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The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario

 
Shelgeyr

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11/01/2012 12:08 AM

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The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
I love this article:

[link to atomicmonkeyactionsquad.blogspot.com]

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Excerpt:

Yet again, Hollywood has gotten it all wrong. There is now an entire cinematic genre based on a complete misconception: A "Zombie Apocalypse" is not a worst-case scenario. In fact as far as Apocalypses go, it should be considered the Best Case Scenario.

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There's a big table titled "What They Would Label The Act of Randomly Shooting Approaching Entities, by Apocalypse Type", which covers quite a lot of categories.

And seriously - how can you go wrong with TWO references to Summer Glau?
snark

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11/01/2012 01:02 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
shakeit
T For Texas, T For Tennessee!


The virtue of courage is a prerequisite for the practice of all other virtues, because otherwise one is virtuous only when virtue has no cost. There are times when something needs to be done, and yet we know that if we step up and do this needful thing, we will pay a heavy personal price. -C.S. Lewis
Anonymous Coward
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11/01/2012 01:24 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Dude, I totally agree at least you have a fighting chance with zombies.
Shelgeyr (OP)

User ID: 6321116
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11/04/2012 02:19 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
So what is Summer Glau up to these days anyways?
Shelgeyr (OP)

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11/06/2012 07:16 AM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
From the article:

* Zombies don’t lead Personality Cults.

* There will be no elections between living and Zombie candidates where the living ones squabble so much they split their base and end up getting the Zombie elected.

* A significant percentage of the population will not be persuaded that “even though they’re not really in favor of them”, the Zombie’s policies and agenda are tolerable “for the duration of the crisis”.

* Although they’re certainly hungry, Zombies do not confiscate, much less redistribute, food.

* None of your neighbors will be co-opted into a secret police looking to rat you out to the Zombies.

* Zombies do not create websites with creepy slide shows extolling the virtues of living under their rule.

* Zombies don’t gather and maintain databases of your personal, commercial, or medical information.

* Zombies, ironically, don’t impose gun-control laws.

* Under no circumstance would Zombies ever be put in charge of the Fed, although now that I think about it, that’s kind of sad because it would HAVE to be an improvement, and besides – no Zombie is either stupid or evil enough to ever try to monetize the national debt. I guess nothing’s perfect.

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[link to atomicmonkeyactionsquad.blogspot.com]

Read it all, and go vote today, Zombie Hunters!
snark

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11/06/2012 12:07 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
T For Texas, T For Tennessee!


The virtue of courage is a prerequisite for the practice of all other virtues, because otherwise one is virtuous only when virtue has no cost. There are times when something needs to be done, and yet we know that if we step up and do this needful thing, we will pay a heavy personal price. -C.S. Lewis
Anonymous Coward
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11/06/2012 12:55 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bumphiding
Shelgeyr (OP)

User ID: 6321116
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11/13/2012 02:23 AM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
Shelgeyr (OP)

User ID: 6321116
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11/17/2012 11:17 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
I'm thinking that behind the humor there might be some decent advice in the comparison table.
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2012 04:54 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Zombies!

I don't get why they said the apes smelled good...
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2012 08:40 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Free ur mind from mental slavery. X
samanthasunflower

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11/18/2012 09:13 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
clappa
Anonymous Coward
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11/22/2012 03:25 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
Anonymous Coward
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11/22/2012 03:58 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
9 MEALS AWAY FROM COLLAPSE, WHEN AMERICANS FOOD RUN OUT THEY WILL BE ZOMBIES, THEN THEY WILL EAT PEOPLE AND THE MILTARY WILL SHOOT THEM.
Redpaw360

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11/22/2012 04:03 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Got my vote for best thread of the day.

Thanks OP.
Oregon Constitution Article I, Section 27

The people shall have the right to bear arms for the defence of themselves, and the State, but the Military shall be kept in strict subordination to the civil power.
Anonymous Coward
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12/10/2012 12:44 AM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
Anonymous Coward
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01/02/2013 12:38 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Heh. Bump.

So will the Farm Bill parts of the Fiscal Cliff bill hasten or delay the ZA?
RayGun

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01/02/2013 12:43 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
So what is Summer Glau up to these days anyways?
 Quoting: Shelgeyr


Probably being smoking hot and sexy. bounceb
Anonymous Coward
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01/02/2013 03:19 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Hey they left off "the homeless". I'm surprised they missed the obvious Southpark homage.

"Change? Change? Change?"

Especially topical since the election!
Anonymous Coward
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01/02/2013 03:31 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Man I fucking hope it's the zombie apocalypse
Shelgeyr (OP)

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01/02/2013 08:34 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
In the unlikely chance we're given a choice, me too!

zombies
Shelgeyr (OP)

User ID: 6321116
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01/03/2013 08:41 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
South Park homeless as zombies:

[link to www.dvdverdict.com]
Anonymous Coward
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01/04/2013 02:29 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
Shelgeyr (OP)

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01/05/2013 06:09 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
Thanks for the bump!
Shelgeyr (OP)

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01/09/2013 11:54 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
They need to update the chart with "Liberal Gun-Grabbers" as an Apocalypse type. They're already getting past the "infestation" stage!
Shelgeyr (OP)

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01/13/2013 09:10 PM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump
Shelgeyr (OP)

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01/17/2013 01:18 AM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
zombies

Groarw!
Anonymous Coward
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03/20/2013 09:28 PM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
bump

Just waitin' for the zombies!
Anonymous Coward
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03/21/2013 10:51 AM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
BRAINNNNNS!!! BRAINNNS!!!! (said by a starving zombie vainly searching for food at the DNC)
Shelgeyr (OP)

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03/23/2013 09:53 AM

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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
BRAINNNNNS!!! BRAINNNS!!!! (said by a starving zombie vainly searching for food at the DNC)
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1964511


Ha!
Anonymous Coward
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03/26/2013 11:02 AM
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Re: The Zombie Apocalypse is the Best Case Scenario
The zombies are gonna come for us all! And they'll be armed with Executive Orders to seize more than just brains, I tell you!

I agree with this post - Zombies are a better option for an apocalypse than federal agents or Obamacare staff or whatever.

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