Hi op, I do indeed understand how you feel. I turn 64 in a few weeks and I see a very big shift in direction in present times. I have experienced some really hard times in my own life raising 6 kids with very little money. I have had my electricty cut off several times, my car and tv re-possesed. I remember my wife and I trying to cook the family dinner on a grate in the livingroom as we had no electricty to power the cooker. But I have always tried to put a positive spin on things. I used to sit with the kids and play the guitar and we would make up songs. Despite all the adversary,we came through it stronger and more unified as a family. The journey through life is not an easy one but its a learning experience and it is vital to remain positive. I know how bad things are but the darkest hour is just before the dawn. I survived and now I have a loving family who mean the world to me.I have chronic spinal arthritis and two arthritic hips but do you know I walk five miles every day in spite of the pain. So no matter how bad things seem do not despair there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. I wish you well my friend and hope you remain positive.