Six Sigma is a Fucking Stupid Fad, Fuck Six Sigma

For those of you that are wondering what I am talking about its a stupid fad thats all the rave in the corporate world now. It basically analyses your work down to how many shits you take and then lets the company fire people and work the rest of you like slaves.

The worst part is all these little fucking foreigners that love this shit. They don't mind looking at you in terms of "productive units per day".

Hey, we don't have a cast system here pals. You can threaten us like we will be forced to go pick some fucking rice if we lose our jobs like in your shit hole countries.

An increased emphasis on strong and passionate management leadership and support?

It's secondary psycopathic brainwashing material.

Anyone who takes these type of psychological classes needs to be distinctly aware of how their minds are being played with because that is what is happening and it is very dangerous.

666

Preaching to the choir OP.

Yeah, I've seen that at my last job. Some people are Six Sigma Certified and can evaluate for the rest of the board. Never had a problem with it personally, though it sounds like the biggest form of corporate voyeurism thus far.

Man sorry guys, I just had to do a Webinar for Six Sigma shit at work and I wanted to ninja the dude though the computer.

I once had a manager who loved to talk about his "Six Sigma Green Belt"...

He was a fucking tool to say the least.

I had one of my kids photoshop a frame from a Dilbert comic to make that pointy haired manager guy have a green belt.

Then I had him replace the words in the bubble to paraphrase the douchebage manager.

Then I spread it all over the office.

I wasn't around too long after that, but it was worth it.

I see the problem as people go get training, but have no experience, then all of a sudden they think their IQ went up and everyone else went down. They refuse to listen.

Sad waste of money.

Almost always this happens when they select a few green people who have no experience and are out to prove that they are better than anyone else.

It shows management does not understand six sigma. Oh, this is the same management who does not know how to listen and run companies into the ground.

Six sigma can enable change. But it the human network, the real listening, that adds values. Without the ability to communicate honestly six sigma and other process optimization is useless.

Same can be said about the MBA, TQM, MTQ, and the other process improvement programs. If communications suck then fix that first.

I feel your pain.

A certain large IT company calls it GDF (Global Delivery Framework). Loosely translated as lets offshore all the jobs to India and China and pay those workers peanuts but still bill our customers the same rate.
The funny thing is that the overseas bods do such a crap job that we end up having to clean up afterwards and it ends up costing us more and taking longer than if we had done the work ourselves in the first place but you can't tell that to the spreadsheet managers. /rantover

I am in open rebellion now on this shit. Hey, I understand that things can be improved and made more efficient, but when you strive for a human error rate of 3 in 33 million, lay off the bong water.

You see, whats really happening here is this whole thing and other systems like the LEAN system were designed to make us all lay everyone off and destroy economies. So the programs in their quest for efficiency end up destroying the system because 20% dont have a job and overthrow the government.

We have the same problem, here in the US, with that too...

I know this thread is old, but I just finished 6 Sigma and had to join and let people know how awesome it was.


No, I'm kidding. Seriously.





I wasted 9 days of my life sitting through lectures about how to cut off un needed processes. Like I had no idea that the guy getting paid $10/hr in the corner jacking his stick could be helping someone causing a bottleneck to speed up production.

My Nephew came in my home the other day wearing a Six Sigma Tshirt he got from some training class for high school students. The first thing I noticed was it had three 6's on the shirt. The first was the word Six and then two numerical 6's were along the right front side. I asked him what the logo's meant and he said he had no idea. I wasn't surprised seeing how our entire reality is a program made up of more programs that keep us chasing our tails.

Peace

Last Edited by Amy_A on 07/14/2012 02:30 AM

ge, 666 sigma and mismanagement took my job

ruska, nice company, then GE screwed us

ripped us apart sold chunks for nothing, and fucked everyone out of a job

fuck 666sigma, ge, danaher, and fluke

may the cerebus dog of finance devour you

Six Sigma been around for decades, had to take a training course back in the 80's , it sucked then and it sucks today

Etymology

"Sigma" was a Greek innovation that simply meant "hissing", based on a nominalization of a verb σίζω (sízō, from earlier *sig-jō, meaning 'I hiss').

Glp tards will applaud you on this thread and then espouse Ayn Rand and Libertarianism on another. Talk about idiots who can't connect the dots.

^^^So Who here's votin Romney this election? Irony.

American business should have stood up for human right when we opened Asia to business, but nope American Corporations just saw dollar sign and cheap labor and now the descendents of slave labor are the Bosses and their coming to America. Uh oh.

Ever notice how when the NGO's go into foreign countries they NEVER try to organize labor, which would be easier to change leadership than civil war or sanctions.

It might take a while but newly industrialized countries will eventually say hell no to unfair labor practices just like the West did.

I always marvel at how the West can't accept that people are all the same and want the same things.

I studied this crap, it makes sense in a Virgo way, but if us Virgos ran the world, it would be;
'list your toothbrushing technique.'
Not good.
Too much.
As I wrote in a poem years ago:
Why do we have to analyze everthing we see?
Why can't we just close our eyes,
sit back,
and Let it Be?
Works good.
Love.

Six Sigma is a fucking idiotic, overrated shit hole!

Oh what a idiots...

I am a pro in statistics and see how all these assholes abuse all you can..

It is all about how to lie with statistics...

The sad thing is that these idiots do not know what they are doing...Fuckers!

Love this Thread!

Just had to shout it out!

FUCK SIX EVIL SIGMA SHIT!

it's that bad, huh? have seen it at our local university.

give me a for instance.

Welcome to corporate slavery. Sigma 6 is perfect for turning your workforce into drones. Monitor their every move, time card swipe, how long it take you to log into a terminal, how long to process a backroom etc. You are no longer a human being. You are just a byte.

6 sigma

666.........................

Depressed Yellow Belt says