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Right now were dead, when we die we wake up

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 5254869
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02/19/2012 04:53 PM
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Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 04:59 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
are you there yet?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:00 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Nope I'm very much trapped here still.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 05:04 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 05:07 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Who am I? Who are you? One sent from God. You are a word spoken from God which he keeps speaking, if he stopped you would cease to exist.
humanitech
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02/19/2012 05:20 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Well friend having travelled and explored the world, rather than just blindly followed other peoples rules and doctrines friend ...I hope you don't mind if I say you're talking rubbish.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:21 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:24 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
Conveyor1138

User ID: 1549621
United States
02/19/2012 05:24 PM

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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Death is a option, but we do have other options to escape this "illusion" you mention. For example, the Tibetan monks have mastered their astral bodies, and thus they see through all 60 dimensions from within without the need for dieing. I believe our bodies much like cocoons, in which stars emerge.
Moving forward.
Memories left behind. A new life, a new journey. I've built anew.
For mankind... for my kind.
The vessel stares back at me. From every angle, the menacing smile latches on.
Talking walls speak and spell my life story.
My past life.
The vessel sleeps beside me... the comfort breath.
Morning skin of machines, of humanity's beginnings.
Am I God? I've been called worse... drift in and out.
This vessel brings me sleep.
Hyper Sleep
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:27 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Well friend having travelled and explored the world, rather than just blindly followed other peoples rules and doctrines friend ...I hope you don't mind if I say you're talking rubbish.
 Quoting: humanitech 10976473


Yep I've travelled a lot too, and i subscribe to NO doctrines, I hate all religions, or forms of belief, i dont believe anything and i don trust anything, do you?
Anonymous Coward
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Brazil
02/19/2012 05:27 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up


The TRUTH.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11099725
Brazil
02/19/2012 05:30 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
IMO, your view is mostly correct, but still too much biased (I wouldn't say this life is not 'horrible'. There is purpose to it.). Read the book Matrix V edited by Valdamar Valerian. Even before reading that book I already had my own completed model of Creation, which doesn't follow any known doctrine by the way. Everything in that book made a lot of sense to me and never got into conflict with my previous model. Though when it comes to spiritual matters, language is always a trap, and personal bias is always in the way.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 05:43 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Yes, in Gnosticism, were considered the dead. Our bodies is the sepulchre or tomb. We are constantly being taunted by demons and thieves and gluttons. Newspaper headlines constantly keep us in fear.

We watch helplessly as we grow attached to someone and lose them. (what most view as death) But we are the dead ones.

The Egyptians thought so too

We are basically in HELL right now
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 05:46 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Thats me OP, cause I was in a accident. I had maybe four pain free years of youth and goodlooks, and thats it, Four years from ages 16-20

The rest of my life has been chronic pain and struggle. If it werent for those that cared for me, Id be gone. Theres nothing in this world I really want.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:48 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
IMO, your view is mostly correct, but still too much biased (I wouldn't say this life is not 'horrible'. There is purpose to it.). Read the book Matrix V edited by Valdamar Valerian. Even before reading that book I already had my own completed model of Creation, which doesn't follow any known doctrine by the way. Everything in that book made a lot of sense to me and never got into conflict with my previous model. Though when it comes to spiritual matters, language is always a trap, and personal bias is always in the way.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11099725


Would you kindly explain the purpose of this?

I mean I technically "get" it, I'm experiencing physicality, duality, pain, happy, etc I've researched this stuff all my life, i know the purpose of pain, negativity and polarity, etc

But in this life I've never eveR felt true happiness, I've had small moments of laughter, cheerfulness, momentary happiness, but it's all distractions, I've had great friendships, been in love, travelled, made things, music, art, expression, etc

None of it has been worth it, NONE, I would trade it all just to escape this and go back.

Ive never felt like I knew who i am or what im here for and it KILLS me wih anguish to be stuck here like a zombie.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/19/2012 05:53 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Thats me OP, cause I was in a accident. I had maybe four pain free years of youth and goodlooks, and thats it, Four years from ages 16-20

The rest of my life has been chronic pain and struggle. If it werent for those that cared for me, Id be gone. Theres nothing in this world I really want.
 Quoting: APOLLO ILLUMINATI


Bro I feel ya, i got chronic pain too, it started when i was like 18, i was a junkie on opiates for years afterwards, even injected crack and oxycodone, I've been clean for a year and still nowhere close to being happy, nowhere. There's nothing in this reality i want or look forward to, NOTHING.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 05:57 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


but you do know that you are more than this moment and this physical body? You will be fine, just know that to be free from this body is to return to your natural eternal state (which you always had been) i.e "home". and yet I get the sense that the two worlds may collide (where the seperation from physical body in order to evolve (pass on *death*) will not be required). Where death itself will die. Something powerful is on the horizon
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 06:08 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
and it will benefit us all greatly
Serpo

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02/19/2012 06:12 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Sorry but this is real,we are alive and I love it..........
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 06:13 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Oh wow,can't believe that I am the firstbonghit
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 06:15 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
LOL Very cool! My 10 year old son told me the same thing last May.

hf
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 06:16 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


There was a Jewish leader named Nicodemus, who belonged to the party of the Pharisees. One night he went to Jesus and said to him, "Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher sent by God. No one could perform the miracles you are doing unless God were with him." Jesus answered, "I am telling you the truth: no one can see the Kingdom of God without being born again." "How can a grown man be born again?" Nicodemus asked. "He certainly cannot enter his mother's womb and be born a second time!" "I am telling you the truth," replied Jesus, "that no one can enter the Kingdom of God without being born of water and the Spirit. A person is born physically of human parents, but is born spiritually of the Spirit. Do not be surprised because I tell you that you must all be born again. The wind blows wherever it wishes; you hear the sound it makes, but you do not know where it comes from or where it is going. It is like that with everyone who is born of the Spirit." "How can this be?" asked Nicodemus. Jesus answered, "You are a great teacher in Israel, and you don't know this? I am telling you the truth: we speak of what we know and report what we have seen, yet none of you is willing to accept our message. You do not believe me when I tell you about the things of this world; how will you ever believe me, then, when I tell you about the things of heaven? And no one has ever gone up to heaven except the Son of Man, who came down from heaven."
(Joh 3:1-13)


[link to www.e-sword.net]
gus
User ID: 11099725
Brazil
02/19/2012 06:34 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
it's about the journey, not the destination.

This life is not a means to an end; it already IS the END.

the journey is the purpose. the destination is the illusion. The journey may be going thru a rocky road, but as your legs grow stronger you learn to stop falling.

the biggest mistake of man is assuming that things -- the "effect" -- have to exist for a reason, and that they must have a "cause" which is different / separate from they in themselves. The Cause *is* the Effect -- there is no separation. What brings suffering to man is this eternal quest for meaning , purpose and justification that has nothing to do with Him or what he is experiencing. Experience, not mattering how intense or bad, IS the purpose of Creation. You are here for this purpose, cause this place provides many intense experiences.

once you reach a level you begin to understand that the only real purpose is a lack of one; the only real meaning is a lack of meaning. We are truly happy when we act spontaneously, without all the assumptions and the contrivance to obtain "results" and to reach for "answers". The only answer is no answer; the only answer is silent contemplation; it is learning to sit down , be still, and accept that which IS and not that which you WANT to be. Things are what they are, and they don't NEED any reason to to be. Man suffers greatly because he is always seeking for answers that do not exist. You have to STOP making questions to start KNOWING the answers. Ever seen those students who have to ask about everything during class? What would happen if they would shut up for a while to meditate on finding the answers themselves?

The Truth is right here and now -- it is what it is. Your tendency to desire for something "else", something that will take place "after" this life, and that will probably be "better" -- all of this already creates a separation in your mind, which breeds expectation, anxiety, and hence suffering. This is caused by your subconscious belief in duality still. Besides, suffering is rooted on desire.

This place is the only place to be. You couldn't be in a batter place than here. It's all happening according to the Plan, the Flow, the Higher Good. Your Higher Self will see it through that you go where you need to go. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with the destination, you see? It's only the journey that matters. Make the most of it.

This is an illusion, a distraction, but a VERY necessary one. You must learn to cherish this life as if it was the only one you'll ever have. Technically we are all immortal spirits, but you'll never have another chance to experience this particular arrangement of sensorial inputs with the same intensity. It's like the first time when we hear a song... The first time is never going to be the same experience. Yeap, perhaps when you reach the 5th dimension you will be able to review this life over and over again, but it won't be the same.
gus
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Brazil
02/19/2012 06:39 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
"separate from them in themselves"

sorry for my poor Engrish.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 07:12 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
Totally agree as our spirit is bound to these physical bodies, thus subject to the elements. A pure (free) spirit being placed in a physical body that is subject to the elements taken from its natural spiritual form (pure and not bound), does not sound like a promotion to me. This place is ruled by evil (another sign) and filled with suffering,labor and pain. Yet it is as one would call hell (being doctrinally enfluenced) or it can be observed as the womb.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1330761


Agreed, i know, or would like 2 think that I Am actually an infinite manifestation of divine creation, all existing, all knowing, beautiful and perfect.

But in this life I can't feel a shred of that, I'm just a bloated chemical body full of pains and discomfort, a traumatized mind filled with anger, distrust, trauma, ignorance, longing for truth, divinity, happiness and nevEr ever ever ever obtain it, fuck this trap I want out.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Thats me OP, cause I was in a accident. I had maybe four pain free years of youth and goodlooks, and thats it, Four years from ages 16-20

The rest of my life has been chronic pain and struggle. If it werent for those that cared for me, Id be gone. Theres nothing in this world I really want.
 Quoting: APOLLO ILLUMINATI


Bro I feel ya, i got chronic pain too, it started when i was like 18, i was a junkie on opiates for years afterwards, even injected crack and oxycodone, I've been clean for a year and still nowhere close to being happy, nowhere. There's nothing in this reality i want or look forward to, NOTHING.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


Me as well. I discovered that opiates and painkillers was how we are SUPPOSED to feel 24/7.

Only time someone feels that way naturally is when they are children. This world really lacks the wonder and potential when we grow older.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 10:07 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
it's about the journey, not the destination.

This life is not a means to an end; it already IS the END.

the journey is the purpose. the destination is the illusion. The journey may be going thru a rocky road, but as your legs grow stronger you learn to stop falling.

the biggest mistake of man is assuming that things -- the "effect" -- have to exist for a reason, and that they must have a "cause" which is different / separate from they in themselves. The Cause *is* the Effect -- there is no separation. What brings suffering to man is this eternal quest for meaning , purpose and justification that has nothing to do with Him or what he is experiencing. Experience, not mattering how intense or bad, IS the purpose of Creation. You are here for this purpose, cause this place provides many intense experiences.

once you reach a level you begin to understand that the only real purpose is a lack of one; the only real meaning is a lack of meaning. We are truly happy when we act spontaneously, without all the assumptions and the contrivance to obtain "results" and to reach for "answers". The only answer is no answer; the only answer is silent contemplation; it is learning to sit down , be still, and accept that which IS and not that which you WANT to be. Things are what they are, and they don't NEED any reason to to be. Man suffers greatly because he is always seekinZg for answers that do not exist. You have to STOP making questions to start KNOWING the answers. Ever seen those students who have to ask about everything during class? What would happen if they would shut up for a while to meditate on finding the answers themselves? E

The Truth is right here and now -- it is what it is. Your tendency to desire
for something "else", something that will take place "after" this life, and that will probably be "better" -- all of this already creates a separation in your mind, which breeds expectation, anxiety, and hence suffering. This is caused by your subconscious belief in duality still. Besides, suffering is rooted on desire.

This place is the only place to be. You couldn't be in a batter place than here. It's all happening according to the Plan, the Flow, the Higher Good. Your Higher Self will see it through that you go where you need to go. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with the destination, you see? It's only the journey that matters. Make the most of it.

This is an illusion, a distraction, but a VERY necessary one. You must learn to cherish this life as if it was the only one you'll ever have. Technically we are all immortal spirits, but you'll never have another chance to experience this particular arrangement of sensorial inputs with the same intensity. It's like the first time when we hear a song... The first time is never going to be the same experience. Yeap, perhaps when you reach the5th dimension you will be able to review this life over and over again, but it won't be the same.
 Quoting: gus 11099725



Ok but even knowing this how do i transform it into actual happiness? It's not like I never Thought about what u said, it just doesn't make me feel any better, btw I'm way past using empty new age terms like higher self or 5th dimension, can you honestly vouch for any of those things bein real?

New age let's just you down just like religion, nothing but empty words but no tangible results, I believe in nothing now.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 11:16 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
bump
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 11:54 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
That's right, some to eternal life and others to eternal destruction.
Anonymous Coward
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02/19/2012 11:58 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
22But Jesus said unto him, Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.
Jammer

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02/20/2012 12:01 AM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


You almost have it.

You missed the point of how we may know what death is without life, however.

It's not an illusion.

We all have original thought, but you are correct; we are taught that our thought does not count when it comes to the status quo. You just make yourself an outsider, is all.

You soon forget that because the feeling of needing to belong makes normal logic a thing of the past...

At that point you distance yourself from your better self. The self that knows better. The better part that knows real truths.

You are taught to not only lie to others but to yourself as well...

*Oxy moron here--If you die when you are born how can you escape by dying??? do you then re-die?

Last Edited by Jammer on 02/20/2012 12:04 AM
Your VILLAGE called, their IDIOT is missing.

Your IDIOT called, their VILLAGE is missing.
Anonymous Coward
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02/23/2012 05:26 PM
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Re: Right now were dead, when we die we wake up
We are all dead. Were nothin but a collection of physical memories, stimuli. Our real selves are nowhere near us, who we think we are is not us, it's what we were made into because of our enviroments, parents, peers, the system, etc.

Nobody here has any idea who they were before coming here, what makes you think this is really you?

All you are in this 3d illusion is a thing, a mind and a body, only pertinent to this current life, how the fuck are you truly you?? Everything that's in your mind has been taught to you by external entities, how do you think you know the truth about anything??

The truth is we are all walking dead, we died as soon as we were born, and the only way to wake up is to die and let your essence escape from this horrible body and this horrible illusion, that's the only way. Any thoughts?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5254869


You almost have it.

You missed the point of how we may know what death is without life, however.

It's not an illusion.

We all have original thought, but you are correct; we are taught that our thought does not count when it comes to the status quo. You just make yourself an outsider, is all.

You soon forget that because the feeling of needing to belong makes normal logic a thing of the past...

At that point you distance yourself from your better self. The self that knows better. The better part that knows real truths.

You are taught to not only lie to others but to yourself as well...

*Oxy moron here--If you die when you are born how can you escape by dying??? do you then re-die?
 Quoting: Jammer


You're wrong, we DON'T have original thought, how can you??

Think about this, every.single.thought. in your head has arised or been implanted due to outside factors, every single word, concept, idea, and image that has been absorbed by you, has been put there by an external entity, whether they put it in you, or you stumbled upon it, not a single shred of you has actually come from "you", whatever that actually is.

I am not me, and it kills me, I don't know who the fuck I truly am, who I was before I appeared here, who I will be after it, all I know is I AM NOT ME. I was born, I was raised, I was instructed, I was taught languages, things, even misconceptions, ignorance, hatred, greed, all of that created immense chaos in me, resulting in self-loathing and self-destruction.

Even discussing the nature of the illusion feels phony, what the fuck do I know after all?? We're pretty much androids, we only exist and think we are people because we have bodies and minds with sensory input, we actually don't even truly exist, we're like programmed entities, we think we hurt, we think we're happy, it's all a fucking illusion, I wanna get out of it so bad.

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