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Best comeback I have ever heard!

 
Marax
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User ID: 4103417
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02/25/2012 09:01 PM

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Best comeback I have ever heard!
So my buddy and his wife were fighting when I was in the car with them... She cheats on him, and he drinks a lot.

Hubby: "I want a beer"

Wife: "You can't have a beer your an alcoholic"

Hubby: "Well your a whore and you get laid all the time, Why can't I have a beer"

I kid you not, I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard.
cruise
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1636467
United States
02/25/2012 09:04 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
Thanks for the laugh
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11418351
Portugal
02/25/2012 09:05 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
only in america.

:)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11450691
United States
02/25/2012 09:07 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
Here's one straight from the nuthouse, "that skirt is so short I could hear you comeing".
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:12 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
Here's one straight from the nuthouse, "that skirt is so short I could hear you comeing".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11450691


:dudewtfs:
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1379944
United States
02/25/2012 09:17 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
While that is quite funny.. lol... why is this dude and this chick still together since he knows she cheats on him?

Her ass would be on the curb if I were in his position.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11450691
United States
02/25/2012 09:17 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
Here's one straight from the nuthouse, "that skirt is so short I could hear you comeing".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11450691


:dudewtfs:
 Quoting: Marax


If you could have only seen them. I have more trama to deal with now.
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:19 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
While that is quite funny.. lol... why is this dude and this chick still together since he knows she cheats on him?

Her ass would be on the curb if I were in his position.
 Quoting: Roentgen®


This happened a while ago and they are now divorced...
She got preggo and said she was going to get an abortion if he left...
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10801032
United States
02/25/2012 09:19 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
So my buddy and his wife were fighting when I was in the car with them... She cheats on him, and he drinks a lot.

Hubby: "I want a beer"

Wife: "You can't have a beer your an alcoholic"

Hubby: "Well your a whore and you get laid all the time, Why can't I have a beer"

I kid you not, I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard.
cruise
 Quoting: Marax


The wife should have said, "I'm not a whore! I don't charge anything," and then put her arms around you OP.
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:20 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
So my buddy and his wife were fighting when I was in the car with them... She cheats on him, and he drinks a lot.

Hubby: "I want a beer"

Wife: "You can't have a beer your an alcoholic"

Hubby: "Well your a whore and you get laid all the time, Why can't I have a beer"

I kid you not, I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard.
cruise
 Quoting: Marax


The wife should have said, "I'm not a whore! I don't charge anything," and then put her arms around you OP.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10801032


lol yea right! she was fucking crazy
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
5thwheel

User ID: 3776212
United States
02/25/2012 09:21 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
So my buddy and his wife were fighting when I was in the car with them... She cheats on him, and he drinks a lot.

Hubby: "I want a beer"

Wife: "You can't have a beer your an alcoholic"

Hubby: "Well your a whore and you get laid all the time, Why can't I have a beer"

I kid you not, I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard.
cruise
 Quoting: Marax


Thats real love.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1080525
United States
02/25/2012 09:22 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
Iv said this on here before

'Conversation between you and someone else'

You: Your a dumbass

Them: No, your a dumbass

You: If I wanted my own comeback, I would of wiped it off your mammas chin.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10835773
United States
02/25/2012 09:24 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
reminds me of my country buddy once and his country folk wife. Guy is an ex con, but funny as all hell, and a real good guy..

He was getting on her about never cleaning, "never doin shit", saying she's a worthless whore, saying he has to do all the cleaning.. he was all drunk, she was getting pissed off and was piss drunk herself. to the point where she pulled a gun on him while he was sitting in his chair..

He told her to go ahead and do it, then he said "do it and you're fucked, ain't nobody gonna be here to clean it up"..

I almost died laughing..... How he kept that cool, i dunno..
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

User ID: 11387690
United States
02/25/2012 09:25 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:25 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
reminds me of my country buddy once and his country folk wife. Guy is an ex con, but funny as all hell, and a real good guy..

He was getting on her about never cleaning, "never doin shit", saying she's a worthless whore, saying he has to do all the cleaning.. he was all drunk, she was getting pissed off and was piss drunk herself. to the point where she pulled a gun on him while he was sitting in his chair..

He told her to go ahead and do it, then he said "do it and you're fucked, ain't nobody gonna be here to clean it up"..

I almost died laughing..... How he kept that cool, i dunno..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10835773


roflmeow
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:27 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Yea it was sad. They were just fucking then she got pregnant and held that kid over his head...
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

User ID: 11387690
United States
02/25/2012 09:28 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!

That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Yea it was sad. They were just fucking then she got pregnant and held that kid hostage.

fixed
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 6753462
United States
02/25/2012 09:29 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
While that is quite funny.. lol... why is this dude and this chick still together since he knows she cheats on him?

Her ass would be on the curb if I were in his position.
 Quoting: Roentgen®


He know nobody else wants a drunk. So he stays.
GeekOfTheWeek

User ID: 11223926
United States
02/25/2012 09:30 PM
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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!
That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Me either... I know couple that are like that, and I think to myself wtf is wrong with you two. Then it hits me, they have just been together too long without really communicating.
Pissmeoff
I love physics. It bonds us eternally, it's what makes our computers work, it's what's in my morning cup of coffee, it's the thing that keeps the universe from vanishing due to lack of belief...
Marax (OP)

User ID: 4103417
United States
02/25/2012 09:39 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!

That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Yea it was sad. They were just fucking then she got pregnant and held that kid hostage.

fixed
 Quoting: Marax


I felt bad for the kids, they didnt deserve any of that shit. (she had 2 kids before him)
Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.

I'd like to go quietly in my sleep, like grandpa did. Not screaming in terror like the people in the back seat of the car he was driving.
BRIEF
Rebel with morals

User ID: 11387690
United States
02/25/2012 09:45 PM

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Re: Best comeback I have ever heard!

That's actually more sad than funny...I mean it IS funny, but I don't get how people can live like that.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Yea it was sad. They were just fucking then she got pregnant and held that kid hostage.

fixed
 Quoting: Marax


I felt bad for the kids, they didnt deserve any of that shit. (she had 2 kids before him)
 Quoting: BRIEF


Lost souls stumbling around in the darkness of their lives tripping over every obstacle in their paths...and like you said, the kids suffer for it :(
With freedom comes responsibility.

Heterosexual pride!

Briefcut4892

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