The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
Where “WWW” means “Wretched Writers Welcome”

Since 1982 the English Department at San Jose State University has sponsored the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a whimsical literary competition that challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels.

The winner of the 2012 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is Cathy Bryant of Manchester, England.

"As he told her that he loved her she gazed into his eyes, wondering, as she noted the infestation of eyelash mites, the tiny deodicids burrowing into his follicles to eat the greasy sebum therein, each female laying up to 25 eggs in a single follicle, causing inflammation, whether the eyes are truly the windows of the soul; and, if so, his soul needed regrouting."
— Cathy Bryant, Manchester, England

Much more here: [link to www.bulwer-lytton.com]