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If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.

 
~Una~

User ID: 9534510
New Zealand
01/28/2012 05:46 PM

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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
I enjoyed that, and i even found a couple of words i didn't know.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9581563


Every word? I'd say the figure would be higher than 90%.

I've always considered myself to be well above average in verbal skills. I aced every English course through high school and freshman college & I always did well on standardized tests. My older sister had a masters in English. When I was a kid, she always corrected my grammar and pronunciation. Nevertheless, there are a few that stumped me.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9738007


chuckle that is because you american's do not speak 'proper' english ;)
This 'reality' is a holographic simulation. It exists only in your mind, but all your senses tell you otherwise. It is a prison controlled and created by the annunaki, but the walls are falling and people are waking. Thread: Hello Gods and Goddesses (Page 140)
Anonymous Coward
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01/28/2012 06:05 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
dont be axe'in questions
Too Dark Park

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01/28/2012 06:06 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
stir
 Quoting: 1342725


So, you cant read I take it


fuckthatguy
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 06:15 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Lots of fun! Of course I can read it - and use the words properly. Not bragging; I was just taught to love and use language. Unfortunately, as a kid I was a spelling bee nerd. It is very sad that people not only speak poorly but that the full vista of language has been neglected.

However, what is the word with the typo supposed to be - "Fe0ffe"? The correct word would nice, since I intend to send this poem along to others.

Thanks, OP!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 06:22 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Aced it !
Anonymous Coward
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United Kingdom
01/28/2012 06:28 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Hey Jasmine,

Most excellent. Right on.
 Quoting: Mickeyblue 9745215


Totally brilliant!

No wonder Johnny-Foreigner types can't learn English!

cruise
Judethz
Israel is Eternal

User ID: 5159851
United Kingdom
01/28/2012 06:32 PM

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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Too long.
Jasmine (OP)

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United States
01/28/2012 07:17 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Lots of fun! Of course I can read it - and use the words properly. Not bragging; I was just taught to love and use language. Unfortunately, as a kid I was a spelling bee nerd. It is very sad that people not only speak poorly but that the full vista of language has been neglected.

However, what is the word with the typo supposed to be - "Fe0ffe"? The correct word would nice, since I intend to send this poem along to others.

Thanks, OP!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 8868569



AC, I am not the author of this poem, I do not have that answer. However I can offer a link to follow for more detailed information:)



[link to ncf.idallen.com]

Notes on The Chaos

"The Chaos" is a poem which demonstrates the irregularity of English spelling and pronunciation, written by Gerard Nolst Trenité (1870-1946), also known under the pseudonym Charivarius. It first appeared in an appendix to the author’s 1920 textbook Drop Your Foreign Accent: engelsche uitspraakoefeningen. (From Wikipedia: [link to en.wikipedia.org]

Last Edited by Jasmine on 01/28/2012 07:19 PM
Southernbella

User ID: 954820
United States
01/28/2012 07:27 PM

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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Enjoyed. Thanks for sharing.
Linguisticstard
User ID: 9549595
Canada
01/28/2012 07:29 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
As an English teacher I think this is brilliant! I am going to show this to my students on Monday. Thanks OP.
 Quoting: Nonna


For your students:

Write "photi" on the board and ask them to pronounce it.

They will say - - fo tea

Tell them, that according to examples of English spelling,
photi = "fish" Then prove it...

ph = f Models: philosopher, photograph
o = i Model: women
ti = sh Models: station, nation

Enjoy...
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 07:30 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Thanks for the source, OP.
wil b wuz

User ID: 1343403
United States
01/28/2012 07:32 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Im not sure how to pronounce latter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1312616


Like ladder but with hard T sound instead of D. It means opposite of former.
Anonymous Coward
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France
01/28/2012 07:35 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Get ready for the fight spelltards. yoda
Anonymous Coward
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Denmark
01/28/2012 07:38 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Enjoy!


Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Fe0ffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!
English Pronunciation by G. Nolst Trenité
 Quoting: Jasmine


aww how cool..does that mean i can get a job?
Linguisticstard
User ID: 9549595
Canada
01/28/2012 07:46 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Then there is the "ough" lesson....

enough = uff as in puff and bluff

cough = off as in off or loft

dough = oh as in Oh! or tow

bought = awe as in hawthorne or father or thought

through = oo as in Boo! or tooth

plough = ow as in ouch! or owl
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9772343
Portugal
01/28/2012 08:06 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
And this happens because english has so few different sounds. Many words sound almost the same. Even combining latin with german words the stupid brits couldn't come out with a rich variety language.

5a
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9284451
United Kingdom
01/28/2012 08:08 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
And this happens because english has so few different sounds. Many words sound almost the same. Even combining latin with german words the stupid brits couldn't come out with a rich variety language.

5a
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9772343


what a stupid fucking post.

really mate, get a fucking life.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 08:15 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
That was fun.
~Una~

User ID: 9534510
New Zealand
01/28/2012 09:11 PM

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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Im not sure how to pronounce latter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1312616


Like ladder but with hard T sound instead of D. It means opposite of former.
 Quoting: wil b wuz


that's like the some in the USA pronouncing butter as budder
This 'reality' is a holographic simulation. It exists only in your mind, but all your senses tell you otherwise. It is a prison controlled and created by the annunaki, but the walls are falling and people are waking. Thread: Hello Gods and Goddesses (Page 140)
M.DavidPower

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United States
01/28/2012 09:17 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
bump

5* and karma for you OP. Brilliant.

shin this pit
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 09:22 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
more like 98%
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 09:22 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Im not sure how to pronounce latter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1312616


Like ladder but with hard T sound instead of D. It means opposite of former.
 Quoting: wil b wuz


that's like the some in the USA pronouncing butter as budder
 Quoting: ~Una~


It sounds that way, but it isn't. It is a "T" with the sound projected backward, instead of forward. This is a result of the tongue being drawn back, instead of forward.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/28/2012 09:32 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
I'm going to use parts of that for my son's dictation exercises.
Anonymous Coward
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01/28/2012 09:40 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
I was always the one in Sunday school who could read the weird Bible names and words without stumbling. A family of wordtards we are, favorite games are Boggle and Scrabble. Although I get bored with the latter - too few letters to choose from. I'd love to have work as a proofreader, but I don't do it for fun to annoy people, like some I know.
 Quoting: SaintIn


Really speaking, you should end the sentence after ..'wordtards we are' with a period, then start a new sentence.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9284451

A semi colon would work too.
Manu-Koelbren

User ID: 1312616
Spain
01/28/2012 09:44 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Im not sure how to pronounce latter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1312616


Like ladder but with hard T sound instead of D. It means opposite of former.
 Quoting: wil b wuz


Thanks that cleared that up for me. Btw I knew what it meant but as I dont usually speak English (just write on it mostly) didnt know the pronunciation. hf
"White privilege" is the liberal religion's version of Original Sin: you are born guilty, and you carry that burden of guilt all your life, and the only way to escape eternal damnation is for white people confess their sin, to bow, kneel and believe the dogma of the Church of Liberalism, genuflect at its altars, honor its saints, fill the collection plate, and never, ever doubt.

-- Dixon Diaz
BellesLettres
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01/28/2012 09:53 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
bsflagOp got too much time on his hands
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1458750


Right, because maybe an hour of cognitive fun is less useful than watching the telly.
Go watch coronation street, you cretinous twat.
Better an hour of cerebral usage than an hour of a glazed,empty stare directed at the tv.
You lot seriously have dwindled in intelligence.
One does wonder what classical English writers would be saying right now. Oh, England...I barely knew ye.
pigchef
Anonymous Coward
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01/28/2012 09:58 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Time flies like the wind.

Fruit flies like bananas.
~Una~

User ID: 9534510
New Zealand
01/28/2012 10:33 PM

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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Im not sure how to pronounce latter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1312616


Like ladder but with hard T sound instead of D. It means opposite of former.
 Quoting: wil b wuz


that's like the some in the USA pronouncing butter as budder
 Quoting: ~Una~


It sounds that way, but it isn't. It is a "T" with the sound projected backward, instead of forward. This is a result of the tongue being drawn back, instead of forward.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1370806


yeah when I lived with my ex husband (he was from massc.) in NC his butter and actually a few of my neighbours always sounded precisely like budda to these kiwi ears. :D
This 'reality' is a holographic simulation. It exists only in your mind, but all your senses tell you otherwise. It is a prison controlled and created by the annunaki, but the walls are falling and people are waking. Thread: Hello Gods and Goddesses (Page 140)
Freckles

User ID: 689251
United States
02/04/2012 10:38 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
Read this out loud to my family... We all loved it!

Thank you, OP!!!

hf
Way out in the middle of Nowhere, USA.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 4284512
United States
02/04/2012 10:58 PM
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Re: If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
I enjoyed that, and i even found a couple of words i didn't know.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9581563


Every word? I'd say the figure would be higher than 90%.

I've always considered myself to be well above average in verbal skills. I aced every English course through high school and freshman college & I always did well on standardized tests. My older sister had a masters in English. When I was a kid, she always corrected my grammar and pronunciation. Nevertheless, there are a few that stumped me.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9738007


i am with you. there were a couple in there i was not familiar with.

two asides. i hear top echelon type people mispronounce words. second, spanish is one hell of a lot easier than english.

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