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Message Subject make chewy crusty artisan BREAD with 5 minutes of your time! seriously! and cheap!
Poster Handle Anonymous Coward
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I used to have be the biscuit maker at a local hole in the wall joint that made biscuits everyday. the recipe was terrible and I hated doing it but nobody else could make biscuits, so the manager told me to do it and he would pay me extra for that 1 hr!

This is the actual recipe and how these fucking rednecks can eat his is beyond me because i was raised on real buttermilk biscuit is not this crap!

8-10 scoops of self-rising flour in a large mixing bowl
1 gallon of buttermilk
3/4large glass of cooking oil

Mix everything together with your hands and with a large ice cream scoop, you take one scoop of said glop and dump it in this pan that had more flour in it. Then i had to roll the biscuit around and get it coated really well and pat it out to a good size shape and lay it on a greased baking sheet. I usually made about 4-6 pans of these biscuits everyday. They wouldn't really rise because that's what they were supposed to do, just rise a tiny bit but they browned nicely and came out great and honey around here, folks eat these up because they somehow have this retarded notion that if they pullout the inside of the biscuit,that they are not getting as many carbs as you normally would! I mean the mentality of stupid fucking rednecks is beyond me.
I swear, I got pissed one day because another girl was complaining that she wasn't getting paid anything extra by the boos for that extra hour i used to make those biscuits so she was doing my job,waiting tables and washing dishes besides my making biscuits, and it pissed her off. So when she complained the boss got mad at me and and told me that he was taking money out of his account to keep the place going and that I CAME TO HIM and asked to do it.That's a lie! He asked me to stop by the place one day and talked tome and begged me to make the damn thing cuz nobody else could or would do it! so, I said yeah,okay,and when blew the whistle on his ass for lying and told the real truth about how he came to me instead, he got pissed and said right there that i wasn't gonna do it anymore!
I was so mad, i went into the bathroom and took off my apron and walked out the fucking door cuz i wasn't about to let him lie on me about something he did. Later on that night i called up the cook's house and her husband tried to start cussing at me but i cut him off and told him the real truth of what was going on and he thought about it and said,well, i guess you were in the right,then. i know i was. and I collected unemployment for damn near a yr cuz of that shit.
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