Girlfriends daughter and her boyfriend sleeping together...need input | |
DoomDonkey User ID: 3694521 United States 03/09/2012 01:58 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | #2 If you find it unacceptable, don't allow it. #3 Her daughter is going to get pregnant, and guess where her and the kid are going to live? #4 Bad example for your daughters. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1310640 United States 03/09/2012 01:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | you DO realize that if one of them sees a way to sue you for something, INCLUDING FUTURE CHILD SUPPORT, that they will try that, they boy's parents can sue you and of course some publoic servant can prosecute you as well, all it needs is word on the street. Likely? No, but possible if enough gold diggers and lawyers know. Accusations about gash are as good as cash, to anyone but you, mate.. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12238039 United States 03/09/2012 01:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1622484 United States 03/09/2012 02:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
SHR Forum Administrator 03/09/2012 02:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | First of all GLP is rough place to ask for advice like this...so expect some off the wall bullshit, with that said... Sounds like the adult gf doesn't want the confrontation with the daughter over the situation. Maybe there's some component where she thinks it's going to happen anyway and choose the battle, maybe she doesn't really care, whatever. Either way it is not a good situation to be exposing your much younger daughters to, so it seems like you're trying to be a responsible dad for them. The gf is using her leverage by saying "maybe we'll move out" maybe I'm a hardass, but at that point my response would have been something like, "You won't have to think about it, you're done, pack up and GTFO" Girlfriends come and go, your daughters are your family, do the right thing by them. Sounds like you need to make a stand. There isn't going to be any screwing around in your house with a 17 year old chick and some dude because you have your young daughters to think about. Be a man about it and that is that. The gf will either appreciate and understand, or she isn't worth having as a gf and you're better off with them heading down the road. ____________________________________________________ E-mail anytime [email protected] Inquiring about a ban?, include the IP address found here. [link to www.showmemyip.com] Ooooh, see the fire is sweepin' Our very streets today... Burns like a red coal carpet, Mad bulls lost the way... War, children, it's just a shot away...it's just a shot away.... |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1310640 United States 03/09/2012 02:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Better get your daughters some birth control. Wouldn't you rather know about it, be able to really discuss the situation. Quoting: pigshark 1518596 Don't tell Rush....he'll call them sluts on national radio!!!! only is she asks for strangers to pay for her play, only then is it a literal fact. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1367227 United States 03/09/2012 02:05 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | OP, can you really be so clueless? You're breaking the damned law! Your GF's kid and her boyfriend are minors and because it's your house, you can be busted for corruption of a minor and who knows what else. Count on it, your GF will happily blame you for everything and swear she didn't know about it. A woman who will live in sin in front of her own children is already showing you that she has no standards of decency. You must have sensed this or you'd have married her. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1310640 United States 03/09/2012 02:08 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1412625 Germany 03/09/2012 02:08 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 11908740 Canada 03/09/2012 02:08 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1310640 United States 03/09/2012 02:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | OP, can you really be so clueless? You're breaking the damned law! Your GF's kid and her boyfriend are minors and because it's your house, you can be busted for corruption of a minor and who knows what else. Count on it, your GF will happily blame you for everything and swear she didn't know about it. A woman who will live in sin in front of her own children is already showing you that she has no standards of decency. You must have sensed this or you'd have married her. Quoting: Sweetshrub word, good show! |
Beherenow User ID: 8479003 United States 03/09/2012 02:16 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Some background: I am 47 and my girlfriend is 46. We are both divorced and have been dating for almost 4 years. She and her daughter (17) moved in to my house almost a year ago. Problem: she, my girlfriend, feels it is ok for her daughters boyfriend (of 5 months) to spend night with her in her room...door closed. I have two girls 13 and 15. They are with me half of any given week. I told my girlfriend it is NO WAY acceptable for them to sleep together when my kids are here. I hate to even allow them to sleep together when my kids are not here, but I have acquiesced because she is my girlfriends daughter and don't want to violate boundaries too much. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11476378 I told my gf recently that I don't want them sleeping together at all in my house and she said well maybe we need to move out. Finally...don't give me the "they are going to have sex no matter" story...it's not about that...its about my "non liberal" view of two young people "shacking" up at my house...playing house. The behavior (both by the daughter and by your GF) are is direct disrespect of your views and philosophies on life. If they cannot respect your views, your wishes, and your property then they need to go their own way. Bottom line, and not to seem cold, but it's your house and your rules. If she feels that she needs to move out, then let her. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 3892271 United States 03/09/2012 02:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Some background: I am 47 and my girlfriend is 46. We are both divorced and have been dating for almost 4 years. She and her daughter (17) moved in to my house almost a year ago. Problem: she, my girlfriend, feels it is ok for her daughters boyfriend (of 5 months) to spend night with her in her room...door closed. I have two girls 13 and 15. They are with me half of any given week. I told my girlfriend it is NO WAY acceptable for them to sleep together when my kids are here. I hate to even allow them to sleep together when my kids are not here, but I have acquiesced because she is my girlfriends daughter and don't want to violate boundaries too much. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11476378 I told my gf recently that I don't want them sleeping together at all in my house and she said well maybe we need to move out. Finally...don't give me the "they are going to have sex no matter" story...it's not about that...its about my "non liberal" view of two young people "shacking" up at my house...playing house. The behavior (both by the daughter and by your GF) are is direct disrespect of your views and philosophies on life. If they cannot respect your views, your wishes, and your property then they need to go their own way. Bottom line, and not to seem cold, but it's your house and your rules. If she feels that she needs to move out, then let her. |
Beherenow User ID: 8479003 United States 03/09/2012 02:20 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | OP, can you really be so clueless? You're breaking the damned law! Your GF's kid and her boyfriend are minors and because it's your house, you can be busted for corruption of a minor and who knows what else. Quoting: Sweetshrub This may not be true. First, there is no law in the 50 states that I'm aware of that says you cannot have children that are not of your family stay with you. Second, if you are assuming they are having sex, many states have an age of consent set at 16. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1310640 United States 03/09/2012 02:27 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | OP, can you really be so clueless? You're breaking the damned law! Your GF's kid and her boyfriend are minors and because it's your house, you can be busted for corruption of a minor and who knows what else. Quoting: Sweetshrub This may not be true. First, there is no law in the 50 states that I'm aware of that says you cannot have children that are not of your family stay with you. Second, if you are assuming they are having sex, many states have an age of consent set at 16. Riiiiiiiight, they are working on their maths homework all night long. Then someone misses her monthly... so, who to blame? American jurisprudence is about finding who has the money, and then going for it. Whether it's fines or awards against you, if you are recoverable, more likely you will get sued. The only safe place is to be a broke ass loser with nothing to take, then you are mostly left to whatever you want |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1367227 United States 03/09/2012 02:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | This may not be true. Quoting: Beherenow First, there is no law in the 50 states that I'm aware of that says you cannot have children that are not of your family stay with you. Second, if you are assuming they are having sex, many states have an age of consent set at 16. 'May' not be true? And do you think this babe-in-the-woods of an OP knows which it is? Certainly you have been here long enough to have taken note of our developing police state and our crashing economy, leading many states and counties to bust people indiscriminately in the pursuit of money and property. Local law enforcement can accuse him of running a brothel and take everything he owns. And oh yes, there are restrictions about children staying with you, which can differ from state to state or county to county. Some of my in-laws wanted to send their kids to school in a nearby town and since they lived out in the country, wanted them to stay with other relatives in that town. They couldn't do it until they went and got a 'guardianship' from the court! Needless to say, a talk with legal counsel might save a lot of grief later. In the meantime, OP, be a man and show your slut of a GF the door. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1537731 United States 03/09/2012 02:37 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1067150 United States 03/09/2012 02:45 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You're a hypocrite. Quoting: snarky74 1) Divorced - failed at being a husband 2) Living with someone - your example is consistent with how these teens are living. You have no moral ground. Start living right yourself and then worry about others. IDIOT, this bitch is CLUELESS... First off, NEVER stop asserting your parental authority, regardless of your situation, snarky74 is braindead eh, briandead if they think any parent in question should let loose the reigns, especially teens. STFU snarky ass-goblin |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12179291 United States 03/09/2012 02:47 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Some background: I am 47 and my girlfriend is 46. We are both divorced and have been dating for almost 4 years. She and her daughter (17) moved in to my house almost a year ago. Problem: she, my girlfriend, feels it is ok for her daughters boyfriend (of 5 months) to spend night with her in her room...door closed. I have two girls 13 and 15. They are with me half of any given week. I told my girlfriend it is NO WAY acceptable for them to sleep together when my kids are here. I hate to even allow them to sleep together when my kids are not here, but I have acquiesced because she is my girlfriends daughter and don't want to violate boundaries too much. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11476378 I told my gf recently that I don't want them sleeping together at all in my house and she said well maybe we need to move out. Finally...don't give me the "they are going to have sex no matter" story...it's not about that...its about my "non liberal" view of two young people "shacking" up at my house...playing house. Dude, it's not COOL and it's YOUR house...end of story. Be a MAN and tell your GF...NO WAY! You're not running a F'n brothel. If she doesn't like it?, then tell her she can leave thru the same door she came in. "Hit The Road" Doesn't sound like your GF is a "keeper"...if she was a woman of substance or "quality" then she wouldn't be letting her kids sleep around...especially in the home...whether it be her's or your's. Makes no difference. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12113086 United States 03/09/2012 02:49 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1067150 United States 03/09/2012 02:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Some background: I am 47 and my girlfriend is 46. We are both divorced and have been dating for almost 4 years. She and her daughter (17) moved in to my house almost a year ago. Problem: she, my girlfriend, feels it is ok for her daughters boyfriend (of 5 months) to spend night with her in her room...door closed. I have two girls 13 and 15. They are with me half of any given week. I told my girlfriend it is NO WAY acceptable for them to sleep together when my kids are here. I hate to even allow them to sleep together when my kids are not here, but I have acquiesced because she is my girlfriends daughter and don't want to violate boundaries too much. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11476378 I told my gf recently that I don't want them sleeping together at all in my house and she said well maybe we need to move out. Finally...don't give me the "they are going to have sex no matter" story...it's not about that...its about my "non liberal" view of two young people "shacking" up at my house...playing house. Dude, it's not COOL and it's YOUR house...end of story. Be a MAN and tell your GF...NO WAY! You're not running a F'n brothel. If she doesn't like it?, then tell her she can leave thru the same door she came in. "Hit The Road" Doesn't sound like your GF is a "keeper"...if she was a woman of substance or "quality" then she wouldn't be letting her kids sleep around...especially in the home...whether it be her's or your's. Makes no difference. Yeah, the mother sounds like she lets the daughter dictate how life goes, so many mothers that are like that, never asserting parental authority. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1367227 United States 03/09/2012 02:52 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Riiiiiiiight, they are working on their maths homework Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1310640 all night long. Then someone misses her monthly... so, who to blame? American jurisprudence is about finding who has the money, and then going for it. Whether it's fines or awards against you, if you are recoverable, more likely you will get sued. The only safe place is to be a broke ass loser with nothing to take, then you are mostly left to whatever you want There you have it! It's scary, the ignorance on this thread, and from people who are supposed to be savvy and paranoid too. When OP tries to dump the GF, she might sue him anyway. Has anyone (else) here ever heard of a palimony suit? Then, just for spite, she can add in the corruption of a minor. OP will lose all he has in attorney fees just trying to defend himself. If she weren't after what he has, why is she living with him and bringing her offspring with her too? Has she no home of her own? Now here's some advice, for the lot of you: Never trust to the decency of people who have shown you they don't have any. Don't move people into your house unless you are getting married. They can still steal you blind and if you let them stay over 90 days, you might have a hell of a time getting them out again. Check the laws of your state pertaining to these matters before considering living with anyone. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12179291 United States 03/09/2012 02:52 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You're a hypocrite. Quoting: snarky74 1) Divorced - failed at being a husband 2) Living with someone - your example is consistent with how these teens are living. You have no moral ground. Start living right yourself and then worry about others. Wow, Nice reversal there. Can't tell you'r a woman. Make it all the guys' fault. Never mind that his GF has FAILED at a marriage too and is the one who's under-aged daughter is the one fucking under this man's roof all the while he has two youngsters? You're messed-up. |
KimsThankful User ID: 12230704 United States 03/09/2012 02:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If it were HER house, I would stay out of it. It wouldn't be any of your business. Since it is your house, lay down the rules. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 889193 Yup this! Go figure as to why society is such a mess these days.. Unless you want that TV show 16 and pregnant filming at your house I would definitely be laying down the law... your daughters will be next if you don't! Agreed. It's your house and you have to think about your own daughters first. Good luck, OP! BTW, we have three teenage sons and my husband is of the mind that "they're gonna do it anyway..." Grrrr! |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12243419 United States 03/09/2012 02:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Some background: I am 47 and my girlfriend is 46. We are both divorced and have been dating for almost 4 years. She and her daughter (17) moved in to my house almost a year ago. Problem: she, my girlfriend, feels it is ok for her daughters boyfriend (of 5 months) to spend night with her in her room...door closed. I have two girls 13 and 15. They are with me half of any given week. I told my girlfriend it is NO WAY acceptable for them to sleep together when my kids are here. I hate to even allow them to sleep together when my kids are not here, but I have acquiesced because she is my girlfriends daughter and don't want to violate boundaries too much. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11476378 I told my gf recently that I don't want them sleeping together at all in my house and she said well maybe we need to move out. Finally...don't give me the "they are going to have sex no matter" story...it's not about that...its about my "non liberal" view of two young people "shacking" up at my house...playing house. Your living with your girlfriend, not married correct? Obviously your views aren't very non-liberal. That's what I like about those conservatives.....do as I say not as I do!!! |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12243419 United States 03/09/2012 02:57 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You're a hypocrite. Quoting: snarky74 1) Divorced - failed at being a husband 2) Living with someone - your example is consistent with how these teens are living. You have no moral ground. Start living right yourself and then worry about others. Wow, Nice reversal there. Can't tell you'r a woman. Make it all the guys' fault. Never mind that his GF has FAILED at a marriage too and is the one who's under-aged daughter is the one fucking under this man's roof all the while he has two youngsters? You're messed-up. It is the man's place to ask her to marry him.......be a man and ask!! |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 12179291 United States 03/09/2012 02:58 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Better get your daughters some birth control. Wouldn't you rather know about it, be able to really discuss the situation. Quoting: pigshark 1518596 What? Are you stupid? Christ, he already knows that they're fucking...every teen does. DUH!!!! The point is OP doesn't want it happening in HIS house! Especially between minors whe have NO CLUE at all what real-love is. I'm sure that the daughter will have many lovers in her younger years. Is OP supposed to keep letting it happen. Got it now?! |
Lemon User ID: 5766356 United States 03/09/2012 02:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You are responsible to protect your 13 & 15 year old. Kick your GF & her daughter out. If it ends the relationship that's the cost of raising your own teenagers with the values you want them to observe and have. **I'm all out of bubblegum |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 8371868 United States 03/09/2012 03:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I was sleeping in the same bed as my girlfriend when I was 16. My parents didn't care, and they're 70 year old libertarians. They said age of consent was 16, and within 4 years is the romeo and juliet law in PA. They said it was my right to do as I wished, though they would highly suggest that I obtain protection if we were going further, because if I got her knocked up, I was out the door. Seriously OP, this isn't worth fucking up a living situation/relationship, all you're going to do is make them dislike you and grow distant. The aim of being a parental figure is to teach. It's gonna happen anyways, in your house or not, but instead of huffing steam over what happens under your roof, you should try having a talk with them both about being safe. I'd rather have teens fucking in my home safely than have teens fucking in a car without a condom because they didn't wanna buy them or something, and then 9 months later get dragged into caring for a child that is not my own. That's just me, but I also don't intend to get divorced and be dating in my late 40s again either. You don't just keep getting chances that late in life at happiness :( |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 8371868 United States 03/09/2012 03:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If it were HER house, I would stay out of it. It wouldn't be any of your business. Since it is your house, lay down the rules. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 889193 Yup this! Go figure as to why society is such a mess these days.. Unless you want that TV show 16 and pregnant filming at your house I would definitely be laying down the law... your daughters will be next if you don't! Agreed. It's your house and you have to think about your own daughters first. Good luck, OP! BTW, we have three teenage sons and my husband is of the mind that "they're gonna do it anyway..." Grrrr! They are. lol. |