"all i can tell you is i feel like daz aveu or whatever you call it, like i have lived this time over and over again. for what reason? i have no clue maybe until i get it right,"

Deja vu, dude. And it's killing me. Every day something happens to me that I recognize "been there, done that". Even movies that have just come out that I have never seen. It seems like I've seen them years ago, and I already know what's going to happen and there are no surprises for me.

Even lunches that I know I've eaten before, I have to eat again. (At least they were the good lunches.)

Timelines are converging dude.