What does this mean: My husband's Twitter Account is followed by 6 dating sites

Drop kick to the curb

NO one should be subjected to the filth he is courting. Ick Ick Eeewwwww

The fact that he thinks such behavior (carousing, drinking, porn, loosed women)is alright and to be pursued speaks volumes about his lack of character. And if you are a real person and not some roleplaying troll, then WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? For better for worse does not include betrayal and fornication.

what if you have no one else in your family except him....

Then make preparations to go it alone and avoid sexual contact with him in the mean time to prevent stds?

Right after you join Twitter, I guarantee about 3 random 'fake' bot accounts will be Following you.

These are bogus accounts, and they follow you on and off randomly.

no, I wish I were a troll, but I could post his twitter link here for real,

I couldn't make those names up if I wanted to...of those women he follows...

both my parents are dead, and I have no family besides him

he didnt want to have children, so I have a couple of cats

just me

if I stop and think about going it alone, I feel devastated

I always thought that if I sacrificed, thought of my husband as my friend, was willing to relocate, do whatever it took to help him get ahead, things would work out

it worked out for my parents....

the other day, I was trying to reach him for hours. He wouldn't tell me when he was coming back, what our plans were, whether he would be home back even for a late 10 pm dinner

I called his cell, texted him...didnt hear from him until after 11 pm

he told me he saw my messages, ones where I was pleading with him to not do this to us, and he chose to ignore them

I cannot relate to that. I don't think I have done that to anyone in my life, definitely not someone I cared about

end rant...sorry guys, and thank you for the food for thought

honestly, I had not even thought of STD's until you mentioned it

Alot of those sites are just spam ads too. I go on a movie channel and I am forever getting fuckbuddy messages. Big business these days...

OP, he might be depressed. Loss of job, noticeably angry,
etc. Do not insult him in case it is depression.

Everything you're saying OP is making my stomach hurt.
This guy, looks to have some bad intentions. Dating sites following him are one thing that could probably be brushed off, but him following these girls and above all, treating you the way he is... serious red flags for something being
fucked.

I agree with the AC who said he's feeling guilt. He feels guilty and every time you're nice and sweet to him it fuels the guilt. Rather than just fixing his issues he's going to push you away and continue to make himself feel like a real man by messing around.

I hate to say it as well, but you need to leave him. You would be happier in time without the weight of all the worry he's putting on you.

You don't deserve to be treated this way. At all. No amount of love can make a person do anything if they don't want to. If he doesn't want to be the man you thought he was anymore, then don't try to make him. Let him go.
I know that is way easier to say than do, but you will find out, if you do this, that you're way better off without a guy like him.

I spent 6 years with a guy who I thought loved me. I knew he was doing things behind my back, but I found ways to tell myself it wasn't as serious as I thought. In the back of my mind I knew better. Everyone told me. I thought if I treated him well, he would appreciate me and realize he had a good girl who would do anything to make him happy.
The only way I made him realize that was by leaving him. He still to this day will text me saying he is sorry. I have not spoken to him in 2 years. I moved on and am very happy with a wonderful guy who treats me well and who I trust.

Seriously, OP... take care of YOURSELF. Don't put his feelings above yours anymore. You have every right to be taken care of and should not have to spend your time pleading for his attention. Once you finally stop and focus on yourself, he'll miss you. He's going to be a lonely guy and that's his fault.

Last Edited by Kick on 10/01/2012 01:27 AM

I feel he may have fallen out of your marriage.

My husband of 25+ years doesn't require a night out.
He doesn't require a twitter account.
We both have the same facebook friends too, people we both know.
I don't require a night out with the gals either.

My husband and I both still care about each other that we are still close friends, if either of us were invited to go out somewhere without taking the other one we wouldn't go at all, I mean why leave you very best friend at home to go out?

Women and men get married when they are not best friends first or don't bond to being close friends during the dating process,and your scenario is always how it ends.

You may have been part of the cause of not being close friends with your beau.
I go camping, fishing & hiking with mine.
I don't go on shop-a-thons at the malls spending his money when he is at work. It's not something a friend would do.

Maybe you should have a good sit down talk with him and find out why your not the necessary friend you want to be ever before you begin asking him what is wring with your marriage.

Solve the friendship first.
If he isn't interested in a close friendship, going and doing things together like friends would normally do then chances are strong he has found another friend he wants to be with more than you.

Goodluck.

Friends don't let friends be alone and if friends can't go out then a true friend will stay by their side 24/7.

well there's the irony

I dated men I thought were more attractive sexually, probably better job prospects, but I married this one because I thought we were friends

I thought if you were friends first and foremost, then the other stuff would fall into place

I didn't marry the sexy rich stud...I married (I thought) the nice dependable guy who I could talk to

But now, just as my mom is gone (last year) and I have no one to fall back on, now it's like a Mr Jekyll switch

He went away to New York City for work (which I found him) for some months, and while he was there, it's as if he got in touch with his inner dick

It's as if he is enjoying hurting me

Someone said he might be depressed, and I understand that, and have tried to be careful about his feelings

However, where is the give and take? Even depressed people shake it off, and realize they must be there for the ones they love (I was very depressed after my father died, as he was my friend, so I know what that is like)

Thank you again for your insight people

much appreciated...and it helps to know I am not alone

I've been hesitant to talk to anyone we know about this, because I didn't want to soil his name with people we both know, and then it gets weird if you end up working it out...so I have had no one to talk to about it

I'm truly sorry, OP.

Your husband sounds like a deeply hurt individual. He's feeling guilty, it's obvious, but he's not willing to accept that..
There's nothing for you to do but put your foot down. You can't fix someone else unless the other person is willing to let you in..

Many twitter users are fake; they follow users as a form of spam. Every twitter account eventually gets spam followers, often porn or dating related.

I happen to agree with this as well.

OP hes just stressed out hes not bringing home any bread etc...and anyone can follow him on twitter....it happens, give him a break and stop being critical of him

No, don't post his twitter account name on here.. it might be violation of GLP TOS and anyways, you don't want a bunch of crazy glp tards fucking with your husband while you're trying to figure out what is going on and what to do about it..

Anyways, that's a really shitty if everything you are saying is accurate. =/

It wouldn't be easy to leave him. Not just the logistics of it but also your feelings are going to be hurt for a while and the fear of uncertainty re: your future without a support-net makes it even worse.. sucks man.

One good thing you have going for you is it isn't a physically abusive relationship so you can take a little time to verify your suspicions, then plan and brace for the separation.

If I could throw in some advice..

Even if you don't believe in "karma", stay in the right and don't get mixed up with any other guys before you separate from him. While it might be tempting to turn to another man for the possible support of moving out and the attention/validation/companionship/intimacy that you are lacking now - it won't be worth it in the long run.

And I'm serious about the STD's if you don't want to ruin any chance of having a normal romantic life later on when better days are here for you.

Either way, I hope everything works out for you, that he will get better and that this current situation only appears to be worse than it really is..
















Oh yeah,
Aaaaand not everyone that laughs/jokes about being 'drugged up' (in the appropriate settings) are bad people. =) XOXO

Here, "carousing" and "boys nite out on the town" is largely code speak for strip-club-then-brothel. Patronage at these places is rampant with married mid life crisis males, or guys that have been porn fucked.
GPS him.. at least then you'll know.

Or he might have some kind of substance addiction and not even be cheating?

True.

GPS or hair analysis will sort it.

There is free software out there to see what people are doing on a computer. I'm not really a big fan of that, but it might be helpful in your situation.

It's called a keylogger.

I'm not a fan of key-logging your spouse either or the GPS or hair sample but it's none of my business and if she has been as selfless and fair as she says, then desperate times call for desperate measures and she does at least deserves to know what is going on.. It'll give her a better perspective to make a good decision.

Tough situation. Makes me not feel so bad about being single.

Well said.
I wouldn't be a fan of these methods either, it would be a last resort. However the chance of him being honest doesn't sound promising..

Years ago when I was in a similar situation I inadvertently "remote viewed" my spouse doing the deed (100% accurate as it turned out) whilst relaxing/mediating in the bath, so I guess there are less intrusive means...

It could mean nothing but then again..

When returning from a night of carousing, if he hardly comes near you, then heads straight for the shower. GUILTY!


ps. sorry that you're going through this.

the dating sites probably follow anyone who follows the sluts, assuming that person wants some poontang. They mat even be running the slut accounts (fake profiles).
He may not be cheating but it's not a good sign. You need to get things back on track between the two of you.

PS I don't go "carousing " and my wife would never put up with it if I tried.

These things are flashing "emergency emergency! Your relationship is in danger!!!"

Probably means he isnt getting enough poontang :)

He probably misses his BJs, lol. I am being serious here sorry to say. The internet has probably opened his eyes to a new world of sex and debauchary which is turning him on. Your mission, should you choose to accept ot is either turn him off again or take matters into your own hands and really spice up your love life.

You never know you may enjoy yourself.

Yes, looks a bit staged to mee.

Good lord.. So she's not sucking his cock enough?
Sex addict yourself much?

Sex addiction causes harm to others
Symptom: The Behavior Causes Harm To Others

Some of these case histories may sound familiar:

Bob broke promises to friends, family, and co-workers because of his sexually addictive binges.

Marty's children were accidentally exposed to his hardcore pornography.

Luke's family was living from hand to mouth while he spent money on prostitutes.

Instead of the loving, intimate marriage Doreen expected, she struggled with the burden of Henry's deceptions and betrayals.

Sylvia endured years of emotional neglect because Phil spent more time with porn than he did with her.

Sally went without sex for five years and didn't realize that the cause was her husband's sex addiction. She thought there was something wrong with her. Her story is not that unusual.

Another far too common tragedy: Linda caught a sexually transmitted disease from her unfaithful husband.

Going out in public with her husband was hell for Phyllis because he stared at other women as if he were undressing them with his eyes.

Floyd harassed people he was interested in sexually.

etc etc

this...in a good relationship, anyway

There is a much easier way to follow him. If you have a web enabled phone, download google maps, activate the 'live positioning function, leave your phone in his car and log into your goggle account and watch. Remember to turn your phone to silent mode. :0)

I follow around 30,000 people and am being followed by 29,000. It doesn't mean much in that world (at least if you are into marketing, MLM, promotions etc).

Sometimes I delete the SEX ones if I catch them, but it is what it is.