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02:32 AM

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Message Subject I'm a little teapot
Poster Handle Anonymous Coward
Post Content
I'm actually feeling okay about things this morning. Who knows how long that will last.

I was watching the video of some guy last night and he was going on and on about being an assassin, etc, etc. And while I know I went to enough military training camps, it doesn't really mesh with what I've felt about things. Same goes for the monarchs that go on and on about being sex toys, yeah I've had the training to some extent and I'm a masochist, but other than bit roles here and there it doesn't seem to be the focal point of my existence either.

12/22 edit to delete data

While not ideal, it's a bit more soothing of a thought than full time assassin hooker, now isn't it? It actually sort of resonates with a lot of what I am, how I think, what I enjoy, etcetera (not that I intend to work in the field as I feel too compromised for that, but just that it matches me on a personal level). I've always struggled with the concept of should I fight what I am if it was constructed by people I don't trust, yet still I can't exactly erase all of who I am either. We are all products of our upbringing and environments. And, from past experience, I know that erasing everything and starting over doesn't really work in the long run. It's hard to draw lines in the sand when the beach is constantly being eroded and redeposited with sand by the constant struggle that is the system and people that we live among.
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