Any suggestions on how to forget an old love 25 years ago?

rip out your heart or put a shotgun shell through it

if that doesn't work then give up cause

no matter what you do you can never replace the memories of happiness while you were together

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I am not posting another post on this thread. This is my final post.

It took me years to get past my first boyfriend from 30 years ago. Then finally found him, wrote and found out about his happy fulfilling life with his wife and family.

That was all it took. Just picture her with her current husband and it will help you to move on.

OP do you live within 100 miles of this person?

Did you play Dire Straits music back then also?

What could be the memory that lingers so in your heart that keeps you there still? The words that they loved you? Did this person have children they needed to care for as that always comes into play?

Don't forget it. Remember the good times, but also realize it's a fantasy.

Yes, Yes, and Yes.

Any suggestions on how to forget an old love 25 years ago?

...quit stalking and get a life?

Works for most normal folk, what's you're excuse?

I am NOT stalking. I am trying to forget a memory.

You got issue's op, I myself occasionaly think about a Lady i think of as the only lady i ever loved. truth is it was infatuation. she had a tight little bum. Other than that not much else there, self absorbed and happy to manipulate me and all the boys around her.
Get your head glued on staright, become one of the rock solid types that realize being independent and very secure, single is the most sane way to be. You have created a obsession, a manifestation. no one is responsible but you.

You need to develope some skills and interests, after you burn your genitals with the curling iron get some land and start clearing brush. Purge your silly mind.

Wow, this is my life. From the other side. OP, I am the 'true love' woman who has been found by the man who thought he could never get over me.
He found me, of course, on FB, after I finally joined. Yes, it is true. And we chatted and had a great time for months, nearly a year.
I am trim. I am fit. I look good for a woman my age. But that's just it. He was expecting Heidi Klum to get off that plane. He'd seen me plenty over video cam. That awful quality video. Hides wrinkles and saggy skin just great. I tried to warn him, tried to tell him, but he said it didn't matter, I looked good to him.
Well, I now feel the sting of not being 28 again, the age I was when he loved me so. He would have loved me like he did before, if I looked like I did then. And I have no fat! I have great muscles! But time does take it's toll. There's no escaping. He admires me! He loves my genuis! It is not the same.
I read the ardor in his words before we saw each other. And I read the total lack of ardor in his words now. We kissed goodbye in the airport like we were friendly cousins. yeah, he's gone fat and flabby. I have not, not at all. But it doesn't matter. Men are wired to respond to that young, fertile girl ... that's all there is to it.
He also told me at one time that he was so hooked into how I had loved him then.
We certainly still chat. But I've just read some of our chats from before we met up, and boy.. I wish I could go back to that again. It was so wonderful to be thought of and desired like that. I hated to meet up with him, because I knew this would be the result. How could it be otherwise?
He is a sweetheart. He is still the smartest man in the room wherever he goes. Well educated, excellent job and financials.
I would love to be that woman he loved. I really would. I'd love to please him like that. It isn't like he's some pig who doesn't appreciate a woman of a certain age, but there's a realistic truth.
My husband of so many years died a couple years ago. He is the one who loved me for all the domestic reasons, all the years of in-laws, all the holidays, the years of separation and then the finding each other again. His heart just stopped with a sudden heart attack and could not be
started again. He is the one with reasons to love me, wrinkles and all.
So focus on yourself, on everything you can do to make yourself the best person you can ever be. The person you'd want to be if 'she' were looking at you in every moment. Life doesn't give us what we want always. Keep calm and carry on. (!)
And my best to you.

and if you had something to say to her/him now

what would it be

if l may, allow me to answer for him/her : "I'm sorry."

Get a life!

I was the same way for a few years. Husband and children later and still 'opined'.

You just have to accept that He had a path for you......whether you like it or not. And it's a beautiful path. I learned to accept this and am soooooooo glad!

Couldn't ask for a more beautiful family and love them so much.....and the satisfaction that I can play a role in their lives and love them.

The guy I 'opined' about about has a great wife and two, lovely kids. I WANT him to be happy. He deserves that. Who am I to decide HIS life, after all? That's NOT my decision.

why forget?

enjoy the memories... ring, say hello, do nothing.. it's that easy...

No need to forget ... you just a need to put it into perpsective.

You have wonderful feelings about that individual ... and you obviously had a wonderful time when you were together. Those OLD feelings and those good memories will always be there and always should be there.

Today though is many years removed from those times, and the person YOU were THEN is NOT the same person you are today and the person THEY were THEN is NOT the same person they are TODAY. You can NOT recreate those times and connection with that person today, even if you ran into them, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOW DIFFERENT PEOPLE AT A DIFFERENT STAGE OF YOUR LIFE and have been through VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES!!

Most people only genuinely "Fall in Love (ie: have the STRONG brain chemical addiction to another occure) 2 to 4 times in their lives. TREASURE the memories that you have of the person that it occured with, but also realize it for what it is, a Brain Chemical Addiction which acts on your brain just like any other adediction.

Once you put the OLD vs. the CURRENT situation into perspective and accept the fact that what you are dealing with is a Brain Chemical Addiction then you will be able to move on ... without also forgetting the specialness of what you previously experienced.

Best of luck!

Google his/her name. Go to ussearch.com and intelius.com. If it's a female, use her maiden name. Add an approximate age and where she once lived. You will see names on the right. It might include the husband's name and children. Check all of them out on facebook. Write a "message" to them privately. She/he might like to know you're thinking about her/him.

Also, his/her name might be on linkedin.

I have found people this way. Before we had the internet, I found a "lost love" by calling his college. They gave me an address and phone number and I called him one day. We were 800 miles apart, and tried to make it work after being apart for 30 years. It didn't work, and we tried for 10 years. He wasn't who I thought he was 30 years ago when I was very young then and getting lost in his blue eyes....lol.

It's so obvious.
A new love 25 years old...

You take a look at their current picture and interview all their ex's.

LOL

Seriously, we all have our fond memories of when we were young, beautiful and free. Life beats us up and we wish we could go back.

Me thinks alot of your feelings are nostalgia.

Last Edited by Earth Daughter on 10/28/2012 11:15 AM

You still haven't said if you are a he or a she you fucking Troll....

I really think you should try making a contact. It will make a difference. I was so in love with a high school boyfriend. Years later we saw each other at a 20 or 25 year reunion, and I still found him very appealing; he was married for a second time. His wife was pretty.

Afterwards, he started calling me. He was very catty and was putting down all his high school guy friends...my classmates also, whom I liked. This was a turn-off for me. THEN he complained about his wife and how she didn't trust him. His next sentence was, "So can we get together? I'm still in love with you."

Hmmmm...no wonder the wife doesn't trust him! I found him repulsive after that.

You've never been in love, have you? In fact, I'm assuming that because of your attitude, no one has cared deeply for you....except your parents.

Easy look them up and spend some time with them. Even if there married see if you guys could just all meet (you bring a date) somewhere. People change after all that time and you are in love with an image of who they were, or who you thought they were. It worked for me, thought i would get over him, over the years had he changed not even remotely the guy i thought he would be (physically and mentally). I was in love with the image i conjured in my head of what he did look like and the guy i thought he was going to be. He changed and i changed, so, I think most of the time if it doesn't work out there is a reason always, you just may not see if for a few years. So quit wasting your time and years pining for something that never was!

Yes...I did, five times. One was the father of my children, whom I married and divorced after 32 years. But there were three others that I wondered about. Over the years, I have contacted all four and have never regretted it. It sure is better than "wondering what he's doing."