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Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19797477
Japan
07/23/2012 05:58 PM
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Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Pretty much all mothers are fiercely devoted to their kids (unless they are psychotic). But you see a much bigger range with fathers. Some seem just as devoted as mothers. Others are cold and distant, or abandon their kids.

I'm having trouble understanding this big range of differences.

Maybe deep down inside fathers can't be as devoted as mothers and the ones who seem to love their kids so much are just putting on an act?
Charlie Scene

User ID: 15739868
United States
07/23/2012 06:02 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Pretty much all mothers are fiercely devoted to their kids (unless they are psychotic). But you see a much bigger range with fathers. Some seem just as devoted as mothers. Others are cold and distant, or abandon their kids.

I'm having trouble understanding this big range of differences.

Maybe deep down inside fathers can't be as devoted as mothers and the ones who seem to love their kids so much are just putting on an act?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19797477


I think the only way a father is not devoted to their children first, is if they are narcissistic. A narcissistic person puts themselves above EVERYONE else.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19996307
United States
07/23/2012 06:22 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
I have seen during my lifetime that if a father falls out of love for his wife, he also falls out of love for his children. Or to put it another way, if a father does not love his wife he also does not love his children.
Charlie Scene

User ID: 15739868
United States
07/23/2012 06:33 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
I have seen during my lifetime that if a father falls out of love for his wife, he also falls out of love for his children. Or to put it another way, if a father does not love his wife he also does not love his children.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19996307


I heard a quote once, don't remember by who, it said "The greatest thing a father can do for his children, is to love their mother."
SOFA-KING-COOL

User ID: 4812140
United States
07/23/2012 06:36 PM

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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
first off, hardly ANY moms are fiercley devoted to thier children, not on this planet anyways.


second, i think the diff is pretty obvious. white fathers will do anything for thier kids, always putting them before themselves.

black parents are pretty indifferent toward thier kids, and ALWAYS put themselves and thier wants before thier kids.

Last Edited by EVIL_BEAN_KID on 07/23/2012 06:37 PM
SLAM THAT CLAM
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19996307
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07/23/2012 06:52 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
To 481240; No I think you are wrong. This phenomena I have observed applies equally to all races and religions. I know this because my father was white and all of his kids. When he left my mother and even before he did that, he was not giving any of his children much love or affection. After he left my mother he did not care about any of his kids. After he remarried though he did love the kids of his new wife.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 20326588
United States
07/23/2012 06:59 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Yes it is all Dad's fault that mom kicked him out.
womanoftheworld

User ID: 14901910
Canada
07/23/2012 07:03 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
first off, hardly ANY moms are fiercley devoted to thier children, not on this planet anyways.


second, i think the diff is pretty obvious. white fathers will do anything for thier kids, always putting them before themselves.

black parents are pretty indifferent toward thier kids, and ALWAYS put themselves and thier wants before thier kids.
 Quoting: SOFA-KING-COOL


This comment is one of the most ignorant things I've ever heard!I believe a man's parenting as a child affects his ability to attach and truly love. Shitty parents beget shitty parents. Narcissism definitely prevents a man from real love, he will dote on and show off his children until they are old enough to figure him out, then he will turn on them. Truth!
loveslife
Haelo

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07/23/2012 07:16 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Mothers can be like that too, its not just fiercly devoted or psychotic with them either. And the differences can be explained by different personalities or the way they were brought up.
I am not a anonymous coward.
Haelo

User ID: 20381588
United States
07/23/2012 07:18 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
I have seen during my lifetime that if a father falls out of love for his wife, he also falls out of love for his children. Or to put it another way, if a father does not love his wife he also does not love his children.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19996307


I dont think necessarily. Wife could be a bitch but that doesnt have to mean he wouldnt love his kids.
I am not a anonymous coward.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13926736
United States
07/23/2012 07:34 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
There are sperm donors and there are fathers. It all boils down to self centered behavior, if the individual male or female is self-centered they will only think about themselves and not put themselves out for spouse or children.

Many women choose the "bad boy" because it's exciting. But they don't think about any long-term consequences. Getting pregnant,

Lastly, in some cases it is a direct result of their ex, mine was hell on wheels and I seriously considered abandoning my kids to avoid the psychological trauma.

Fortunately my inner strength, friends and family help guide me through this process. My children are now productive members of society, college educated with a good job. In retrospect, I'm glad I made the decision I did, because today I have wonderful relationship with my children.

From a Dad
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 17938575
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07/23/2012 07:49 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Some people are assholes.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22307582
United States
08/20/2012 04:47 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Men love women and women love kids. For me to love my kids a lot, I've got to love my woman, and the kids because of her.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22161671
United States
08/20/2012 04:51 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Pretty much all mothers are fiercely devoted to their kids (unless they are psychotic). But you see a much bigger range with fathers. Some seem just as devoted as mothers. Others are cold and distant, or abandon their kids.

I'm having trouble understanding this big range of differences.

Maybe deep down inside fathers can't be as devoted as mothers and the ones who seem to love their kids so much are just putting on an act?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19797477


Still others secretly plot against them

these are the worst

Because the kid usually doesn't find out until later on in life...

after trouble with the "law" due to a false arrest...or trouble at places of work due to being laid off or fired...

bad things seem to follow them...

then, they realize ...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27297141
11/08/2012 10:22 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
bump
Enim1

User ID: 1089842
United States
11/08/2012 10:36 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
People are just People. Some do good while others are evil. There is that "mean" in between where most people fall.
Lead by example
peace
Enim1
chauchat

User ID: 10858311
United States
11/08/2012 10:38 PM

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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
bump
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27297141


[link to thenewviewonsex.blogspot.com] The brainwashing to be promiscuous works better on some than others.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1170214
United States
11/08/2012 10:47 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
It's the female that makes the difference, the female is the glue that holds the family unit together, it's only a mystery in America,
there are exceptions but this is the rule and has been understood thru out all ages
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22956557
United States
11/08/2012 11:02 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
I love my wife and my children beyond comprehension.

But if my wife were to violate my trust, the rage would over ride everything I would think. If the state wouldn't grant me at least 50% custody I would cut her off entirely and put her and the kids under a bridge. It's a matter of principle. The state is usually wrong in their divorce decisions. My wife knows full well that I would never accept an unfair judgement. So she would never try to use the state to get over on me or punish me. It would only hurt her and the kids. If she were to play fair then they would have all my support. All the money they need.

But if it were unfair then I won't help at all and I would die in a gun fight before I went to jail for the bullshit. The kids would eventually learn that their mother was the piece of shit. I would never do anything to harm my family. No flirting or any of that stupid crap.

Remember, principles are more important than a human life.
chauchat

User ID: 10858311
United States
11/08/2012 11:15 PM

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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
It's the female that makes the difference, the female is the glue that holds the family unit together, it's only a mystery in America,
there are exceptions but this is the rule and has been understood thru out all ages
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1170214

As in putting up with anything like the suffering madonna?
Because virtue comes more naturally to females? I see no evidence for this, but do see a lot of propaganda arguing this. Is it because the Jimmy Saviles and the Sanduskys of the world just love those single-parent families headed up by a gullible woman, and all those "widow's sons"?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 2844906
United States
11/08/2012 11:35 PM
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Re: Some fathers seem like they would do would do anything for their kids. Others abandon them. Why such a big difference?
Disregard the racism and sexism, none of that even adds anything to the discussion. Instead look at human behavior of both sexes and apply it to fatherhood/motherhood.

I have read about how men tend towards extremes more than women, which could explain this. In other words, biologically men are more likely to be extremely gifted geniuses or artist or athletes etc. than women are, but also more likely to be serial killers or rapists and other evil things. Women tend to fall in the middle of the behavior and performance measurements, although there are certainly exceptions.

Therefore, I would propose that men are less reliable than women in terms of caring for a child in general, but much more capable of providing a comfortable life through career achievement or making a kids life a living hell through neglect or abuse. Thoughts GLP?

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