It's never easy to feel misunderstood, and I think that's one of the many common denominators we share. I have felt that way for a long time. That I was missing the key to unlocking my true reality. That inside our very souls, we've always known there's something bigger. Something better. Something we crave, yet we can't identify it therefore we have no way to know how to reach it.
In comparison, we're not unlike the moths that will be drawn to a light...we want & need something brighter in our lives & because we don't know what that is, we sometimes end up chasing our tails for many years.
I'm having an emotional moment here, so please bare with me as I get my thoughts in order
I've always believed that things happen for a reason. Have ~known~ that from a very young age. The feeling of being set on a path in life, knowing that we will experience both good times & bad. That every moment we share, every thought we have, is meant to be a lesson in life. Sorta like the badges the kids earn in girl/boy scouts.
We have free will, and sometimes will veer off the 'straight & narrow'....but because we do have our own versions of 'magnetic north'.....we usually find our path again. Not always, but most of the time.
However, the lessons not learned the first time will need to be repeated over & over until we do.
Those are often referenced as being the 'ruts' of life.
"yeah, I'll be okay, but I gotta find a better job...I'm just in a rut right now"
Every life experience also has an opposite lesson. Something that keeps it in balance with everything else, and the opposite of the 'rut' is 'cloud nine'
"OMG!! I'm on cloud nine!! I just got a promotion at work!!"
Without these karmic ups & downs, there would be no lessons learned. Because how can you truly appreciate the good parts if you've never experienced the bad? You'd not have a point of reference in which to learn anything, ya know?
There are changes that are happening to me on an (almost) daily basis. The 'awakening' people talk about. I hadn't been aware of all these energies around me until recently. If I went shopping or out to eat with the family, I just didn't notice them. I was unaffected by them.
Whomever mentioned the 'shadow' people & things 'moving' (that shouldn't be)...thank you, thank you, thank you...
I'm not sure you can understand how that feels unless you've been in the same position. It's frightening & very worrisome because you do start to question your own sanity.
What about the negative auras? So many people have this black layer of 'goo' around them. It's not really a good thing or a bad thing....it's just not pleasant to be around them. Maybe similar as someone at the end of a 90* day after working in the yard for 8 hours straight. They're dirty...sweaty....they want to take a shower before being social cuz THEY feel gross & uncomfortable.
It's not their fault, of course....but it's there and you both KNOW it's there. They pull away from you while you're backing up from them. Even if it's done on a subconcience level. This uncomfortable knowledge between the two of you, yet nothing is said because we're taught growing up to be nice to each other...taught to be polite.
Unless I really have to, I've been isolating myself quite a bit because I don't know how to process whatever this is....I don't have a point of reference in which to know what I should or should not do with these people. I can't make them wake up, yet I'm constantly saddened at being unable to help them.....it becomes a very strange dance. Not because you ~want~ to avoid them, but because you don't know what to do to help.
Very confusing to try and explain.
Have you ever had a phrase, thought, or part of a movie script get caught up in your head? Something long-term? Something that, although you may not understand it at the time, you're fixated with it. To the point of becoming OCD-ish about being able to decipher what it means, and trying to understand ~why~
it stays with you.
You know it's important in some way, but have no way of knowing what that is. Like a foreign word with no means to translate it's meaning.
If you've not seen the movie 'What Dreams May Come'.....I highly reccommend you watch it. There's something about that film that I feel I'm somehow connected to, altho I honestly couldn't tell you what it is.
I first seen the movie about 10 years ago....was immediately obsessed with it's meaning. Knew that there was a special message intended...maybe meant only for me..... I'm not sure.
There's a specific part in that movie from the character played by Cuba Gooding Jr. From the first second I heard it, I've known it's a 100% fact. The real-deal. No way someone can tell me it's 'just a movie line'...No way at all. Even though up until a few months ago, I had no idea what it referenced, why it stuck with me, and I'm only now beginning to understand it's meaning.
The line was:
'we're seeing what we choose to see..... thought is real. It's the physical that's the illusion, ironic, huh?'
I found the clip...start at about 4:00.