Quoting: Once4All Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10978371 Quoting: Once4All
... Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10978371
I HATE darkness..I hate evil..I HATE it all with a passion.
Yet I am NOT LOVED!
You are alive and have the opportunity to be a part of the Kingdom of God forever. If you seek Him you will find Him. The responsibility is your now. Why would you say you are not loved?
Cause I am alone and unknown to anyone.
I have about as much LOVE in my life as your average maggot does..NONE.
NO one gives a rats rear end about me..and if I died tomorrow NO one would give a shit.
All I have known all my life is BULLSHIT..and more BULLSHIT..backstabbed by friends..let down by a GOD who SAYS he loves me but does not do a damn thing to make it real.
Its all words..all I have ever had from anyone is words...its the actions I look for..the REAL love..not the mamby pamby "Jesus loves you" rubbish that is just more words.
I could tell YOU that I love YOU..but it would be meaningless because you are there..I am here..we would never meet..so my words mean NOTHING.
Its the same with God..HE is there..SURROUNDED by people and angels that LOVE HIM..its all well and good for him..he has it made..he is surrounded by friends and by love..
But for me..here..now in this pathetic shithole lonley life..I have NO one....so tell me..how are more WORDS going to make me beleive if all I have ever had is WORDS that have as yet failed to make me beleive?
How are you possibly going to find Love with that kind of attitude? I don't know what is 'blocking' you from finding God. Perhaps you need to forgive someone or even yourself. But, i can tell you this, God manifests Himself to the MEEK and the POOR IN SPIRIT. I'm not hearing either one of those from you. Humble yourself before God and He will lift you up. Placing demands on Him won't do it!
I am not DEMANDING anything..just asking for what is a natural huamn thing..to be LOVED..and to KNOW I am loved..not just told from some parrot..or book.
Is LOVE too much to ask for?
I used to be so soft..so gentle...so poor in spirit like you said..
But years have passed..all I DID have in my life that HAD any love vanished one by one...
IT HURTS..especially for a soft hearted person like me..
So am I to be CONDEMNED because I HURT??...cause I just want to be LOVED??
Time keeps ticking..soon will tick the final seconds of what has turned out for ME to be a complte waste of a life..
I started out so well..so full of hope and joy and..well..its all gone...nothing left now but death..and an empty shell of what ONCE was a vibrant hope filled very much alive man..
What happenned to me??..where did my heart go?
Where did life go?
What was it all about anyway?