I'm engaged and he found out I had threesomes. What do I do now?

...no-one wants the mother of their children to be a former bang-bus cum slut...

whore

Then you'll have a very hard time finding a female who hasn't indulged in this stuff. I have to disagree with you.

All I would look for in a women is honesty. If there is not total trust in your partner then what is the point of the relationship? When a person goes into a relationship and then marriage is considered then it is time to lay everything out on the table.

If a women tells me something that is bad and I know she did not have to tell me because I would have never found out about it then I am convinced she did it because she does really love me and does not want to hurt me in any way.

That shows me that no matter what she did she was being honest and has a good heart and I can trust this women with my back. I can totaly respect a person like that. This person is a "keeper".

.

Maybe she told you before you read it on the toilet wall in your local bar, or before you see pictures of it on some degrading porn website...

divorce lawyers love people like you

true that

OP watch Chasing Amy, make your fiancé watch it with you. It's an awesome movie, in fact the every movie Kevin Smith makes is pretty awesome from "Clerks" to "Clerks 2" to "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back." But "Chasing Amy" is the best it's his master piece, even better than "Zach and Miri make a porno"



I love that movie!

Well said. Plenty of people on here all too willing to cast that first stone.

To a certain extent I would agree.

However, our current state of who we are is largely determined by our past.

People can always change who they are going forward, but their past defines who they were up to the present.

its a pity people cant just be honest and answer the question. Some questions are hard to answer honestly, but its kind of selfish, when planning to get married.

OP.... Be sure (if you guys stay together) you WILL find something out about him, at some point, that you dont like.


The road is bumpy.

Don't do it! Your past is your past and if you are serious about this guy, you will keep it strictly monogamous and no 3somes. It never turns out well in the end when you add other people into your relationship. Now if you aren't too serious...have at it...but don't expect the relationship to last for the long haul

I agree. For guys it's a huge turn on, rather addictive in it's own way. Why not? You enjoyed it, why shouldn't he have the chance to experience the same?

it helps if the other girl enjoys women as well.

Sure, god will fix it

fucking bibletard

Spot on

First off im not religious, but things like this that make me believe that if we all followed the holy books teachings situations like this would never arise!

In my eyes you should consider the possibilities of your actions at everypoint in life, especially when it could affect your future!

Your a slut, not was but are. Some guys don't care but I woukd have left you at the party and threw your shit in the street.

exactly

as a woman i agree with this sentiment. if i found out the same thing about a man, i would not want to be with him. if he realized he was wrong and was repentant of his immoral actions, then "maybe," but who wants to be with a self-esteem lacking whore either male or female? no manboy whores for me, i want a real decent, moral man....and i kinda think his suggestion to you to have a threesome with a woman is to get back at you and then dump your whoring ass afterwards. he has lost all respect for you and that is deserved. he wants to see exactly how little self-respect you have....and just think you would also be corrupting another soul into immorality by engaging in this kind of whoring behavior. trampy slut.

every person should disclose their personal sexual history, etc. with someone they are seriously involved with / going to marry!!! good G-d people this is the person whom you should be able to trust most (beside your parents)!!!! i cannot believe i read on here how women should not disclose their sexual histories....that's totally dishonest and ridiculous and not the way to have a real honest intimate committed and REAL relationship. you women are posers and make me ashamed of women to read that shit. same goes for men.

women keep your legs crossed and men keep your dicks in your pants as appropriate!!!

exactly.

So you're a little bit older and a lot less bolder
Than you used to be.
So you used to shake 'em down,
But now you stop and think about your dignity.
So now sweet sixteen's turned thirty-one,
You get to feelin' weary when the work days done.
Well all you got to do is get up and into your kicks.
If you're in a fix.
Come back baby,
Rock and roll never forgets.

One in the pink and one in the stink?

Hey you can't un-ring a bell...maybe politely back off and give him some space/time to think things threw.

My experience in the past with these confessional-like faux pas' is that they tend to poison the well, things will never be the same between you again, it's paradise lost.

I hope it works out better for you.

I am not going to guide other people in their sex lives, however this is what I think otherwise.

No matter married or not, EVERYONE has a past and secrets that they will not want to share with their partners. Who say otherwise are full of shit or just want it to work one way, so that they know everything but keep their secrets whenever needed.

If you want a working relationship, respect the privacy and individual life of your partner and do NOT force her to reveal things which she does not want to share.

The fact that your boyfriend wants to "have a threesome" after just claiming it was humiliating for him for you to have experienced it is quite ridiculous. Either he approves them or not, and for men, actions speaks louder than words.

It is obvious he is ok with the idea of threesomes and either he is a selfish jerk or a manipulative sociopath who just tries to force you to do his bidding with any information he gets.

If you do not feel comfortable having a threesome with him, just say "No way. It was a past mistake and will not happen again." and that's it. If he cannot accept it, he does not respect you as he is willing to blackmail you with a personal and sensitive information and situation that you went through (be it fun or not, does not matter). If he leaves you because of not having a threesome, he is NOT worth it and not the kind of man you obviously assume him to be.

Even if you are ok with the idea of having a threesome, it is not a good idea to go with it before you can be sure what is the state of your relationship and whether he just wants to abuse you after finding out you did not live as holy as he expects.

I haven't ever asked my partners about their previous relationships, especially sex life unless they have told me themselves voluntary. I don't need to know what they did or did not with their exes, as only OUR sex life is what matters. I try to love the person who she is and not what she was, and hope to grow together so that I can say the same the next year too.

I remember a few cases my another half has asked about my sex experiences and I have mostly told I don't feel comfortable sharing it, and it hasn't be a problem for what I know. After all, there is/was always someone else than me involved too, so it would break the trust between me and my exes too, for it is not right to tell personal things about them to other people - even your own current gf/bf.

OP, you don't have to have a sex tape hidden in the attic perchance???

You kept a secret, got found out, he reacted normally.

I bet OP is 220lbs+

this OP is from 2012.

I wonder how it turned out????

There is one some place you can bet on that