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So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...

 
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:19 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
thanks to the last few posters above me. i wouldnt say i was "expecting" something from him, he was telling me he was getting me something so i expected it because he told me to.
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
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10/25/2012 04:21 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I'm not trying to be selfish and I really don't want to come across that way so if this is just irrational thinking then please let me know people

...I just really was expecting something a little more sentimental after a year. I'm glad he thought of the gesture and tha he took the time off his lunch break the day before to go get it for me, and I really love him, i just thought I'd get something a little more personal and intimate.

What do you guys think about this? I'm curious
 Quoting: luckyophelia


OP...he's a practical guy. And I know how you feel. Girls expect to have fun girly things. But I say enjoy him and the thought anyway. I had an x give me a down comforter 35 years ago...I still have it even though he's long gone. The important thing is...you have love in a partner who remembered you on "your day" and it's better than spending your birthday alone at work and no one remembers. You tend to take those things for granted sometimes. You're a lucky girl.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 25986193


thanks <3

hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 7061022
United States
10/25/2012 04:23 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I think that having expectations of gifts is kind've low, especially if you actually "love him."
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1129812


You don't get it, she expected something personal.

My hubby typically buys me just a card, but he decorates with a lot of sill stuff that makes it special.

I am sure the OP would have preferred a hand-made card than a comforter.
Unit3

User ID: 9834739
United States
10/25/2012 04:29 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
i really truly love this person, with all my heart. I do believe he could be "the one." Ii'm not expecting fairy tales or diamond rings or fancy houses...It's more that I feel hurt by other things that he's done because it makes me feel as if he doesn't care or isn't serious as another poster put it. I want him to love me as much as I love him...and I want him to show me he does because right now im having doubts. I just wish he would show me a little attention is all. Feeling unwanted isn't the best feeling in the world.
 Quoting: luckyophelia





I think it's time to sit down and have a heart to heart conversation with him. In this thread, we are all trying to guess what's going on with him and I don't think that's fair to both of you.

If you have a good relationship, a heart to heart could make it better. Show that you want to hear what he has to say, even if it might hurt.

I feel you have too much up in the air about what's going on between you to have a strong relationship. Make it better! I think you can do it. And, good luck.

Btw, my husband says he isn't romantic. But, if I wait long enough and keep my mouth shut, he does some of the most romantic things ever. (about once per year, LOL)


hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 10646155
Netherlands
10/25/2012 04:30 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I think that having expectations of gifts is kind've low, especially if you actually "love him."
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1129812


You don't get it, she expected something personal.

My hubby typically buys me just a card, but he decorates with a lot of sill stuff that makes it special.

I am sure the OP would have preferred a hand-made card than a comforter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7061022


Haha, LOL, I will try this next time.
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:34 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
thanks, wonderful advice! this was the kind of feedback I was looking for and I really appreciate it :)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1291850
United States
10/25/2012 04:34 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
from old lady here,,,
wait until you are married...then you get things like vacuum cleaners and leaf blowers....
sigh....
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11211450


Those were both hints.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19880158
United States
10/25/2012 04:41 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
To the OP...

I have been married for 14 years to a great woman that stuck with me when I was a poor college student and could not afford much in the way of gifts..

Although we are very finanacially secure these days, She appreciates everything little thing I do, and still tells me to this day that all she wants is me on birthdays and Christmas..

I have bought her expensive jewelry and she has taken it back.. not a big deal to her.. all she wants is to know that I love her..


I hope you can find what you are looking for.
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:43 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
To the OP...

I have been married for 14 years to a great woman that stuck with me when I was a poor college student and could not afford much in the way of gifts..

Although we are very finanacially secure these days, She appreciates everything little thing I do, and still tells me to this day that all she wants is me on birthdays and Christmas..

I have bought her expensive jewelry and she has taken it back.. not a big deal to her.. all she wants is to know that I love her..


I hope you can find what you are looking for.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19880158


thank you!
we're both financially secure so thats not an issue that we have to worry about which im grateful for. its true though, i just wanted him all along :)
a man who finally speaks words of wisdom!

Last Edited by luckyophelia on 10/25/2012 04:44 PM
Anonymous Coward
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Germany
10/25/2012 04:44 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
No, it's not about the cost of a gift but the sentiment!

if you were a guy, I would say OK, but you aren't.

He bought it on his lunch hour, he's NOT, that in to

you, if he were, he would have SEARCHED High and Low

for the perfect gift to Please YOU, It's not about $


It's about your Heart. When you shack with a guy, this
is what you get.
 Quoting: impetigo 7446418


hf

thanks for your insight
 Quoting: luckyophelia


I can't make out if this story of yours is a sweet fabrication for your own amusement or true.

Because i am totally bewildered that this could honestly be a question to somebody else -- which is so blatantly obvious to me and as clear as the summers sun.

So, in case it's true,

The above poster has the answer.
You are not "the one" for him.
Don't waste time and energy.
Call it off quickly, putting it off worsens the whole shebang.

(shakes head)
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 23579473
United States
10/25/2012 04:45 PM

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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
OP what did you buy him for your 1 year anniversary????

(sorry if it was already covered, I can't read 9 pages of history, lol)

Last Edited by ANHEDONIC on 10/25/2012 04:45 PM

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:45 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
No, it's not about the cost of a gift but the sentiment!

if you were a guy, I would say OK, but you aren't.

He bought it on his lunch hour, he's NOT, that in to

you, if he were, he would have SEARCHED High and Low

for the perfect gift to Please YOU, It's not about $


It's about your Heart. When you shack with a guy, this
is what you get.
 Quoting: impetigo 7446418


hf

thanks for your insight
 Quoting: luckyophelia


I can't make out if this story of yours is a sweet fabrication for your own amusement or true.

Because i am totally bewildered that this could honestly be a question to somebody else -- which is so blatantly obvious to me and as clear as the summers sun.

So, in case it's true,

The above poster has the answer.
You are not "the one" for him.
Don't waste time and energy.
Call it off quickly, putting it off worsens the whole shebang.

(shakes head)
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26293527


true.

i guess its mostly me dealing with conflicting aspects of myself. we're all a reflection of each other anyway right?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26295391
United States
10/25/2012 04:46 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
imo you don't deserve him
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 7061022
United States
10/25/2012 04:54 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I think that having expectations of gifts is kind've low, especially if you actually "love him."
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1129812


You don't get it, she expected something personal.

My hubby typically buys me just a card, but he decorates with a lot of sill stuff that makes it special.

I am sure the OP would have preferred a hand-made card than a comforter.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7061022


Haha, LOL, I will try this next time.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 10646155


Yes, I almost cry.

He even gets the dogs to sign the card.

Be creative and sweet and she will love you for it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 23097787
United States
10/25/2012 04:54 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
Materialism...

"I was really expecting some expensive jewelry..."


Let me ask you something, OPette. What are you getting him for his bday?
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:55 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
imo you don't deserve him
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26295391


maybe you're right. im posting on here to process whether or not this is me being an insensitive cold hearted selfish bitch, or someone who's being ignored/neglected in the relationship in other ways so ive projected my feelings into the fact that he got me a blanket
Anonymous Coward
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10/25/2012 04:56 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
imo you don't deserve him
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26295391


Yeah, women will line up for a guy that hands out comforters.
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 04:56 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
now i just decide on whether or not to just be grateful for him and not even worry about the comforter or about the gift he gave me, or whether or not i should have a talk on how he makes me feel in other aspects of the relationship. maybe both?
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 05:00 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
Materialism...

"I was really expecting some expensive jewelry..."


Let me ask you something, OPette. What are you getting him for his bday?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23097787


I wasn't expecting jewelry. i was more interested in what he'd say in an imaginary letter i thought he'd write lol.
I'm not sure what I want to get him yet. its in about a month or so I'm still thinking but maybe a nice wrist watch and new sunglasses with an ipod so he can listen to music in his truck. And of course a sappy letter lol.
What do guys like?

Last Edited by luckyophelia on 10/25/2012 05:01 PM
Anonymous Coward
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10/25/2012 05:01 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
from old lady here,,,
wait until you are married...then you get things like vacuum cleaners and leaf blowers....
sigh....
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 11211450


Those were both hints.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1291850


HAHA!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1385340
United States
10/25/2012 05:03 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
OP what did you buy him for your 1 year anniversary????

(sorry if it was already covered, I can't read 9 pages of history, lol)
 Quoting: ANHEDONIC


well, since you missed the previous 9 pages, you didn't get to see the cool part where he makes her sleep in the garage, lol.

other details:

comforter dude "was going to" give his ex $5k, an apartment, and a car. but op does get a nice comforter so it's even.

comforter dude's ex is in her 40s. he dated her for 9 years, but only just now got around to losing his virginity to op a few months ago.

op frequently treats comforter dude to purty paintings and original keyboard music.

hardly anyone said "run bitch, run!" lol.
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 23579473
United States
10/25/2012 05:06 PM

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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
OP what did you buy him for your 1 year anniversary????

(sorry if it was already covered, I can't read 9 pages of history, lol)
 Quoting: ANHEDONIC


well, since you missed the previous 9 pages, you didn't get to see the cool part where he makes her sleep in the garage, lol.

other details:

comforter dude "was going to" give his ex $5k, an apartment, and a car. but op does get a nice comforter so it's even.

comforter dude's ex is in her 40s. he dated her for 9 years, but only just now got around to losing his virginity to op a few months ago.

op frequently treats comforter dude to purty paintings and original keyboard music.

hardly anyone said "run bitch, run!" lol.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1385340


lmao

Thanks for filling me in...

Although I have to say the separate bed rooms is a great idea.... Personal space is important. : )

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 2530461
United States
10/25/2012 05:10 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I think he was trying to buy something that he thought would make you happy. As a man I would say that buying a comforter is something that I wouldn't spend 5 minutes thinking about if it was for myself.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26293527
Germany
10/25/2012 05:12 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
now i just decide on whether or not to just be grateful for him and not even worry about the comforter or about the gift he gave me, or whether or not i should have a talk on how he makes me feel in other aspects of the relationship. maybe both?
 Quoting: luckyophelia


No,
you shed a few tears, move out,
and work on your self-esteem.

Best wishes,
Lemon

User ID: 26275465
United States
10/25/2012 05:18 PM

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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
Just skimmed through.

I'm amazed.

He keeps you as a pet he has sex with in his garage.

For the aniversary perhapse a shiny collar? (interesting necklace symbolism)

My dog is treated better than you are, but I love my dog (& got her a new blankie & lounge pillow on her birthday).

Wow - just run.
THREE LAWS OF TYRANNY
(Could be read as "Three Laws of Bullying" ? )

Tyranny Law #1:
"Any power that can be abused will be abused."

Tyranny Law #2:
"Abuse always expands to fill the limits of resistance to it."

Tyranny Law #3:
"If people don't resist the abuses of others, they will have no one to resist the abuses of themselves, and tyranny will prevail."
Kirk

User ID: 25384388
United States
10/25/2012 05:20 PM

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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
OP what did you buy him for your 1 year anniversary????

(sorry if it was already covered, I can't read 9 pages of history, lol)
 Quoting: ANHEDONIC


well, since you missed the previous 9 pages, you didn't get to see the cool part where he makes her sleep in the garage, lol.

other details:

comforter dude "was going to" give his ex $5k, an apartment, and a car. but op does get a nice comforter so it's even.

comforter dude's ex is in her 40s. he dated her for 9 years, but only just now got around to losing his virginity to op a few months ago.

op frequently treats comforter dude to purty paintings and original keyboard music.

hardly anyone said "run bitch, run!" lol.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1385340


I missed that. Damn, that's kinky. Too crazy for me. I would adios when he's at work.
Worry is a misuse of the imagination.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
10/25/2012 05:21 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
Lol

But I think a comforter is a good gift and can be sentimental if given with love. Also a cute idea.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19549273
Canada
10/25/2012 05:26 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
To the OP...

I have been married for 14 years to a great woman that stuck with me when I was a poor college student and could not afford much in the way of gifts..

Although we are very finanacially secure these days, She appreciates everything little thing I do, and still tells me to this day that all she wants is me on birthdays and Christmas..

I have bought her expensive jewelry and she has taken it back.. not a big deal to her.. all she wants is to know that I love her..


I hope you can find what you are looking for.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19880158


thank you!
we're both financially secure so thats not an issue that we have to worry about which im grateful for. its true though, i just wanted him all along :)
a man who finally speaks words of wisdom!
 Quoting: luckyophelia


If you're sleeping in a cold garage you are not financially secure. Thread is a bunch of lies.
Dr Phil

User ID: 26248246
New Zealand
10/25/2012 05:29 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
I'm not trying to be selfish and I really don't want to come across that way so if this is just irrational thinking then please let me know people

...I just really was expecting something a little more sentimental after a year. I'm glad he thought of the gesture and tha he took the time off his lunch break the day before to go get it for me, and I really love him, i just thought I'd get something a little more personal and intimate.

What do you guys think about this? I'm curious
 Quoting: luckyophelia


Just wondering,was it a big,pink"comforter"with a rotating head?
luckyophelia (OP)

User ID: 18046556
United States
10/25/2012 05:31 PM
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Re: So my Boyfriend Got me a Comforter for my Birthday After 1 Year of Dating...
To the OP...

I have been married for 14 years to a great woman that stuck with me when I was a poor college student and could not afford much in the way of gifts..

Although we are very finanacially secure these days, She appreciates everything little thing I do, and still tells me to this day that all she wants is me on birthdays and Christmas..

I have bought her expensive jewelry and she has taken it back.. not a big deal to her.. all she wants is to know that I love her..


I hope you can find what you are looking for.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19880158


thank you!
we're both financially secure so thats not an issue that we have to worry about which im grateful for. its true though, i just wanted him all along :)
a man who finally speaks words of wisdom!
 Quoting: luckyophelia


If you're sleeping in a cold garage you are not financially secure. Thread is a bunch of lies.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19549273


its not like some super damn dungeon he's got some space heaters and stuff. am i being jaded?

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