My husband just left me and our son...don't know what to do next

^^ That is a definite possibility!

OP, if you guys have a checking/savings account, draw out the money before he does!! You do not want to be sitting there and totally broke because he took every cent.


As for him not paying child support, lol that's not how it works. When you go to court for a divorce usually child support and visitations are part of the proceedings.


Hope things get better for you, just be there for your child and keep your head up is all you can do right now.

Also his behavior (abusiveness) is escalating, if he does come back, keep a watch out for this.

HE WAS FROM KANSAS!!!
I actually dated a guy from New Jersey (where I attended university for a time) and SWORE I would NEVER date a yuppie/nerd again. I just didn't take into consideration that the package is just that...the wrapping.

youre not getting any younger, so skip the prelims... go right for the prostitution and heavy drug abuse

wishing the best for you and your family.....all I have to offer , sorry

Thanks for the advice...though we only have $15 in the account currently. We've been living paycheck-to-paycheck for two years now.
Thank you all so much for the advice! You are wonderful people and I am so glad I found this forum!

Maybe you are both just living above your means if finances are an issue, and you can't be a student/mom at the same time. Both are expensive endeavors both time and money wise.


Let's put it this way: what's left after all the NEEDS (not wants) are paid for? percentage wise

Men who walk out on their wife and kid(s) are pussies. Men who also don't appreciate a stay at home wife that raises their kid(s) are also pussies.

I don't have any advice for you but if he walks out on you and stays gone and leaves to fend for yourself then you are better off without his sorry ass.

Hi OP you sound like a nice enough woman, and I normally dont respond to these type of threads but I'll make an exception, simply because your where mature enough to state you are not blameless, which is rare. You dont appear to be playing the victim for self vindication.

OK, here is my take.

Your hubby, as a child used to throw temper tantrums.

As a result, the parenting applied was one of punishment to those temper tantrums, instead of parenting based on emotional guidance.

Now, as he does not have an authoritarian punishment reaction to his tempers, he now has free reign to act out.

It is a classic dummy spit and flounce.

Now. When he comes back (note this is when not if) make sure he is not coming back because he finds it "too tough" to "live without you", and he "is sorry". (how many times have you heard that?) If he displays that reasoning you are dealing with a manchild.

How do I know?

I was one. It was only with brutal self evaluation that I overcame that crap, and now never lose my shit in that way.

I now am able to stand my ground and communicate in a way to achieve a resolution, and in a calm manner. The only way I was able to do that is with humility, and recognising what is important, and what had been imprinted on my emotional growth.

You will also need to make some tough choices here too.

Hope that helps.

hey,i give you a hug.
my wife was caught with her boyfriend back in 07
i still have never seen my children since,two girls.
men are mean,he is not in love it sounds like. stay sober and be ok with yourself.jr needs you.the ass holes out here are not to be worried about.do what you need to do.babysitter even if needed and you work even if part time, try day care out and there is no need to replace the guy,stay single for a while till you get over him,dont bring another lozer in to your home,dont become stuck either
and remember love will guide u.
it will not be easy but you can be ok.
your brother dana

You just said money was missing which should have gone towards some bills?

Guess where it went?
Cash withdrawals(leave no paper trails) then off to either

A. Strip clubs & escorts
or
B. The other woman

He sounds like a real pussy. Anybody who treats a woman this way, especially the mother of his child, is a pussy. It sounds like you would be better off without him. And yes, he WILL pay child support. Him not giving a shit about you does not get him off the hook for supporting the kid he fathered. You have been a stay at home wife for two years? If so, depending on the state, you may also be entitled to alimony.

Let him go. You don't need that shit in your life and your child certainly doesn't.

Breakdown per month: Income: around $2k
Mandatory enrollment for healthcare: $400
Car payment (1 car): $360
Rent: $725
Electric/Water/Trash: +/- $200
Food: $100 a week (includes the diapers we are hoping will end soon)
Gas for car:$80 per week.

We get around $5k from student loans/grants/scholarships but they won't be disbursed until Sept. 22. Cjust started school this past May and sometime in October he will get what his tuition cost reimbursed (not books). We take online courses for some of it and need internet so that's about $75.

Hang in there. You don't want him back if that's how he reacted when he found out you were pregnant and if he throws things at you.

Plenty of classier men in the world.

Also, he's a banister.

Meant to say "bankster."

Damn iPad.

Not to make a joke, but you could hide yourself and your kid, but then again if you hide yourself when he really needs you, could back-fire..

so just chill and maybe give him some affection where he needs it most to make him chill

That was a nice post Apollo.

LMAO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT IS THAT VIDEO !

Bad advice, he did not cheat on her, he walked out to cool off, obviously.

Just cause there's many men out there, doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to stay and work it out, cause there's a good chance they can make it work, it's just money for god's sake, not the end of the world.

Move to the country, buy heirloom seeds, non-gmo, start your ranch/farm.

Many things that can help in this designed-to-make-us-fail system, leaving your man when he's hurting the most, is not the answer.

I agree; other than a few things he's posted that I disagree with, I've always found A.I. a really upstanding guy.

Breakdown per month: Income: around $2k
Mandatory enrollment for healthcare: $400
Car payment (1 car): $360
Rent: $725
Electric/Water/Trash: +/- $200
Food: $100 a week (includes the diapers we are hoping will end soon)
Gas for car:$80 per week.



Those car payments are redonculous, my latest car cost me 400+100 for parts (clunk out the repairs myself)


Seriously almost a quarter of your income for a car when you're BOTH students and only one works.


You need part part time work, he needs to take kids on weekend or something and you need to bust a nut.

Dear B-

I am so sorry to hear this.

May I ask you something?

Why didn't you go to the funeral with your husband?

Did you go and I just missed it?

If you didn't go this is not good.

Prayers are flying down to you tonight, sis.

Miggy

He is already displaying abusive behavior and she is suppose to stay by his side because he needs her? WTH are you smoking?

they got us figured out...

That's where I am at:
Do I leave while he's left me? He left me without the baby seat (he refused to leave it so that my parents could pick us up tomorrow) and now my son and I are kind of stuck at hom.
Do I stay and ignore everything that has happened? We've tried to work it out but he always backs down when it's his turn to concede. He's made really bad financial decisions that have left us with no money, $15 in total right now, and I've had his back, didn't say a word to protest though I knew they were bad ideas, and this is what he does when I do decide to stand up to him.

He will come back if he knows what's good for him. No worries

"...and started harping on him all of the time..."

Guys love this. Keep it up when he comes home, OP.

slap him

tell him you dont care about the money problems as many times as it takes over and over and over and over get it

stay together

Get rid of that car, and get a cheaper one. That car payment is eating up too much of your income. If your income is only $2,000 a month, you should be eligible for a state medical program, where your premiums are based on your income. My youngest is on the state program, and I pay $22 a month for her insurance. You need to apply for food stamps. All of your living expenses would count, but not that car payment. Are you getting WIC for your son? I think you might be income eligible, check with the local WIC office. You could get vouchers for milk, cheese, cereal, juice,eggs, etc. Every little bit helps.
DO NOT QUIT SCHOOL,no matter how tough it gets. You need the education to support your son.You only have to hang on until May when you graduate, then it will be easier for you.

you deserve better treatment, end of story.








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