What was the best or most memorable thing your child has said to you?

my son once said obama sucks. I dropped an ice cold beer on the carpet.

What was your reply to that??

My Daugther came home one day to tell me, she didn't want to go back to school because it was too hard. I told her something's in life are hard and she cut me to say, " it's not that mom, my teacher keep teaching stuff I don't know"

Man did I laugh, and still do

Oxx

sorry pop. i didn't mean it.

Yes you did you ungrateful fucking ingrate

"When I get big and you get little, can I tell you what to do?"

Of course, now get in the car.

and from my grandson:

"I know what you need Grandma, a MAGNET FLYING GLASS!"

What a dumb thread to post on GLP.

...We lost power one night and my son said.." I can't see my eyes"...

My friends sister had twins, a boy and a girl. She used to give them baths together. Just as she was thinking it was time to start giving them separate baths her son asks "Mommy, why does Shelly have 2 butts?"

I think she missed her window.

We were in the supermarket shopping for groceries and my daughter saw this goth girl and immediately ran behind me and said "mum that girl looks like Ursula". I replied "who" and she said "the evil sea witch from the little mermaid". I fell on the floor laughing, as did 'Ursula's' friend... Classic

My son told someone to "Shut the fuck up asshole pile of shit cocksucker" and I started laughing. I told him good job and brought him out for ice cream. I told him " Son, Im proud of you, you tell it like it is without any political correctness" Great kid.

My son told me he was gay. I beat the shit out of him and threw him in the basement for a week. I told him "When your done eating dick then you can come out. I would lay a beating on him every night.....I was also bored but he enjoyed every minute of it and he's now strait. So I guess you could say "I beat him strait"

My smart-ass teen daughter asked me once "Mom, would you wear shoes if you didn't have any feet?" I answered "of course not." She then looks at my chest and says, "why do you wear a bra?"

She and her sister thought it was hysterical.

musta deserved it, prick. tough luck.

At six..." can I take piano lessons?"

Not really funny ha-ha, but memorable...

I had a disabled son who passed away a couple of years ago. Back in the early 80's he used to ride the bus to school. One day when I picked him up at the bus stop I saw that he had been crying. I asked him what was wrong. He said..."Mom, I know what's wrong with me...God just didn't make me right."

I was speechless, but held back the tears...eventually I said that God had made him just right.....

May the angels and father bless your child


damn now im crying

Did i also deserve being miled by the chld and mother both knowing i was not the father and oly kept me strung along in order to co tinue recieving chd support in excess of a thousand and other bills paid

did i so deserve to be constanly put down and belittled all the whe supporting them

did i desrve to find put she was fucking her dad and she knew it was his kid

you do t know anything about me prick

I love you son !

I've never had a good experience with kids. They're dumb as shit.

My youngest son told me once when I was upset, "Don't worry mama, don't be upset. I will take care of you." He is so sweet.

My point exactly. That kid's a moron. There's no way he could take care of you. He's a fucking child.

First time my 2yr old encountered a black person while we were waiting in line to pay for something at the the pharmacy, my son asked me, Mommy, why is that person brown.

The "brown" person replied to my son, why are you "white".

His response was, I'm not white, I'm peach.

We both laughed at the child's innocence.

With her fingers upon her wrist, she exclaims, "I can feel my lungs". Never forgotten, always stirs a smile!

Daughter was 3 and a half. We'd just gotten a new dog and were talking about what to name her. Our daughter suggested a name I liked, and I said to here "What made you think of that one." Her answer:

"My brain told me"

My son when he was maybe two:

"Yo Ho Ho and a bottle of milk."

r u my uncle daddy

On Christmas day, when my daughter was 4...I heard her say "I love you mommy" through the kitchen window.

She is autistic, and they told me she would never say it. It took 4 years, but she did it.

Thank you for your kindness. Bless you...