X Marks the Spot

No, nothing close to rage. Frustration. Sometimes he tells me things and won't elaborate on them. I told him if he won't elaborate on them, then don't tell me. I told him my imagination gets the best of me when he brings up higher Masons being interested in me, MAJI, and other stuff. Last night I asked him why he brought up MAJI in reference to me the other day if they are of no concern to me.

It is like he knows about people watching me (and interested in me), but is not allowed to discuss it with me. That shit is frustrating, to know he has someone/s out there that 'watch' me, and he is in direct contact with. And yet, even though it seems all about me, he can't tell me anything. I'm like, WTF?

Then, people calling me 'genius' all the time gets old. I don't want to here it. My wife even does it now. My friend is a true genius, and he looks at me like he was the simpleton. He says 'they' look at me as an enigma. Who is 'they'? Why do they look at me as an enigma? I'm a straight forward fucking person that doesn't knowingly lie about things, and have been pretty open through all of this...whatever this is. Then he hinted that 'they' think ET is involved in how I think the way I do.

It just goes on and on with other stuff as well, and I tend to have minor breakdowns that I don't discuss with anyone, not even my wife. This time, unfortunately, it occurred just before getting to my buddy's house for dinner.

SEER777 I want the flame dress lol.

It happened in front of some friends. As soon as I walked in the door, one of them said, "Damn, you look stressed." It went downhill from there.

I experienced some pretty stout anxiety last night as well.

Man 'kills' what they Fear.

Fear is contagious.


And 'Group Think' under the spell of fear, is one of the more dangerous things of all...


Burn people alive...if you will.

And believe themSelves justified.


Why?



Because their 'friends' were doing it...

I probably would have been burned alive. Or had my skin flayed from my body, using clam shells...

I don't think I will be posting that image again for awhile.

Not after the limo burning.

...

wow just felt a surge on my body ending on my arm wound

I took a piss on it yesterday, btw.

Fucking HATE anxiety.

You peed on your arm?

I don't follow.

The Crossing of the Return Threshold

The trick in returning is to retain the wisdom gained on the quest, to integrate that wisdom into a human life, and then maybe figure out how to share the wisdom with the rest of the world.

wow just felt a surge on my body ending on my arm wound

I took a piss on it yesterday, btw.

Ugh...the images and story of the 'limo fire' is making me dizzy. It caused much of silence yesterday morning.

All I see is the synch...


Last Saturday on the way down to Market, I passed a limo going in the opposite direction. North on I-5.

I thought to myself, how rather new and shiny it looked, and how those who would hire such a service, would most likely demand quality.

I then thought to myself, what do they do with all the old models? Do they resell them? Would an old limo be worth anything to begin with due it nature?

Are they crushed into cubes due their now inherent worthlessness?

I thought about this for sometime 2 Saturdays ago.


This has also been a 'theme'...







I have also begun to notice that which I place in the ('') forms sentences.

wow just felt a surge on my body ending on my arm wound

I took a piss on it yesterday, btw.

You peed on your arm?

It is also known and used in India for a long period of time by yogis,and even as a holy ritual-drinking of one glass of your own urine every morning.

I figured it would sound weird.

Advice came from my sister which benefitted (is that a word?) from urinotherapy several months ago, with both internal and external use. Apparently it is good for the cicatrization.

Funny thing is I had become interested in it a few days before receiving that wound. And I even tried a cup of my own on a morning! Yes, I did it.