Depression because of GLP

I've been on here for a year now and I think it's bad for me. Sometimes I experience high anxiety. I lay in bed at night waiting for the ground to shake. I sit on my porch listening for strange air noises. I recently cleaned out a dollar store of every can of meat they had on the shelf.....and they had almost $300 worth. Yesterday I went to the dollar store for some laundry detergent and came out with three can openers. I already owned four can openers.

I go from anxiety to depression. Nothing happens and it gets me down. Why in the hell would I be depressed that cataclysmic disaster hasn't wiped out millions of lives? I mean isn't that some psychotic shit?

As I write this I have my front door open (five feet from me) to let the nice air in through the screen door, but I'm so worried that a black Obama mob is going to bust in that I have a 1911 sitting on top of my desk within arms reach, with one in the chamber.

I keep a secondary stockpile of supplies in a remote location. My closet is so full of buckets of rice, sugar, flour, and beans that I have no where to keep my clothes. I could walk out my door right now, get in the car and go camping for a week just off what I keep in the trunk.

There is a 9mm in my bedroom under my pillow and a 9 inch knife on my night stand.

My fb friends think I'm crazy. Some have unfriended me. People that I have known all my life have started walking the other way when they see me in the store. I keep telling myself that they'll see just how smart I am when SHTF.

Tonight I'm depressed because nothing is happening. Do I need help or am I just smarter than the sheep?

I've been on here for a year now and I think it's bad for me. Sometimes I experience high anxiety. I lay in bed at night waiting for the ground to shake. I sit on my porch listening for strange air noises. I recently cleaned out a dollar store of every can of meat they had on the shelf.....and they had almost $300 worth. Yesterday I went to the dollar store for some laundry detergent and came out with three can openers. I already owned four can openers.

I go from anxiety to depression. Nothing happens and it gets me down. Why in the hell would I be depressed that cataclysmic disaster hasn't wiped out millions of lives? I mean isn't that some psychotic shit?

As I write this I have my front door open (five feet from me) to let the nice air in through the screen door, but I'm so worried that a black Obama mob is going to bust in that I have a 1911 sitting on top of my desk within arms reach, with one in the chamber.

I keep a secondary stockpile of supplies in a remote location. My closet is so full of buckets of rice, sugar, flour, and beans that I have no where to keep my clothes. I could walk out my door right now, get in the car and go camping for a week just off what I keep in the trunk.

There is a 9mm in my bedroom under my pillow and a 9 inch knife on my night stand.

My fb friends think I'm crazy. Some have unfriended me. People that I have known all my life have started walking the other way when they see me in the store. I keep telling myself that they'll see just how smart I am when SHTF.

Tonight I'm depressed because nothing is happening. Do I need help or am I just smarter than the sheep?

You can never have enough can openers!

I don't have a job, but I am a full time student. I make top grades so it does consume almost as much time as a full time job.

What the hell is a yob?

Best gore leaves me very disturbed. The last time I watched it two mexicans got their throats cut all the way open, one with a chainsaw. The gurgling noises were horrifying.