I QUIT SMOKING , YOU CAN TOO. I QUIT SEPT 27, 2012, SUPPORT EACH OTHER HERE

[link to www.animalliberationfront.com]

Thank you BxMac, I read this at work and I found myself in tears, bawling my eyes out. I couldn't stop them, they poured out of me as I read your post. A good cleansing release at the loss in my life. The loss of the ritual of smoking.

It's true, this devil in disguise I am battling has been a part my persona for close to years. Now I am ready to vanquish it. I want to be free. And yet I am still lured towards the deadly, evil white stick of fire and smoke.

I told no one outside of this thread that I had quit until today. If I failed, I didn't want my family or friends to know I was a loser. My smoking friends I have avoided.

Today, this morning, I lost it with someone I work with over a small thing. This afternoon, I apologized and blurted out I had quit smoking and was having a tough day.

I had taken another step towards the commitment to walk away from cigarettes. His response was not what I expected. He warned me of weight gain. No congrats or yahoo, just, you'll get fat! He is a non smoker. He left the office and I was deflated. Left wondering why I had quit.

Later, I read your post BxMac and remembered why I quit.

For me, to be free.
I do feel like Rocky every day I live smoke free.
The road is long and some days seem to be much easier than others.

Day 19, they say you can break a habit in 21 days, can you also break an addiction of close to 40 years in that time as well?

My brain misfires in an almost electrical way when the need for a cig arises and I feel disconnected, foggy. My brain just doesn't understand why I am not complying by lighting up.
The little voice inside tells me there are cigs at the store. Go to the store.
Not buying cigs once at the store is my victory of the day. At that moment, when I realized I had paid for my stuff and walked out without even thinking about buying cigs while at the checkout was a Rocky moment.

Did stop and stock up on cranberry and water on the way home. Once home, added another 20 qtips to the bag & total, crossed another day off on the calendar and calculated how much money I have saved thus far.

Silly rituals I know, but they keep me aware of the craziness of smoking. Reinforces my decision to quit.

Cheers to the quitters who have inspired me, cheers to the quitters who have stumbled and will try again and cheers to the newbie quitters and those thinking of taking the plunge.

Now please God, give me back my sense of humour and my ability to think clearly.

In return I promise to never, ever, ever get back together with that evil weed!

over.

Thanks for listening.

Wow. That was pretty awesome. I'm not sure if I want to smack Wongmo or hug him, Salt. If spiritual evolution is measured on the rungs of a ladder, I'd have to pole-vault to reach the bottom. I'm not too evolved.

It does seem, after that read, I'm stuck with the cats and the mouse (red bowl and all). I get that. I do.

But I'm drawing a line:

If an elephant shows-up, he better not unpack his trunk.

Canada - What a lovely soul you are. I'm so proud of you. I understand about keeping the quit close to your chest. I do the same thing (in far too many areas of my life - God forbid I look foolish or leave myself vulnerable). Big step to make amends to the co-worker (who, I want to say, is a little dick, but is probably just a person who doesn't get what a life-changing journey you're on) and to state what is so in your life. Damn courageous.

You're doing it. You've lived this day well. I always thought I had to make everything look easy. Do things in smooth fashion. Only recently have I allowed myself to be messy and not do things perfectly. What a fucking relief. I'm a happy idiot now and I like it. You lived this day perfectly by being you. Maybe not the way you'd like, but perfectly because you chose you and your life above the lie we held for so long. I am so happy for you.

Tomorrow's a new day. Starting the 20s. Can you believe it? You're really doing this. Really coming home. A new life. Full. Congratulations, my friend.

Stay close. Together we can do what we can't do alone. I'm so glad you're here.

"Yo, Adriannnnnn!"

Wow...Canada your humility and grace is astonishing in the face of your own inner battle.

I am so glad you joined us!

Your personal experience is profound.

And if I may? In time your humour will return in full force - the bitter with the sweet - right now it all tastes a little bitter.

with love,

soulJAH


oh.... you definitely deserve these....

Hello love -

Thanks for the info about nicotine and depression. Makes sense. IF you are putting a toxic substance in the blood stream through the lungs then the liver will become overloaded. A toxic liver can lead to a toxic blood stream as one of the livers jobs is to keep the blood pure. Impure blood will cross the blood brain barrier and affect the chemical balance of the neurons which will affect your thoughts and emotions.

If I may? If you are not getting what you need through NHS - then why not take the reins and clean your body? Juicing veg especially carrots and beets is great for cleaning the blood. So is anything green - add an apple and it tastes great.

Juicers don't have to be expensive. They just have to be easy to clean. That is the biggest hurdle in juicing - cleaning the juicer.

There are also herbs you can buy as teas or in pill form - online at a discount - that clean the blood and build it. Spirulina , wheat grass...research on line Liver Builders and Cleaners.

Perhaps your journey is not to be on meds - but to be free and clean - yeah it will be hard - that's the stuff warriors are made of.

oneLOVE

soulJAH

Keep checkin in with us. Let us know how your journey is going.

I really enjoy the banter between the two of you!

oneLOVE

soulJAH

HAWK........hellllllooooooo......

How are you today?







oneLOVE

soulJAH

Hello love -

Ready for this????


The spiritual meaning behind mice and why they may be in your life....

[link to www.greatdreams.com]

[link to voices.yahoo.com]

[link to www.whats-your-sign.com]

Thank you for all that you share!


soulJAH

Missed hearing your voice!

One step at a time...eventually you can tackle the addiction to vaping when you are ready.

I can relate Patagonian....

Everytime I quit and picked up was another time of learning what I needed to do or know for this quit.

Keep up the great work!

When it is time you will be back...I look forward to hearing your voice again and your sharing.

To the faithful. DF

Great to her you, OneLove. Really enjoyed the links. Had no idea of the Apollo-Mouse connection. Very interesting.

You sound solid, friend. Centered. Happy for you and trust this finds you well.

Best

Looking forward to your return, Des. Hope the vacation is treating you well.

Thank you. When animals show up in my dwelling or around it I find it fascinating to find out why they may be there and their message for me as I find everything is connected.

A window has opened up today where I can communicate. Can't leave the house but am up from my bed which I am grateful.

Trying to get as much done as I can without overdoing it and catch up with correspondences and connections before the window closes again...

Life is challenging and good.

I have not smoked today and am grateful.

oneLOVE

soulJAH

Break yo self fool, DAY 180!!!!! I feel great for making it this long. So cool that you found the link correlating depression and nicotine. I used to suffer something fierce from depression but I kicked it with stopping the meds, quitting drinking and stopping smoking. My body has been able to gain weight and hold on to it, which I really wanted to. My thoughts are not as deranged as they used to be, well maybe a little less I do still come to GLP. 3-22-13, was supposed to me some mythological day here, well it is for me at day 180. If I can free myself from mental slavery then so can you! Keep on quitting!

Oh, You're Down, Riggs! Amazing 180. 3//22/13. No Doom, but a huge victory for you. Magnificent milestone and a huge accomplishment.

Great Congratulations to you.

Thanks Bx!

DAy 47 I think. Hope everyone here has a great weekend.

47 Hawk! Missed your report this morning, brother, but knew you were doing it well. Weekend's here, Spring is neat sprung and Monday brings "50 ways to leave your......." err, jones for the Hawk.

You "dropped off the key, Lee, and set yourself free."

Just found-out my 88-year-old uncle (not the of the GLP variety) died. My mother's brother. A solid, witty, good man. After the war, he used the GI Bill to earn a BA, MA, and Doctorate at Fordham University while working on loading docks and sleeping on the subway when he ran out of money. After his doctorate, he worked his way up to the number two position in the NYC Board of Ed and stayed there until the City went broke in the '70s. He retired and he and his wife moved to a nudist colony in Florida where they lived for the last 40 years. He became an accomplished pianist and painter in the decade between his 70th and 80th birthdays. He rode a bike for miles (balls flapping against the bar of the bike, smile meeting vistas yet unseen ) daily up until last week. He lived his life well. Music from another room.

Moments ago, my father said my uncle was a stand-up guy and related a story of how he lent my parents his new buick and gave them $100 bucks so they could have a honeymoon for three days in New England. My parents were kids, and on the balls of their ass finacially, and my uncle did them good. They never forgot. About four years ago, I told my uncle about a dark place I had been. Bad ju-ju in New Orleans and a jackpot unresolved. I asked my uncle to keep the tale between us. He simply said, "Joseph, I'll take it with me to the grave and at my age that could be in 15 minutes." Stand-up. As a kid, he had me memorize Kipling's "Gunga Din" so I could recite it at a family Christmas. The donkey Irish, we had to work for our presents.

He sailed the seas in his youth. Shoved-off on Merchant ship. I've heard the hooty owl, tasted the salt, and felt the spray of waves whipped white. Fetch me grog, boy. He had seen some things. Malaya and the Yucatan. Jungles steamy and green. Dolphins jumping over octogons of orange algae.
An hour's dream.

My mother will miss him. She was the youngest and he the oldest of seven kids. They grew-up hard up here in the Bronx. Their mother was a raving, ranting, alcoholic and, on the occasions of her sobriety, she'd read Norman Vincent Peele. I think she missed "How To Win Friends and Influence People." A hard woman. First generation here. Alone. The kids learned how to look out for each other. They all did ok. My uncle especially looked-out for my mother, Maggie. And she will miss him much. They called every Sunday at 5:00 p.m. For years and years. Without fail. Like clockwork. The silence this Sunday will vibrate. It will shake the walls and move the floor. For my mother. At 5:00 p.m. This, I know, will be true.

No horse will pull my uncle's hearse. No flowers flutter in the wake of the wheels. No pipes will mourn his passing and he will go like all others. Remembered or forgotten. Loved or forsaken. Blood of my blood. Captains Courageous. Harken the Charge of the Light Brigade. His ashes under the Bayon tree. I'd scatter them if I could. I'd set him off on a flaming pyre across smooth waters. To meet the boatman with an obal. To steer him to his rest. A good and honorable man. I loved him.

Until that time, my uncle. God Bless and keep you. Until that time.

good morning, compadres

today is my 82nd day without smoking. i feel really good. still healing and re-balancing, but feel good.

tonight i have a date. this will be my first date since my husband died a little over two years ago. i'm nervous. this guy is a good one. a good man with no hidden agenda. i wanna give this a shot. but everything in me wants to cancel. and, it's all because of fear.

i'm not worried i will smoke. luckily, he is a quitter like us with about 5 months without smoking.

but, i still have not acquired my new "skin" yet that my former habit used to pretend to provide. i feel a bit out of my element without my cigarette security guard. i'm going this one alone, and it's virgin territory.

so, i don my warrior stance and refuse to chump out. what are my options?

your support and prayers are appreciated.


God's blessing to you today.

Big night, Salt. He's a lucky guy. Just bring you along. No "A Game," no expectations, no white paper security guards.

He sounds like a good guy and just right for your first date since your husband. Nice you'll be meeting him while holding God's hand.

Be young at heart and open. Because you are.

A great night ahead. Happy for you. You deserve it, Sister.

Big night, Salt. He's a lucky guy. Just bring you along. No "A Game," no expectations, no white paper security guards.

He sounds like a good guy and just right for your first date since your husband. Nice you'll be meeting him while holding God's hand.

Be young at heart and open. Because you are.

A great night ahead. Happy for you. You deserve it, Sister.

Enjoy yourself Salt...just be you.

(That's my prayer of support for you).

If I may? From what I have learned about you through this thread - it seems like the cigarette smoking is the first step to allowing love back into your heart - love, just for you.

If you can count your rotations around the sun near mine, early 50's, than you might appreciate my experience. I engage in relationships with a whole new perspective in my 50's. And the gift of experience brings a new confidence just being me. I have learned a lot, have much to continue to learn, and my life - suffering and joy and and everything else between, has been a gift to travel through.

Enjoy!!!! Carpe Diem

oneLOVE

soulJAH

well, nevermind the date. roads closed here due to weather and the night we planned has been postponed until next weekend. oh well...