My son died yesterday, please say a prayer for his soul...and mine | |
Borian User ID: 1139038 United States 10/24/2011 08:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I just don't know what to do. This isn't supposed to happen. Not this way... Quoting: exiled1 My son was killed in a car accident yesterday. It is so painful to type these words, but I know there are good people on here and I really need all the help I can get right now. One month away from his twentieth birthday, didn't even make it out of the teens...damnit it hurts, and I feel so bad for his brother, he has no other siblings. I really thought I was through with the loss, I thought I had no more to lose...never thought this would happen, never even entertained the thought. I really believed I was making a comeback and things were starting to get better. Why this, why now??? I just returned from picking out caskets for him, believe me there is nothing more heart breaking to have to do...I still can not believe this is really happening. Family have been here fortunately but times like this when I am alone, gets pretty rough. One minute I am fine, the next you get knocked over by an overwhelming sense of grief or something...it really is too much to handle, I don't know what to do. I just wish i could go back in time and stop it from happening somehow... I don't know what to say, but please, please just say a prayer for us...I really don't think I am coming back from this one....its hurts so damn bad knowing you will never see him again...He was my fishing buddy and we never made the time to go out this past summer. The missed moments are tearing me up right now, didn't know I could hurt this bad. i am usually tougher than this. I love you buddy I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your son. I have been lucky and not lost any of my children and can't fathom the depths of your pain now. Please try to take comfort in knowing the grief will eventually pass. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. /God Bless. |
Ozark User ID: 1353975 United States 10/24/2011 09:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Sending love and prayers your way, exile1. Allow yourself to grieve but remain mindful of the good times and love you shared. Someone else said it best, to celebrate his life, that will help you keep yourself lifted up. Loved ones who have passed ARE OK, it is us that are here that grieve. He can hear you, speak words aloud and with your heart that you want him to hear and know. Peace and love to comfort you. Favorite quote or Haiku, Nikos Kazantzakis " I said to the Almond tree, "Sister, speak to me of God..." And the Almond tree blossomed... |
Weltsmertz User ID: 1280572 United States 10/24/2011 09:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I have been thinking about you all day. I read your post earlier, and have thought about you ever since. I cannot think of what I could say to make you feel better. I have two children about the age of which your son was; both boys. I can imagine the devastating loss you must be feeling. My brother died when I was young. I remember being at the hospital around the corner when my Mother got the news and hearing her cry. The depth of her pain in her voice was the worst sound I have ever heard. As an adult, I have spoken to my Mother about the loss of my brother, her son and have asked her how she managed to go on afterwards. She told me having me and my sister made it easier, because she HAD to go on for us. She told me of how, if he had been an only child she is not sure she would have ever gotten out of bed ever again. She told me that the love of a child never fades, that through the years she has always thought about my brother and imagined how he would be now, what he would think of a particular day or event. She told me she loved my brother so much that keeping him with her in thoughts and memories made her happy, he was always with her \ ans ow she would think of him, she would feel the LOVE and avoid the pain and so through the years my brother has always made her smile. ' I spoke with her today and told her of your lose, and she said there is not a thing anyone can do or say but that everyone who cares can let you know they are thinking of you. She said to tell you to think about and talk to your son everyday. Do not avoid remembering him, do not avoid his things...embrace them and embrace him in your heart everyday and before you know it you will be smiling when you do from the love and not in pain and sadness from the loss. i don;t know if this will help. But I am thinking of you toda. May you find peace. A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything. Friedrich Nietzsche if I did not feel so sad as I look at them. Sad because they do not know the truth and I do know it. Oh, how hard it is to be the only one who knows the truth! But they won't understand that. No, they won't understand it." --from The Dream of a Ridiculous Man (1877) |
Daughter of Nicholas User ID: 3601307 United States 10/24/2011 09:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
10:24 User ID: 1278817 United States 10/24/2011 09:03 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I don't have anything I can say to possibly make you feel better right now. I can't even imagine the weight of the grief. Is there anyone that can be with you right now? Family member or friend? It's much harder to be alone at a time like this. people want to believe in mysteries is the truth so bad? |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1332977 Canada 10/24/2011 09:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 3650237 United States 10/24/2011 09:07 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I am so sorry...but,if this is true,why are you posting on the interwebz instead of holding on to your family? I would,and I have only one child. I would rather be crying in the arms of those who LOVE me,my family,than strangers on the web who speak but do not truly care. My heart goes out to you if this is true. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2706830 United States 10/24/2011 09:11 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Please know that I am actually moved to tears by your original post; didn't read further. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1500293 I'm am so, so sorry for this ultimate loss. Be brave. Take a breath. Be brave. Take a breath. And so on. Sometimes that's all anyone can do. Bless you. that's a good way of putting it. that's exactly what it is, the ultimate loss. devastating. |
goldie User ID: 2173471 United States 10/24/2011 09:13 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | So sorry about your terrible loss. The pain of sudden loss of a child is unspeakable. There are no words in language to truely describe it. I lost my youngest son to a drunk driver. Be patient and gentle with yourself. Moving through this kind of grief is a long jouney. There were times that I felt I didn't want to go on. What helped the most? People's prayers A good support group Asking the Lord to help me everyday Going back to work and staying busy Having an unbelievable friend that I could share everything that I was going through with. It is true that you won't be in this level of pain always. It does soften and becomes like walking around with a missing limb or a hole for the rest of life. A day did eventually come when I moved back into life again. God bless you and I will lift you in prayer. |
MarkinAZ User ID: 1372469 United States 10/24/2011 09:14 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My prayers are with you. There is so little else one can offer you at a time like this. Every parents' nightmare. Our children are truly not ours. They're on loan to us from God for whatever time he allows. Usually we assume they will be here long after we are gone. Sadly, that isn't always the case. The searing and awful pain you are feeling now will not last. It gradually gets better and becomes something that, although you'll constantly be aware of it, you will find it easier and easier to bear. The fact that you had him this long was a great gift. Love your other son and help him thru this. He must be feeling totally abandoned on top of the loss he shares with you. Encourage him to talk about his feelings and don't allow him to hold this inside or blame himself somehow. While it is one hell of a way to do so, this kind of tragedy can bring you great growth. Draw close to God and allow him to nurture and love you thru this time. Prayer really does help. I am so sorry for your loss. Every day that my child is okay, I try to remember to be grateful for it. Like most men, I forget much of the time and I take it for granted. Reading what you wrote today will make me remember to be thankful for each and every day for a long long time. May God be with you... and see you thru this time of loss and mourning. |
Freckles User ID: 688490 Puerto Rico 10/24/2011 09:17 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
sandpiper User ID: 3960245 United States 10/24/2011 09:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | May the LORD of mercy put HIS loving arms around you and tell you that your son is with HIM. Peace, we shall all be together soon, forever and ever and ever. Keep your good memories close to your heart and relive them. Prayers always for you and yours. If you break my wings, I will just find a cloud and learn to fly again. The Lord will catch you when you fall or teach you to fly! May the footprints I leave lead you to BELIEVE. |
ajax User ID: 3766144 United States 10/24/2011 09:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
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Anonymous Coward User ID: 1305582 Canada 10/24/2011 09:26 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 3957197 Canada 10/24/2011 09:29 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ...I offer my heartfelt condolences at the passing of your beloved son...may he know the comfort of sweet Jesus' loving embrace... ...I pray that God bless you and keep you in this time of sorrow...and that the anticipated joy of being reunited with your boy, sustain you until that wonderful day!... |
kirkita User ID: 3863477 United States 10/24/2011 09:30 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
mopar28m User ID: 3877054 United States 10/24/2011 09:30 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 3650237 United States 10/24/2011 09:31 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Sorry for your loss. Can't imagine losing my 19 year old son. All I can say is that God has a plan that we have no way of understanding. Be strong, keep the faith. Best of luck on redefining and rebuilding your future. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1305582 Yes...GOD IS in control,no matter that we cannot see the big picture. Perhaps his son has been spared what is to come. |
Project_Deimos User ID: 999284 United States 10/24/2011 09:31 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Sorry for your loss...keep his brother close, he's going to need you. "There are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say, we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don't know we don't know." |
endave User ID: 1525748 United States 10/24/2011 09:35 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My acoustic/folk music channel: [link to www.youtube.com (secure)] |
Lilhippychic User ID: 979327 Puerto Rico 10/24/2011 09:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Psalm 27:4-5 One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock. "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam" ~ Popeye |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1403338 United States 10/24/2011 09:38 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | We should be honored and humbled that you seek comfort and respite from your pain here amongst strangers. Your pain is much. As said in Tenderness, the movie: "Pleasure helps you forget. But pain, pain forces you to hope" We hope with you. Grieve Not Grieve Not is the name of my town. Pain and fear cannot enter there, Free from possessions, free from life’s taxes, Free from fear of disease and death. After much wandering I am come back home Where turns not the wheel of time and change, And my Emperor rules, without a second or third, In Abadan, filled with love and wisdom. Th e citizens are rich in the wealth of the heart, And they live ever free in the City of God. Listen to Ravidas, just a cobbler: “All who live here are my true friends.” Ravidas |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 3650237 United States 10/24/2011 09:38 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Psalm 27:4-5 Quoting: Lilhippychic One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock. I like you A LOT. |
Nine's User ID: 2838278 United States 10/24/2011 09:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I am so sorry...but,if this is true,why are you posting on the interwebz instead of holding on to your family? I would,and I have only one child. I would rather be crying in the arms of those who LOVE me,my family,than strangers on the web who speak but do not truly care. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 3650237 My heart goes out to you if this is true. He already explained that, and you're wrong. People on the web DO care. Every mother cares. Can't speak about fathers, but I'll bet my life that every person who has a child, has ever loved a child, or who has wanted a child, cares. Very deeply. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 475553 United States 10/24/2011 09:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1847714 Canada 10/24/2011 09:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | In living and in death we are given these special gifts to hold in our possession always remember we get to hold their hands for a short time and they live in our hearts forever. My thoughts are with you on this very rough journey you have embarked on. No parent should ever have to say good-bye to their child. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2706830 United States 10/24/2011 09:41 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 514346 United States 10/24/2011 09:43 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
The Voice In Your Head User ID: 1379486 United States 10/24/2011 09:44 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I read your original post, and seriously had to fight back tears. Your clearly evident pain leaves me at a loss of words. This one is for you and your boy: The love of a father The loss of a son The challenge now built There is a new conquering That needs to be done An October day The leaves fall away In your good heart Your son will forever stay Don't let this knock you down Don't lose your stride For when you're done with your journey You both shall hug on the other side You and both of your sons will be in my family's prayers. May peace find you soon. In the mean time, know that there are thousands of hands here that will happily try to help and hold you up. Last Edited by The Voice In Your Head on 10/24/2011 10:21 PM I'm just a figment of your imagination ;-) |