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Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1885697
United States
07/12/2012 10:29 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
All I can say is I drove into manhattan yesterday for a haircut and I am kicking myself for not stopping and double parking and getting that pizza. Damn it!! And no not sexually frustrated. Just pizza frustrated!! I'll send you some new York pizza op
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 846701
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07/12/2012 10:34 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Bitches put no effort into anything anymore, they want everything handed to them. I fire a secretary every 3 months because all of them can't properly route a phone call, or feel the clients needs, if they're agitated, calm, nothing. They constantly turn away the wrong people and ruin my business if I don't keep a tight leash on them. I can't find a secretary worth shit anymore and basically have to do their job for them. What the hell happened to those old time secretaries that were able to make appointments for me, route calls properly and understand the basics of accounting? I even kept one for a whole year, training one, supposedly Harvard educated psychologist, bitch didn't amount to shit. You people have no clue how many women ruin businesses.

Every bitch that tells me they're so stressed out because of kids and school, I tell them I'm fucking stressed out because I have to pick up the slack from everyone that can't do their fucking job, you go home after your 8 hour shift, I don't even stop working when I go home because I'm trying to get money to fucking pay your damn salary so you can go home to feed your fucking kids and suck your new boyfriends dick.

I'm going to end up hiring a gay guy as suggested by friends, supposedly they do the jobs women can't do anymore.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 846701


What kind of business requires "feeling" the clients? tounge
 Quoting: Oldmotherhubbard


One that requires knowing if the client is important vs. some shady salesman.
Anonymous Coward
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07/12/2012 10:41 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
i want pizza really bad now...how do you make your dough and sauce?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19448280


Call Dominos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Papa John's!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ledos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wake Up
Let Me Off This Crazy Ride!!

User ID: 407421
United States
07/12/2012 10:57 PM

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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
:StickThisPizzaUp:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16423250
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07/12/2012 10:57 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
I urge you to try the following on a pizza! Yum!

[link to www.youtube.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16423250
United States
07/12/2012 11:04 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Go to Paizano's!



Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1550123
United States
07/12/2012 11:12 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Bitches put no effort into anything anymore, they want everything handed to them. I fire a secretary every 3 months because all of them can't properly route a phone call, or feel the clients needs, if they're agitated, calm, nothing. They constantly turn away the wrong people and ruin my business if I don't keep a tight leash on them. I can't find a secretary worth shit anymore and basically have to do their job for them. What the hell happened to those old time secretaries that were able to make appointments for me, route calls properly and understand the basics of accounting? I even kept one for a whole year, training one, supposedly Harvard educated psychologist, bitch didn't amount to shit. You people have no clue how many women ruin businesses.

Every bitch that tells me they're so stressed out because of kids and school, I tell them I'm fucking stressed out because I have to pick up the slack from everyone that can't do their fucking job, you go home after your 8 hour shift, I don't even stop working when I go home because I'm trying to get money to fucking pay your damn salary so you can go home to feed your fucking kids and suck your new boyfriends dick.

I'm going to end up hiring a gay guy as suggested by friends, supposedly they do the jobs women can't do anymore.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 846701


And if you keep that attitude you will never find a good one. Male of female. Look up the Law of Attraction. And calm down. You are a heart attack waiting to happen.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1550123
United States
07/12/2012 11:14 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
All I can say is I drove into manhattan yesterday for a haircut and I am kicking myself for not stopping and double parking and getting that pizza. Damn it!! And no not sexually frustrated. Just pizza frustrated!! I'll send you some new York pizza op
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1885697


I think OP is banned. Like 3 or more times.LOL
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 18462886
Canada
07/12/2012 11:16 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Cheddar is fine, I don't see anything wrong with cheddar on pizza??
 Quoting: Philligan



I told you what a real pizza is...

dough

must have wheat flour
rye flour
malt flour
corn meal
yeast
mixed and aged for 2 days

opened and stretched and "proofed" ( allowed to rise at room temp )

high fat really low water content mozza

good quality BEEF pepperoni

( add your own other toppings but!- this alone will change your mind about what a "real" pizza is )

San Marzano crushed tomato for sauce ( maybe a little garlic )

cook on a stone at 700degrees ++ ( old fashioned huge stone pizza oven best)

that's a "REAL" pizza

thread now closed.........
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19649161
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07/12/2012 11:18 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Sweetshrub

User ID: 19569382
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07/12/2012 11:27 PM

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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Bitches put no effort into anything anymore, they want everything handed to them. I fire a secretary every 3 months because all of them can't properly route a phone call, or feel the clients needs, if they're agitated, calm, nothing. They constantly turn away the wrong people and ruin my business if I don't keep a tight leash on them. I can't find a secretary worth shit anymore and basically have to do their job for them. What the hell happened to those old time secretaries that were able to make appointments for me, route calls properly and understand the basics of accounting? I even kept one for a whole year, training one, supposedly Harvard educated psychologist, bitch didn't amount to shit. You people have no clue how many women ruin businesses.

Every bitch that tells me they're so stressed out because of kids and school, I tell them I'm fucking stressed out because I have to pick up the slack from everyone that can't do their fucking job, you go home after your 8 hour shift, I don't even stop working when I go home because I'm trying to get money to fucking pay your damn salary so you can go home to feed your fucking kids and suck your new boyfriends dick.

I'm going to end up hiring a gay guy as suggested by friends, supposedly they do the jobs women can't do anymore.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 846701


And if you keep that attitude you will never find a good one. Male of female. Look up the Law of Attraction. And calm down. You are a heart attack waiting to happen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1550123

Don't you think it better that he does not calm down and we let nature take its course here? Some people just need to go away and cease spewing foulness at all the rest of us just trying to get through life peacefully.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1550123
United States
07/12/2012 11:30 PM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Bitches put no effort into anything anymore, they want everything handed to them. I fire a secretary every 3 months because all of them can't properly route a phone call, or feel the clients needs, if they're agitated, calm, nothing. They constantly turn away the wrong people and ruin my business if I don't keep a tight leash on them. I can't find a secretary worth shit anymore and basically have to do their job for them. What the hell happened to those old time secretaries that were able to make appointments for me, route calls properly and understand the basics of accounting? I even kept one for a whole year, training one, supposedly Harvard educated psychologist, bitch didn't amount to shit. You people have no clue how many women ruin businesses.

Every bitch that tells me they're so stressed out because of kids and school, I tell them I'm fucking stressed out because I have to pick up the slack from everyone that can't do their fucking job, you go home after your 8 hour shift, I don't even stop working when I go home because I'm trying to get money to fucking pay your damn salary so you can go home to feed your fucking kids and suck your new boyfriends dick.

I'm going to end up hiring a gay guy as suggested by friends, supposedly they do the jobs women can't do anymore.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 846701


And if you keep that attitude you will never find a good one. Male of female. Look up the Law of Attraction. And calm down. You are a heart attack waiting to happen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1550123

Don't you think it better that he does not calm down and we let nature take its course here? Some people just need to go away and cease spewing foulness at all the rest of us just trying to get through life peacefully.
 Quoting: Sweetshrub


Yeah, one part of me would like to do that and hope no one else gets abused by him. But I figured I might warn him/educate him. People can change. Hopefully he will.
Sweetshrub

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07/12/2012 11:41 PM

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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Yeah, one part of me would like to do that and hope no one else gets abused by him. But I figured I might warn him/educate him. People can change. Hopefully he will.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1550123

Alas, kind young person, most people do not change, or can. Our personalities are formed before we ever reach puberty. Everything we learn after that is 'inventory,' just getting acquainted with what's in the bag we were given, ways of dealing with it and particularly: ways of hiding it, when necessary or convenient. We certainly have the choice to develop our best qualities, possibly even to the extent that they quite outshine our lesser. What parts of us we want to identify most strongly with are also up to us. But, habit has a grip of iron stronger than any compulsion from outside influence and my guess is that this subject values the (dubious) comfort of that familiarity more than he does that tiny glimmer of light from an unfamiliar open door. Being 'right' in his assessments, at least to himself, is more important than being free.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19656417
United States
07/13/2012 12:04 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
the next thing you lazy ass, tasteless, passionless, talentless "modern" american vermin will do is take a damned piece of foam bread, put ketchup on as sauce, velveeta or "cheese food" on as cheese, chop up nasty ass hotdogs as the "meat" and call that a pizza. Your screaming brats will have tantrums if they dont get this travesty every other day.

I wouldnt put it past you!

Is there no low for you?

God has Fled you!
Sweetshrub

User ID: 19569382
United States
07/13/2012 12:53 AM

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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
the next thing you lazy ass, tasteless, passionless, talentless "modern" american vermin will do is take a damned piece of foam bread, put ketchup on as sauce, velveeta or "cheese food" on as cheese, chop up nasty ass hotdogs as the "meat" and call that a pizza. Your screaming brats will have tantrums if they dont get this travesty every other day.

I wouldnt put it past you!

Is there no low for you?

God has Fled you!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19656417

And bumped into the devil with a proprietary hand on your shoulder on His way out the door...
Well, now this is a bit better, at least fit for a response from polite company. So, why don't you marshal your vituperations and vitriol for the likes of Monsanto, the 'franken-foodies?' Those, are not Italians, in case you didn't already know that, not even Calabrians :) but they are definitely assholes and need to be stopped.

What a lurid flight of fancy that menu is! Imagine, if you will, a few eggs and one could sprinkle that mess on top, bake it in one's cute toaster oven.... finish off with some 'longhorn' cheddar cheese sliced like those checkered pieces of pie crust.....and call it a frittata! Wash it down with a quart or two of Colt 45 and you have the American suburban experience down perfectly. Oh, this is the modern, 'economic depression-version' of it, of course.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
07/13/2012 01:17 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Give up the nasty dairy products and reduce your cancer/heart disease risk.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1471791
United States
07/13/2012 01:22 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Calm the fuck down.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
United States
07/13/2012 01:47 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
What the fuck is "Prue-made"??
 Quoting: VERDICT


made by the girl on that witch show

charmed?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
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07/13/2012 01:52 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
I agree cheddar goes on mexican stuff, not italian stuff. cheddar type cheeses, fake or real do not belong on lasagna either
 Quoting: Nobody in Particular


mexican is goat cheese you no cookin' bitch

good queso
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
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07/13/2012 01:54 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
my sweet vegetarian combo:

Thin crust, wheat
Green Peppers
Baby Portabella mushrooms
Sweet Vidalia Onions
Pineapple
Mozzerella Cheese or Italian 4-cheese blend
Non-MSG/HFCS/Sugar sauce
Parmesan cheese dusting (optional)
Italian herb

^ Yummmm
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1611518


gluten is worse than tasty meat products
Sweetshrub

User ID: 19569382
United States
07/13/2012 01:55 AM

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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Give up the nasty dairy products and reduce your cancer/heart disease risk.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19660505

Poor Pasteur, with the best of intentions, really cooked our goose with that business, didn't he? Scald out the enzymes and now we don't have any to digest the stuff. Milk's not real milk anymore and wheat has been 'modified' and now has turned on us. That said, do you really think it prudent for us two to expound on the virtues of paleo and raw vegan, here, and then have everybody on the thread on our asses?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
United States
07/13/2012 02:06 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
italian food is overrated
everything appears to be based around 3 ingredients

pasta, tomatoes and some kind of cheese

pesto (gag!), risotto (stodge), and dont get me started on fucking pinenuts!

tiramisu is horrible, zabaglione is horrible

give me greek!
i hate soccer moms though. i am a mother myself, but am the antithesis of the church-going, cheesy family photo christmas card sending, bobbed hair wearing, chardonnay swilling, 4x4 driving whilst using a phone bores!

OP is still a twat though
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 18558820


are you serious?

pesto....wonderful

"tiramisu is horrible, zabaglione is horrible"

seriously??????

"give me greek!"

here ya go sideways
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
United States
07/13/2012 02:20 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
dont you fucks have any passion at all to understand this post?

you stupid fat lazy morons are brain dead and your hearts run on caffiene and other synthetic chemicals made by pfizer. you suck!

These soccer mom twits are idiots and useless. thats the point of this post. The USA is over, because of luke warm, apathetic self entitled, lazy, assholes.

now FUCK YOU if you dont get it. If you dont get it you are part of the problem.

AND DONT PUT JUST CHEDDAR ON A PIZZA. Make an effort damn you!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19633154


I agree with how you put it. Italians can get touchy about cooking, at least the American ones. My GF luckily can cook, both her and I are Italian. Not all Italians have dark tans and a swarthy look. She is a light skinned redhead, she does tan and it looks very interesting :)
I am a Blondie, I tan golden. We both can trace our history and families back well before the boat.

Probably OP went to a friends house or in laws. It is just a waste of food if you half-ass everything when that little extra bit of effort makes all the difference.

1. The trick to creating a good dough/crust for the pizza or anything for that matter is letting it proof overnight in the fridge covered up after it rose twice.
It should be slightly sticky.

2. I use both whole wheat flour and white flour, I have tried cake flour as well *simply a finer grade, not sweet*.
Yeast must be activated before with a drop of honey in the warm water, this makes the yeast go nuts.
Do not use a rolling pin, stretch or toss by hand. The pizza doesn't have to be a circle either.

3. Bake the pizza at the highest temp your oven will go.
Keep an eye on it.

4. Melting cheeses not hard cheeses. I have used ricotta, provolone, mozzarella *fake and real stuff, the real stuff if you can get it is wet and is made from buffalo milk*,
peccarino, stracchino, fontina, and gorgonzola.
Less is more.

5. Sauce can be a real secret recipe, complicated or as simple as crushed sweet tomatoes with a bit of Italian spices.
I prefer the simple approach.
Some swear by simple olive oil then crushed tomatoes.

6. Toppings should be healthy and fresh. Grilled meats work awesome if it is chicken, sausage, ham, smoked on the grill salami or pepperoni fronzino *not the American pepperoni but if thats what you got, its what you got*.
Less is more.
I like lots of fresh veggies on mine, tomatoes, peppers, onions.
Yum.
Fresh basil, oregano, cilantro are all good as toppings by and of themselves.

7. Olive oil, crushed garlic rubbed along the outside of the crust before baking makes it... well try it.
You will be in love.

Easy dough recipe, the most basic.

1 pkg of yeast
1 1/4 cup very warm water, almost hot
3 1/2 - 4 cups sifted flour
1/2 tsp. salt
*honey or pinch of sugar*

Mix all the dry goods together, salt, flour.
Form a pile.
Make a well or dimple inside pile of flour, salt.

*Drop the yeast into the almost hot water along with a drop or two of honey or a pinch or two of sugar.

Stir once or twice.

When it starts to bubble and froth pour into the well of dry.
Knead till mixed.
Cover and rest, let rise in a warm place.
Once doubled knead again.
Rise.
Put it in your fridge overnight or even for a couple hours.
You will notice it still rising but it is dimpled.
This is the gluten working, it'll get really weird if you use whole grain wheat flour.
Will be sticky.

If you are feeling brave add dry spices such as oregano, basil, crushed red pepper to the dry stuff.
Or if you want a really chewy crust that is crazy thick for a deep dish, 1 cup hot water, 1/4 cup of red wine or beer instead of the 1 1/4 cup of just very warm water.

Pizzamaking.com is actually a great forum, people can unite under a common love.

Gratzi

BTW. Soccer moms do suck, they are dangerous drivers.
One t-boned my gfs mom, fucking biati whore was on her cell phone and driving a huge SUV. Ma was in a neck brace for months, sued the shit out of that putzina
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19604038


very nice

good job
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19661376
United States
07/13/2012 02:23 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
Nothing wrong with cheddar on pizza. OP must have never heard of Mexican pizza.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1550123


thats just a soggy flat taco

pizza is, well, oh nevermind

many soccer moms are hot though
Anonymous Coward
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07/13/2012 08:51 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
bump
Fucking hilarious!
tounge
Anonymous Coward
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07/13/2012 09:40 AM
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bumpbumpbump
Anonymous Coward
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07/13/2012 09:59 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
What it comes down to is American moms don't care anymore. if it was deep fried raccoon assholes slathered in garlic butter on a stick, they would serve it to their families. Y'all don't care what you put into your mouths anyway so why not just kill everyone in your families becuase you're too damn lazy to make a real effort at what should be the best time of the day? If you use the excuse you are busy, get your ass up earlier! Feed your kids BEFORE they go out the door. Give them lunch money or pack them something DECENT. When you get home, cook real food, not that hamburger Helper shit!
But no, you lazy bitch moms who THINK your fucked in the head lives are SOOOOOOOOOOOO important that you can't even be bothered to fuck your old men on a nightly basis, because let's face it,you're tired; deserve to have your lazy good for nothing asses kicked!
Maybe your family should go to Grandma's house after school and after dad gets home so that they can actually get a decent meal considering how yourself absorbed lazy cunts are sooooooooooo busy all day doing what? working, cleaning,nothing?
You bitches who think so highly of yourselves should be the ones who get divorced becuase your husbands are getting cheated.
There are real women out there who love to cook and can make ANYTHING from scratch you want, but they can't find a decent man to spoil and pamper because you fake lazy bitches snatch them up and then ruin it for the rest of us because they lose faith in good women out there altogether!

All I can say is men, you get what you fucking pay for.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
07/13/2012 10:11 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
I left NY for Arkansas over 20 years ago, haven't had a decent pizza since. My favorite was served at Four Brothers Inn, Mahopac, NY.

If I ever win the lotto, I'm flying everyone I know to that location for a slice of pie.

All other pizza is sub par.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9913239



I still like Pizzatown USA in Elmwood Park, NJ

Anonymous Coward
User ID: 11355555
United States
07/13/2012 11:00 AM
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Re: Soccer-Moms cannot cook worth shit! FUCK YOU! DO NOT USE YELLOW CHEESE ON PIZZA!!!!!!
YOU FUCKING CUNTS NEVER SHOULD USE CHEDDAR CHEESE ON PIZZA!

 Quoting: TheItalian 19561680


It really depends on what kind of pizza you're making. If you're doing something like a cheeseburger pizza then cheddar definitely belongs in the cheese blend that you use.

But seriously, there's a lot of shit in the world worth screaming about. What kind of cheese your bitches use on pizza probably shouldn't be one of them, but it does offer a fascinating insight into your priorities and how your mind works. Thank you OP.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19678165
United States
07/13/2012 02:25 PM
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