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Are you an Introvert?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1933503
United States
03/16/2012 06:01 PM
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Are you an Introvert?
All of my life, especially at work people (with good intentions) try to *fix* me or make me be like them. They think im antisocial when I just need time to myself to re-energize. It almost feels like a constant struggle. Any of you introverts out there feel like there in the same situation? What do you do about it? without trying to pretend to be like everyone else? Because Ive tried so hard to be extroverted and its just not working, but when im myself it almost feels like people look down on introverts... I also think this is an american thing.

I love social activities but just not every day like most people do. Being introverted feels like having a BIG RED TARGET on my back... Now, I know in japan and other places that introversion is more of the norm and not looked down upon like your some kind of freak. I do know that introverts are pretty intelligent people, we're just not accepted as the social norm... Most people think I hate them or that im an asshole just because i dont want to talk about stuff that means nothing lol. So thats why alot of people give me a hard time, I just think they dont understand introverted people. Does anyone get where im coming from? Its not that I dont like them, its so hard to explain!

I think 25% or something like that is introverted people. The only option I see that can help ease the problem is if I *pretend to be extroverted but doing that means that Im not really being myself and that doesnt feel natural.

Does anyone understand where Im coming from?
Thanks. SmileyGlas
Yitro

User ID: 10855647
United States
03/16/2012 06:05 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I'm an introvert, you'll enjoy this video OP.


For having lived long, I have experienced many instances of being obliged, by better information or fuller consideration, to change opinions, even on important subjects, which I once thought right but found to be otherwise. - Benjamin Franklin
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12425725
United States
03/16/2012 06:07 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Intorvert personalities often possess hidden potential that is meant to be harnessed at an appointed time.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10281109
United States
03/16/2012 06:09 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Yup , Im introverted and people tend to think im weird because I don't seem to join in on their meaningless conversations about BS most people talk about .Since always and im 19 now , and when I pretend to be extroverted (for work when I was an entertainer) it was so exhausting every night after work.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9780633
United States
03/16/2012 06:11 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Take the Meyers Briggs test ... introversion has a different meaning.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10281109
United States
03/16/2012 06:15 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
All of my life, especially at work people (with good intentions) try to *fix* me or make me be like them. They think im antisocial when I just need time to myself to re-energize. It almost feels like a constant struggle. Any of you introverts out there feel like there in the same situation? What do you do about it? without trying to pretend to be like everyone else? Because Ive tried so hard to be extroverted and its just not working, but when im myself it almost feels like people look down on introverts... I also think this is an american thing.

I love social activities but just not every day like most people do. Being introverted feels like having a BIG RED TARGET on my back... Now, I know in japan and other places that introversion is more of the norm and not looked down upon like your some kind of freak. I do know that introverts are pretty intelligent people, we're just not accepted as the social norm... Most people think I hate them or that im an asshole just because i dont want to talk about stuff that means nothing lol. So thats why alot of people give me a hard time, I just think they dont understand introverted people. Does anyone get where im coming from? Its not that I dont like them, its so hard to explain!

I think 25% or something like that is introverted people. The only option I see that can help ease the problem is if I *pretend to be extroverted but doing that means that Im not really being myself and that doesnt feel natural.

Does anyone understand where Im coming from?
Thanks. SmileyGlas
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1933503


I also had a teacher in the 4th grade(who the previous years before was a "gifted" teacher who worked with "gifted" children) Insited that I had a psycological problem because I never played with the other kids in my class and just kept to myself.

Then at that time (never previous thinking I had anything wrong with me ) I though all of sudden there was something wrong with me at 9 years old because of this lady. Then I grew up realized how fcked up that was . Then I started hating school and being around people in general.

Now I spend my time educating myself on stuff I didn't learn in school and I don't even have to be around other people who think that im weird.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12142824
Canada
03/16/2012 06:19 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Yes, the USA is the country that values extroversion more than anywhere else on the planet.

Asian countries value introversion above extroversion. Most other countries are somewhere in the middle.

Try to find a job that doesn't require much extroverted activity. Find friends and a partner that are at least somewhat introverted.

Extroverts will always bully others to be like themselves. They don't see it as bullying. They have so much externalized energy they just can't help themselves. They are happy with the way they are and they like to bounce off of each other energetically all day long. Being by themselves or thinking too much makes them anxious. They assume the same about you, and they also don't like it when they try to bounce off you and you're not bouncy, but stiff. Even though you like being the way you are, they just don't get it, and they don't really like it. They can be perfectly well-meaning, but chances are, you won't have too many very close friends that are extroverts, because you just don't think the same way and they just don't know how not to be overly pushy.

By the way, it seems like there are more extroverts than introverts in the world, especially in the USA, but that's only because they make so much noise, insist on being the center of attention, etc etc. There are actually slightly more introverts than extroverts.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 354968
United States
03/16/2012 06:32 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I'm an introvert who is married to an extrovert. We complement each other. Over the years I've learned to push myself outside my comfort zone of socializing but I still feel the most comfortable at home:) Just be happy with who Gid created you to be. I believe that we introverts are very special people. I know that my husband likes me just the way that I am.

I can't embed off my iPad, but YouTube, mister Rogers it's you I like
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 8958000
Canada
03/16/2012 06:35 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I'm an introvert who is married to an extrovert. We complement each other. Over the years I've learned to push myself outside my comfort zone of socializing but I still feel the most comfortable at home:) Just be happy with who Gid created you to be. I believe that we introverts are very special people. I know that my husband likes me just the way that I am.

I can't embed off my iPad, but YouTube, mister Rogers it's you I like
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 354968


Who is Gid?
Fuck Jobby

User ID: 12143928
United Kingdom
03/16/2012 06:44 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
If you are an introvert then be an introvert! Except from those stupid as fuck 'social norms', who says you shouldn't be?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 1933503
United States
03/16/2012 06:56 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Yes, the USA is the country that values extroversion more than anywhere else on the planet.

Asian countries value introversion above extroversion. Most other countries are somewhere in the middle.

Try to find a job that doesn't require much extroverted activity. Find friends and a partner that are at least somewhat introverted.

Extroverts will always bully others to be like themselves. They don't see it as bullying. They have so much externalized energy they just can't help themselves. They are happy with the way they are and they like to bounce off of each other energetically all day long. Being by themselves or thinking too much makes them anxious. They assume the same about you, and they also don't like it when they try to bounce off you and you're not bouncy, but stiff. Even though you like being the way you are, they just don't get it, and they don't really like it. They can be perfectly well-meaning, but chances are, you won't have too many very close friends that are extroverts, because you just don't think the same way and they just don't know how not to be overly pushy.

By the way, it seems like there are more extroverts than introverts in the world, especially in the USA, but that's only because they make so much noise, insist on being the center of attention, etc etc. There are actually slightly more introverts than extroverts.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 12142824



The MAIN difference I see is that extroverts love attention it seems and when they see that I don't *Thrive* on attention like they do, they think I have a problem and I need to be fixed somehow. I don't mind attention every now and then but I can live life without receiving or giving attention if I need too. I can see how this would come of as being an asshole but that is definitely not what im trying to get across by ANY MEANS!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11975378
United States
03/16/2012 06:58 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
A lot of jobs will not hire introverts because they think they will be antisocial and not work well with others. I work in a sales job and as an introvert I had to teach myself to be extroverted around others during my work hours so I can appear to be interested and sociable and likable. But it is exhausting. What comes naturally to the extroverts I have to work hard at every single day. I've come to think of it as acting. Some days I'm better at it and some days I just can't sync up with others and make a connection using meaningless banter. But I'm getting better over time. But the extra mental exertion needed does wear me out at the end of the day. :(
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 1933503
United States
03/16/2012 06:59 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I'm an introvert who is married to an extrovert. We complement each other. Over the years I've learned to push myself outside my comfort zone of socializing but I still feel the most comfortable at home:) Just be happy with who Gid created you to be. I believe that we introverts are very special people. I know that my husband likes me just the way that I am.

I can't embed off my iPad, but YouTube, mister Rogers it's you I like
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 354968


Oh believe me I've tried to push myself out my comfort zone all my life... In simple terms, it just doesn't work because its not who I am. I learned the hard way.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11866219
United States
03/16/2012 07:00 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I've posted re this article before .. The Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts.

This part got me the most ..

"4. Introverts need time alone to recharge.

Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.

They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries."

[link to briankim.net]

Because like you I am always utterly exhausted after being around groups of people for more than 3 hours but apparently our brains are wired differently and we recharge by being alone whereas they recharge by being around people. So they think there is something terribly wrong with us that we love being alone. I've tried to explain this to family members who think I'm antisocial but they just don't get it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11685129
United States
03/16/2012 07:00 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
im an omnivert.

depending on my program, im flexible.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10223986
United States
03/16/2012 07:08 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
i used to identify as being an introvert. I conquered it. but my natural state is not to be "around a lot of people"...i would rather read a book or watch a movie...or maybe be with someone who really knows me well...


-- but, after a lot of years and expereince...ive come to the conclusion. that , i really, just dont like most people....i see through them, and the games and angles they play....i dont like it.


and it has only got worse, since every girl grew up with day time televsion and the reality tv thing. big brother, survivor, etc etc....

everybody is playing little games.....they love it. they get off on it..

i cant stand it .
BOWMAN

User ID: 1403418
United States
03/16/2012 07:11 PM

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Re: Are you an Introvert?
Yes, but not that I don't want to express outwardly in social circles. It's just hard to find the right people to hang with because of social differences that I have. At work I need to keep up good rapport with customers so that helps maintain things in a way.


------
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H&W P401 Recip./Parson's Turbine Cold Start

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The Real You

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Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 1933503
United States
03/16/2012 07:18 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
A lot of jobs will not hire introverts because they think they will be antisocial and not work well with others. I work in a sales job and as an introvert I had to teach myself to be extroverted around others during my work hours so I can appear to be interested and sociable and likable. But it is exhausting. What comes naturally to the extroverts I have to work hard at every single day. I've come to think of it as acting. Some days I'm better at it and some days I just can't sync up with others and make a connection using meaningless banter. But I'm getting better over time. But the extra mental exertion needed does wear me out at the end of the day. :(
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11975378


I know EXACTLY where your coming from. At 1 point in my life I made myself be a total extrovert for 3 long months... And the same thing that is happening to you happened to me. I would come home Completely drained/in a bad mood/agitated because I had to "act" like being an extrovert. It was a challenge to say the least.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12622098
United Kingdom
03/16/2012 07:21 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
i used to identify as being an introvert. I conquered it. but my natural state is not to be "around a lot of people"...i would rather read a book or watch a movie...or maybe be with someone who really knows me well...


-- but, after a lot of years and expereince...ive come to the conclusion. that , i really, just dont like most people....i see through them, and the games and angles they play....i dont like it.


and it has only got worse, since every girl grew up with day time televsion and the reality tv thing. big brother, survivor, etc etc....

everybody is playing little games.....they love it. they get off on it..

i cant stand it .
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10223986


There's a mob of these types where I work.

They're always chattering in loud voices, and they all have accounts with Facefuck and Twatter, that they religious update every evening.

God, I wish they'd just get fired, or at least keep it down to a dull roar.

pennywise
oOO
User ID: 12631730
Aruba
03/16/2012 07:25 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
A lot of jobs will not hire introverts because they think they will be antisocial and not work well with others. I work in a sales job and as an introvert I had to teach myself to be extroverted around others during my work hours so I can appear to be interested and sociable and likable. But it is exhausting. What comes naturally to the extroverts I have to work hard at every single day. I've come to think of it as acting. Some days I'm better at it and some days I just can't sync up with others and make a connection using meaningless banter. But I'm getting better over time. But the extra mental exertion needed does wear me out at the end of the day. :(
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11975378


OMG.. i could of write that..fuck consumption driven buyers.
Hate it but it isnt a good tim to switch jobs,i rather be around animals.
Or just my wife and kid.
Nothing wrong with that actually..hf


Peace
Gingy

User ID: 12617540
Canada
03/16/2012 07:38 PM

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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I am an Introvert. It's hard to be around people, especially at work when they expect you to be "bubbly". I hate gossip, I don't watch TV, I hate sports- honestly I don't have much to talk to people about. I usually don't talk unless I need to. :)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12202251
United States
03/16/2012 08:38 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I've posted re this article before .. The Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts.

This part got me the most ..

"4. Introverts need time alone to recharge.

Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.

They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries."

[link to briankim.net]

Because like you I am always utterly exhausted after being around groups of people for more than 3 hours but apparently our brains are wired differently and we recharge by being alone whereas they recharge by being around people. So they think there is something terribly wrong with us that we love being alone. I've tried to explain this to family members who think I'm antisocial but they just don't get it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11866219


^^^ This, I need time to re energize. Social gatherings I feel like I have to entertain you, feel the air with noise so you don't feel uncomfortable. But it's work, because I don't care about the mind numbing,he said she said gossip or look at me I need your attention, pleeeease let me fit in with the group I can be funny, but let us not talk about anything of substance, that's the death nail of social gatherings, just make me laugh and be my friend on facebook oh and make sure you text me as much bs as you can and be sure to foreword to all my contacts...thx.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12192140
United States
03/16/2012 09:39 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I think that extroverts have more self-confidence than their ability deserves. They frequently wind up as the boss over more capable people.
TN

User ID: 1298001
United States
03/16/2012 09:42 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I'm an introvert. You wouldn't believe the amount of flack I've gotten for it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 12641832
Australia
03/16/2012 09:58 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I think that extroverts have more self-confidence than their ability deserves. They frequently wind up as the boss over more capable people.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 12192140



if youre saying extroverts are backstabbing brown nosers, i have to agree
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 2200644
Mexico
03/16/2012 10:10 PM
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Re: Are you an Introvert?
I know right, I especially felt identified with the *pretending to be extrovert part because that's what I mostly do, I mean, I can be very talkative, play jokes and have a good laugh about something absurd just for the fun of it when I feel good, in a confort zone with certain people, but that all leaves me with a fatigue feeling, like I need some time alone to, say, "recharge" myself to be ready for a new day. Not that I like to be alone all the time, though...

It's annoying when, for example, people is so shocked if I don't have an excitement attack when they talk about having a party, it's like I don't enjoy the strident, shitty music and dancing and so on, but if I say that, it's like I had said something in a foreign language...

I don't think that extrovert-praising trend is American-only but rather a Western World one...

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