Why Don't People Say To Each Other Things That They Really Mean. | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1539112 United States 07/15/2012 04:20 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Like when I was in the 4th grade, I had a teacher who didn't like me very much. I was from the trailer park and I don't know if the had something to do with her dislike of me or not. I was very intelligent, but my social functioning was not very good. Quoting: FierySky She decided to get me by giving me a bad report at Conference Time. My dad and mother went, which was unusual because my dad didn't usually go. But, the teacher wouldn't let me come in and she told my dad, Who was a Verbally Abusive Animal, a whole bunch of stuff-basically she loaded him, cocked the weapon and pointed him at me and pulled the trigger. So, of course after the conference, he went off on my in the car and I remember crying and trying to explain, but he wouldn't hear it. He even drove around extra so he could scream at me longer. Mom, of course, kept silent in the front seat probably glad she wasn't the subject of the tirade. I was quite disassociative by the time I was in the 4th grade, so I was kind of crouched low in my body and not seeing a whole lot over the seat in front of me in my memories of the event. It was horrible. But, I went to school and I don't think I told her what had happened. I might have tried to tell her, but I no longer trusted her and I didn't believe that she had any compassion anyway. Why didn't I tell. She probably wouldn't have believed me, but none of them figured out that dad was a Rageaholic and that was at least part of the cause of my mental illness. So strange, don't you think. 1983 sucked and when the summer came, I became anorexic and bulemic. They never could figure it out and we weren't supposed to tell because SRS would take us away. So strange. P.S. If you post mean shit, I will ban you from the thread and delete your posts. I'm in no mood for that crap. Be nice. It sucks when you have a parent or parents who like to yell at you, but I wouldn't call it horrible. And a lot of teachers are pieces of crap who bait parents so they "get involved" rather than make it look like they don't pay attention to you in their class. Why are you still dwelling on this? |
FierySky (OP) User ID: 7612693 United States 07/15/2012 04:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | So, last night I was talking to Lord Yahweh about what happened, and I asked Lord Jesus to let her watch from my memories what happened because she set it in motion on purpose, let her enjoy the show. I thought she was in a nursing home type place right now. My mother said that she saw her. I bet mom remembers that event. It sucked. But, Lord Jesus had the woman brought in, so I guess she might have died. At first, the woman was like, "But that was so long ago." and Lord Jesus told her something about it still being important to me. She watched the film of it-Holy Spirit found the file in my brain. Then she argued some more, but I told her that she set it up and it was what she wanted. She finally admitted it. She say, "Ok, I admit it." Something was done, then and I don't know what that was. I didn't want anything from her other than an acknowledgement of what happened and the severity of putting a child before a ragaholic gorilla and winding up the gorilla and setting him loose on the child. So, I don't know all the details, but I guess maybe asking for things like that aren't a good idea. Still, I wanted her to know what had happened. Unfortunately, I'm having a hard time staying awake today now that it has happened. I just want to go to sleep. |
FierySky (OP) User ID: 7612693 United States 07/15/2012 04:27 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Like when I was in the 4th grade, I had a teacher who didn't like me very much. I was from the trailer park and I don't know if the had something to do with her dislike of me or not. I was very intelligent, but my social functioning was not very good. Quoting: FierySky She decided to get me by giving me a bad report at Conference Time. My dad and mother went, which was unusual because my dad didn't usually go. But, the teacher wouldn't let me come in and she told my dad, Who was a Verbally Abusive Animal, a whole bunch of stuff-basically she loaded him, cocked the weapon and pointed him at me and pulled the trigger. So, of course after the conference, he went off on my in the car and I remember crying and trying to explain, but he wouldn't hear it. He even drove around extra so he could scream at me longer. Mom, of course, kept silent in the front seat probably glad she wasn't the subject of the tirade. I was quite disassociative by the time I was in the 4th grade, so I was kind of crouched low in my body and not seeing a whole lot over the seat in front of me in my memories of the event. It was horrible. But, I went to school and I don't think I told her what had happened. I might have tried to tell her, but I no longer trusted her and I didn't believe that she had any compassion anyway. Why didn't I tell. She probably wouldn't have believed me, but none of them figured out that dad was a Rageaholic and that was at least part of the cause of my mental illness. So strange, don't you think. 1983 sucked and when the summer came, I became anorexic and bulemic. They never could figure it out and we weren't supposed to tell because SRS would take us away. So strange. P.S. If you post mean shit, I will ban you from the thread and delete your posts. I'm in no mood for that crap. Be nice. It sucks when you have a parent or parents who like to yell at you, but I wouldn't call it horrible. And a lot of teachers are pieces of crap who bait parents so they "get involved" rather than make it look like they don't pay attention to you in their class. Why are you still dwelling on this? You don't understand. He didn't just yell at us, he Raged. He screamed, he had spittle on his mouth, looked like he was going to reach out and smack the shit out of you. He never stopped until we were crying and begging for mercy. He was like an animal. He didn't quit until the rage attack ended. Happened from my earliest memories. I guess you just don't understand what I experienced. Have you ever seen your fathers face mere inches from yours with hate focused intensely in his eyes directed right at you. Lips curled and basically snarling. Try to imagine that. Last Edited by FierySky on 07/15/2012 04:31 PM |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 19097287 Mexico 07/15/2012 04:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1539112 United States 07/15/2012 04:34 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Like when I was in the 4th grade, I had a teacher who didn't like me very much. I was from the trailer park and I don't know if the had something to do with her dislike of me or not. I was very intelligent, but my social functioning was not very good. Quoting: FierySky She decided to get me by giving me a bad report at Conference Time. My dad and mother went, which was unusual because my dad didn't usually go. But, the teacher wouldn't let me come in and she told my dad, Who was a Verbally Abusive Animal, a whole bunch of stuff-basically she loaded him, cocked the weapon and pointed him at me and pulled the trigger. So, of course after the conference, he went off on my in the car and I remember crying and trying to explain, but he wouldn't hear it. He even drove around extra so he could scream at me longer. Mom, of course, kept silent in the front seat probably glad she wasn't the subject of the tirade. I was quite disassociative by the time I was in the 4th grade, so I was kind of crouched low in my body and not seeing a whole lot over the seat in front of me in my memories of the event. It was horrible. But, I went to school and I don't think I told her what had happened. I might have tried to tell her, but I no longer trusted her and I didn't believe that she had any compassion anyway. Why didn't I tell. She probably wouldn't have believed me, but none of them figured out that dad was a Rageaholic and that was at least part of the cause of my mental illness. So strange, don't you think. 1983 sucked and when the summer came, I became anorexic and bulemic. They never could figure it out and we weren't supposed to tell because SRS would take us away. So strange. P.S. If you post mean shit, I will ban you from the thread and delete your posts. I'm in no mood for that crap. Be nice. It sucks when you have a parent or parents who like to yell at you, but I wouldn't call it horrible. And a lot of teachers are pieces of crap who bait parents so they "get involved" rather than make it look like they don't pay attention to you in their class. Why are you still dwelling on this? You don't understand. He didn't just yell at us, he Raged. He screamed, he had spittle on his mouth, looked like he was going to reach out and smack the shit out of you. He never stopped until we were crying and begging for mercy. He was like an animal. He didn't quit until the rage attack ended. Happened from my earliest memories. I guess you just don't understand what I experienced. Have you ever seen your fathers face mere inches from yours with hate focused intensely in his eyes directed right at you. Try to imagine that. Actually, I have. And my mother as well, although the craziest I've seen her rage was in my adulthood, and that outburst was over something completely retarded. I don't have to imagine. The thing is, there has to come a point when you stop blaming events from the past or the people involved. You have to search inside yourself for your own answers. You can say it was this one event that changed a part of your life. Okay. I could say that any of the events that I had to witness at my own parents' hellacious marriage changed parts of my self. But when you work on your own issues, you have to step back and remember that there are reasons, albeit stupid ones sometimes, that our parents act the way they do. Maybe that's what they thought would be the best way to teach you. Maybe they didn't understand that at that age you could have listened without being yelled at. Regardless, parents are people too. And expecting perfection or for one instance to have changed the outcome of your life is a waste of your time and energy. |
FierySky (OP) User ID: 7612693 United States 07/15/2012 04:37 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 19735043 United Kingdom 07/15/2012 04:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Like when I was in the 4th grade, I had a teacher who didn't like me very much. I was from the trailer park and I don't know if the had something to do with her dislike of me or not. I was very intelligent, but my social functioning was not very good. Quoting: FierySky She decided to get me by giving me a bad report at Conference Time. My dad and mother went, which was unusual because my dad didn't usually go. But, the teacher wouldn't let me come in and she told my dad, Who was a Verbally Abusive Animal, a whole bunch of stuff-basically she loaded him, cocked the weapon and pointed him at me and pulled the trigger. So, of course after the conference, he went off on my in the car and I remember crying and trying to explain, but he wouldn't hear it. He even drove around extra so he could scream at me longer. Mom, of course, kept silent in the front seat probably glad she wasn't the subject of the tirade. I was quite disassociative by the time I was in the 4th grade, so I was kind of crouched low in my body and not seeing a whole lot over the seat in front of me in my memories of the event. It was horrible. But, I went to school and I don't think I told her what had happened. I might have tried to tell her, but I no longer trusted her and I didn't believe that she had any compassion anyway. Why didn't I tell. She probably wouldn't have believed me, but none of them figured out that dad was a Rageaholic and that was at least part of the cause of my mental illness. So strange, don't you think. 1983 sucked and when the summer came, I became anorexic and bulemic. They never could figure it out and we weren't supposed to tell because SRS would take us away. So strange. P.S. If you post mean shit, I will ban you from the thread and delete your posts. I'm in no mood for that crap. Be nice. It sucks when you have a parent or parents who like to yell at you, but I wouldn't call it horrible. And a lot of teachers are pieces of crap who bait parents so they "get involved" rather than make it look like they don't pay attention to you in their class. Why are you still dwelling on this? You don't understand. He didn't just yell at us, he Raged. He screamed, he had spittle on his mouth, looked like he was going to reach out and smack the shit out of you. He never stopped until we were crying and begging for mercy. He was like an animal. He didn't quit until the rage attack ended. Happened from my earliest memories. I guess you just don't understand what I experienced. Have you ever seen your fathers face mere inches from yours with hate focused intensely in his eyes directed right at you. Lips curled and basically snarling. Try to imagine that. Sounds a bit like my own abusive and thankfully estranged father who is a sociopath bordering on psychopath. The fact that he raged in the manner he did says a lot about him and his inadequacies, he would have taken whatever the teacher said about you as a sleight on his own parenting skills which sound like they were somewhat lacking as he has then gone and taken it out on you instead of discussing and working it out with you or even hearing your side of things. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 17407665 United States 07/15/2012 04:43 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1106916 United States 07/15/2012 04:47 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
FierySky (OP) User ID: 7612693 United States 07/15/2012 04:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I don't know why people are so mean OP. Quoting: Lisa*Lisa I do think that it comes from some kind of deep seeded self hated, insecurity or fear. Maybe. I have no idea what this teacher was told about me behind my back. The administrators had forced me into PSA for mentally unstable children when I wanted to change school. Of course, I didn't understand that I was a subject in a psychological experiment for "Open Classrooms" at the more upwardly mobile school I had been bussed to from kindergarten on. That's why they were so nasty to me when I tried to leave that school. I was part of the "poor kids" group they bussed in. Insanity, that. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1145382 United States 07/15/2012 05:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | OP, I'm sorry that you went through so much pain because of your father's rage. Have you had counseling about your childhood? It would probably help a lot. It sounds like you need to talk it out and find forgiveness for your father who sounds like he had/has a mental illness. As for that teacher, she probably didn't realize what she was doing. Or maybe she was just a bad teacher. The blame is more your dad's than the teachers, I would think. I had a third grade teacher who would turn red in the face and scream at kids so loud all the other teachers would close their classroom doors. All the kids were afraid of her. She probably wouldn't get by with that nowadays but I remember having anxiety for a whole year when she was my teacher. I also had a 2nd grade teacher who called me a little liar for repeating what some kids told me that there were spiders in the water fountain. I still remember that almost 50 years later. She was so hateful. Someone like that should not be allowed around children. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 19852490 United States 07/16/2012 01:18 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Because people are a bunch of timid pussies, cunt-bumping their egos one second than talking shit behind each others backs the next. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17407665 The quickest way to popularity is lying. The quickest way to solitude is brutal honesty. ahhh yes and the solitude is worth it's weight in gold in my opinion hence you get what you've paid for in same ; ) |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 19887358 United States 07/16/2012 04:49 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 6877072 United States 07/16/2012 06:18 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 6877072 United States 07/16/2012 06:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Because people are a bunch of timid pussies, cunt-bumping their egos one second than talking shit behind each others backs the next. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17407665 The quickest way to popularity is lying. The quickest way to solitude is brutal honesty. ahhh yes and the solitude is worth it's weight in gold in my opinion hence you get what you've paid for in same ; ) Ugh the c word and the p word... |