier
 Quoting: Cassie :-)


bikelmao1rof1koolaidlolspankshockedlaughscaredshitstreamraspberrysuicidegrumpy2gotbopcheerswowey

That's funny!!! The only time "light" and "beer" should be used together in a sentence is along the lines of...

"Could you turn on the light, I can't find my beer!"

If it doesn't have at least 175 calories in a pint, I ain't drinking it!!
26 Qualities That Make Man God-Like:

1: Fearlessness 2: purity of heart 3: Steadfastness 4: Almsgiving 5: Self-restraint 6: Religious rites 7: Right study of the scriptures 8: Self discipline 9: Straightforwardness 10: Noninjury 11: Truth 12: Absense of wrath 13: Renunciation 14: Peace 15: Absence of fault-finding and calumny 16: Compassion toward all beings 17: Noncovetousness, absence of greed 18: Gentleness 19: Modesty 20: Absence of restlessness 21: Radiance of character 22: Forgiveness 23: Patience or fortitude 24: Cleanness of body and purity of mind 25: Nonhatred 26: Lack of conceit
MacElroy

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09/26/2011 08:59 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

OpenHeartMonk

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09/26/2011 09:37 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
bagman gets rolled for his can and some dirty hard bass..


HD Video and Photography by [link to www.StarBelt.ca]
Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 09:38 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
A cute and weird dancing bug.


<iframe width="560" height="315" src=" [link to www.youtube-nocookie.com (secure)] frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


[link to youtu.be]
IRQ_1

User ID: 1157608
United States
09/26/2011 09:56 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
A cute and weird dancing bug.


<iframe width="560" height="315" src=" [link to www.youtube-nocookie.com (secure)] frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


[link to youtu.be]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1532830



Jack of all trades, master of none.
We are all the result of our past choices meeting the future.
"shall not be infringed."
HONOR... If you say you will, you do. If you say you won't you do not.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1351486
United States
09/26/2011 09:58 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

Path_No_Logical_Ire

User ID: 774195
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09/26/2011 10:01 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

The dreamer and the dream
One awakens inside the other
To rediscover itself once again
Have you hugged yourself today?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1351486
United States
09/26/2011 10:03 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

Anonymous Coward
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09/26/2011 10:05 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

Rickster58

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Australia
09/26/2011 10:14 PM

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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!

Anonymous Coward
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United States
09/26/2011 10:15 PM
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Re: LAST CALL - "make me laugh"... the funniest humor will be voted on tonight - submit your entry today!!
I kinda feel for this kid, but he is probably ok by now, right?? lol

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