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What makes men not want to have sex?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 2990625
United States
11/04/2012 08:34 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Two things:


PORNOGRAPHY AND YOUR WEIGHT.

You are no longer the attractive woman who had nice outfits and great figure. You resorted to food to hide your depression so I am sure you are 20 to 40 pounds overweight. NO MAN LIKES A FAT CHICK. Why do you think they go to strip clubs? To see fat chicks? No way....

The solution:

Lose weight and engage on sport activities. A gym, running club, go to wine tastings with him. Have more sex regularly and dress sexier. He will lose interest for porn and change his focus to you.

I know this formula will work for most unhappy overweight American chicks who wonder why their boyfriends or husbands are not paying attention to them.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26967861
United States
11/04/2012 08:35 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Just trying to understand my husbands sex drive. Is it normal that my sex drive is higher than his? What should I do?
 Quoting: Sparkles 7183572


Be sexy. Try losing 100 lbs. Stop acting masculine. Oh, and if you insisted that he be in the delivery room when you gave birth, he's probably still traumatized from seeing what no man should ever see.
THE Professor !
User ID: 26913454
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11/04/2012 08:35 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
After 3 wives, and dating over 400 women in 12 years between the 2nd and last marriage, I can HONESTLY say men finally get TIRED of manipulative sex from just about day one of ANY RELATIONSHIP, where WOMEN wield the POWER over IF and WHEN it happens.

Yes, when your older, your NOT as horny as you were in your 20 - 50s,. but we DO finally realize we DON'T like this control GAME ! That is when it becomes revenge time, NOT just with NO sex, but we have the chance to be in CONTROL and it feels GOOD ! Most important is how YOU reacted to his fist failure to have an erection. My third wife laughed and that was the LAST TIME I ever let her have the chance ! She hung on for three years before she gave up ! Sad really !
Anonymous Coward
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11/04/2012 08:36 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
many factors in this vague post
seer

User ID: 1529717
United States
11/04/2012 08:36 PM

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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
probably has low testosterone from soy and plastics......
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7183572
Canada
11/04/2012 08:37 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
i was a husband like this. sometimes you go long periods without and that becomes your new routine. i really had to see that my wife missed that intimacy and needed it then we really worked at getting the flame back and our sex life is amazing now. about every day of the week.

some of these answers are from idiots but some have merit. maybe try something new and interesting. go outdoors or something like that. maybe get some new night things. but dont change yourself just to please him. be confident and that is the sexiest thing of all. my wife and i have been married 13 years and she is still the sexiest woman i know. it is attitude. but most of all let him know how you miss it and not because you are a sex addict, most women seem to desire closeness of being intimate with their partner. it is important.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26954555


Thank you so much. You are 100 percent right....I just love him so much and it is hard to be so confident when I am so unsure as a result of his actions. I will try...if not for him for me! Thanks again
Spittin'Cesium

User ID: 14589973
United Kingdom
11/04/2012 08:37 PM

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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Personally?

Animals.
The thing that hath been,
is That which shall be;
and that which is done is that which shall be done:and there is no new thing under the Sun.
Ecclesiastes 9:1
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 24642485
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11/04/2012 08:37 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
It could be for a number of reasons honestly so my advice would be to talk with him. Not in a prying way, but in a concerned way. Possibilities?

Stress

Health Issue (Men are notorious for not saying something when they don't feel good or developing an issue, like say, E.D.)

Insecurity

Outside interest (Can't just say a woman nowadays, it could also be a man.)

Fading Attraction

I say take him out on a date. Dress sexy as hell. Sometimes a man needs to see that other men still want his lady to remember what he has.

The main thing though would be to speak to him. Husband and wife should ideally be able to discuss anything so try that.

hf
Lex
User ID: 25765173
United States
11/04/2012 08:38 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Put on a slutty outfit and grill him a steak.
Pretend its nothing out of the ordinary.
Then wait for him naked in the hot tub.

And tell him he owes me a case of beer.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 20766750
United States
11/04/2012 08:39 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Just trying to understand my husbands sex drive. Is it normal that my sex drive is higher than his? What should I do?
 Quoting: Sparkles 7183572


my type 2 sugar medication has zapped my body of testosterone, which zaps my sex drive. he needs to see a doctor or start working out. the problem doesn't necessarily have to be you. when my t is low i don't really give a crap about sex unless a tit falls out right in front of me while i'm doing something else. hint hint..lol..
284dan

User ID: 9107938
United States
11/04/2012 08:39 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
My wife wants to start an open relationship. I work away in the mines week on week off. and in her 30's she has a huge sex drive. it is driving her mad and she wants a fubu for the week I am at work. but she is also ok with me getting one at work too. I dont know if I should be happy or sad. we have been together for 12 years and have 3 kids. we are soul mates and madly in love. I should be ok with my wife wanting other sexual experiences if it means I get too as well.. right???

She is a big slut that has held her self in check all these years. should I just let her go on my week at work and fuck and suck cock? and I can find a fubu at work to fuck every night in my room. then on our week together we were thinking of dabbling in couple swapping too cause it seems pretty hot. the thought of he fucking other people does and doesnt scare me at the same time. its a strange feeling. if we could both get over these insecurities and realize our love for each other wont change no matter who we sleep with. sex is sex and our love for each other grows stronger every day. but she is in her prime and just gets these mad urges constantly to want to be filled by cock. she just wants release by being a slut. am I being selfish by wanting her to remain faithful?? or am I better accepting her slutty ways and finding it a huge turn on and take advantage of this chance to also become a man slut? as I also havent had many people as we got together in highschool. any help is appreciated. I am really torn. I could go either way. There is fear. but its fear of the unknown. maybe once it happens and we are out there fucking around it will all work out and the start of our new relationship with each other can begin. it could be a really wild and open relationship that actually gets stronger as we grow as individuals and a couple together.

What do you guys think..

sorry for hijacking. it seemed like we r kinda in the same boat.
If you hubby has a low sex drive maybe he would be ok with sharing you because he understands you are a horny slut that loves cock. Its animalistic and exiting to want different people. and its only sex. I know she wont fall in love and run away. I never fear that. its the jealousy I need to get over that she is getting sexual enjoyment from others.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


I know a couple who got into swapping. After a while, turns out her husband and the wife of the couple they were swapping with started meeting without their spouses. when it was found out, 2 divorces happened. I guess when all 4 were in the room fucking it was ok but when the two of them were left out, it was an issue.

And bad news. If your wife is now asking you if she can screw other guys, she's already done it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26880926
United States
11/04/2012 08:39 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
He's just not that into you. He married you to be "have that marriage thing handled."

Sorry to be the one to break it to you.

People are too eager to get married and this is usually the result.
284dan

User ID: 9107938
United States
11/04/2012 08:41 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Two things:


PORNOGRAPHY AND YOUR WEIGHT.

You are no longer the attractive woman who had nice outfits and great figure. You resorted to food to hide your depression so I am sure you are 20 to 40 pounds overweight. NO MAN LIKES A FAT CHICK. Why do you think they go to strip clubs? To see fat chicks? No way....

The solution:

Lose weight and engage on sport activities. A gym, running club, go to wine tastings with him. Have more sex regularly and dress sexier. He will lose interest for porn and change his focus to you.

I know this formula will work for most unhappy overweight American chicks who wonder why their boyfriends or husbands are not paying attention to them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 2990625


no true. thick thighs, big butt, wide hips, flat tummy, big breasts = yum.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 25390958
United States
11/04/2012 08:41 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
dunno, I could go 3 times a day with just a little bit of proper encouragment, and I'm old.
ll
User ID: 24392356
Lithuania
11/04/2012 08:42 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
speak to him directly?

better ask him. be honest. truth begets truth.

sex may become boring if you want to do it every single day.... it exhausts men a lot.
284dan

User ID: 9107938
United States
11/04/2012 08:42 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Just trying to understand my husbands sex drive. Is it normal that my sex drive is higher than his? What should I do?
 Quoting: Sparkles 7183572


Be sexy. Try losing 100 lbs. Stop acting masculine. Oh, and if you insisted that he be in the delivery room when you gave birth, he's probably still traumatized from seeing what no man should ever see.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26967861


100% true. A buddy of mine told me years ago this will cause more failed marriages than anything else and he is right. My sex life died after seeing that shit.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1103915
United States
11/04/2012 08:44 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Stress, Low testosterone/ high cortisol levels, aging, Low activity levels; in that order.

Either that or he no longer finds you appealing sexually.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1634456
Australia
11/04/2012 08:44 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
My wife wants to start an open relationship. I work away in the mines week on week off. and in her 30's she has a huge sex drive. it is driving her mad and she wants a fubu for the week I am at work. but she is also ok with me getting one at work too. I dont know if I should be happy or sad. we have been together for 12 years and have 3 kids. we are soul mates and madly in love. I should be ok with my wife wanting other sexual experiences if it means I get too as well.. right???

She is a big slut that has held her self in check all these years. should I just let her go on my week at work and fuck and suck cock? and I can find a fubu at work to fuck every night in my room. then on our week together we were thinking of dabbling in couple swapping too cause it seems pretty hot. the thought of he fucking other people does and doesnt scare me at the same time. its a strange feeling. if we could both get over these insecurities and realize our love for each other wont change no matter who we sleep with. sex is sex and our love for each other grows stronger every day. but she is in her prime and just gets these mad urges constantly to want to be filled by cock. she just wants release by being a slut. am I being selfish by wanting her to remain faithful?? or am I better accepting her slutty ways and finding it a huge turn on and take advantage of this chance to also become a man slut? as I also havent had many people as we got together in highschool. any help is appreciated. I am really torn. I could go either way. There is fear. but its fear of the unknown. maybe once it happens and we are out there fucking around it will all work out and the start of our new relationship with each other can begin. it could be a really wild and open relationship that actually gets stronger as we grow as individuals and a couple together.

What do you guys think..

sorry for hijacking. it seemed like we r kinda in the same boat.
If you hubby has a low sex drive maybe he would be ok with sharing you because he understands you are a horny slut that loves cock. Its animalistic and exiting to want different people. and its only sex. I know she wont fall in love and run away. I never fear that. its the jealousy I need to get over that she is getting sexual enjoyment from others.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


I know a couple who got into swapping. After a while, turns out her husband and the wife of the couple they were swapping with started meeting without their spouses. when it was found out, 2 divorces happened. I guess when all 4 were in the room fucking it was ok but when the two of them were left out, it was an issue.

And bad news. If your wife is now asking you if she can screw other guys, she's already done it.
 Quoting: 284dan


We have been very honest about this topic. All our cheating baggage has been aired alredy. we both have cheating in the past. and we both agreed that with couples we would never see them singly. that is wrong to each other. think of her as a hippie. free love and all that. we honestly have never been more in love with each other. and I know her well. she isnt lying. she is being patient and really trying to help me understand her need for just sex. a cock to stuff in her pussy to ride. I can understand her point of view. I would love a pussy on the side for a different sexual gratification. we make make love everytime. we dont argue. everything could be better. If we can accept rules and boundaries we could enjoy a new level of sex and also have the best soul mate relationship we can. she does already have someone she has been texting that could be a fubu easily. but she is respecting me and has stopped texting and wont see him unless I am for it. but I dont have anybody right now. she wants me to get someone now so we can start our fubu's together. so it would be for the week I am at work. at home we r together or swapping together. could this option be doable??
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 23406708
United States
11/04/2012 08:45 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Some people on this site are really mean...

We had the same problem...My husband went to the doctor and he had low testosterone. He rubs this gel on his neck twice a day...

Wow - it makes a HUGE difference...

I don't think it's just age/stress....I think the environment is de-masculinizing men...(just my opinion)

Just saw the posts above - Open relationship?

My first thought would be no...My second thought would be hell no...

NO NO NO (Sorry just my opinion)
Mr. D
User ID: 4603964
United States
11/04/2012 08:45 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
I haven't had sex since my ex-wife divorced me. Mind you it isn't because I don't want to have sex, I just can't seem to find a girlfriend because I am unemployed. I have spoken to a few women, gave them my number and email address however many women here in Texas seem to be so controlled, shallow and superficial it really is a sad state of affairs.

Oh and one more thing, I'm not into virtual relationships, only a real women will do. (Not that fake sexting, webcam bullshit). I have tried to get a job however because I am half Latino, most place won't hire an E-tech with almost 10 years of International experience that looks Mexican.

I call it Pyscho-babble warfare of the sexes. Jealous sick people if you ask me.
Evil_Twin

User ID: 23761243
United States
11/04/2012 08:46 PM

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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Geeze, I dunno.

I'm 43, and the only thing that kills my sex drive is flamethrowers.
Hellbilly
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 15396218
United States
11/04/2012 08:46 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Most married men will decline the opportunity to have sex with their wives when they are upset with/mad at/feel let down by their wives.

And the husband feels that he has no voice in explaining to you what he is at odds with-stemming from you-,that he's been down this road before with you and either you did not get the hint, or you blew up and made the problem he's experiencing with you "his" problem or "his" fault or villenized him for exposing to you that there is an issue that is in your court to deal with in a way he feels expresses your value for him.

Get it?

He may feel like he can't tell you.
The drama that could ensue may not be worth the risk of being honest and explaining his feelings.

It's probably an underlying issue you've both had to deal with befor, and I'd bet it ended poorly for him.

I'm not trying to be mean and I do truly hope this helps.

Men crave visual stemulation , work the angle and I'm sure you'll get what your after.

:)
284dan

User ID: 9107938
United States
11/04/2012 08:46 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
My wife wants to start an open relationship. I work away in the mines week on week off. and in her 30's she has a huge sex drive. it is driving her mad and she wants a fubu for the week I am at work. but she is also ok with me getting one at work too. I dont know if I should be happy or sad. we have been together for 12 years and have 3 kids. we are soul mates and madly in love. I should be ok with my wife wanting other sexual experiences if it means I get too as well.. right???

She is a big slut that has held her self in check all these years. should I just let her go on my week at work and fuck and suck cock? and I can find a fubu at work to fuck every night in my room. then on our week together we were thinking of dabbling in couple swapping too cause it seems pretty hot. the thought of he fucking other people does and doesnt scare me at the same time. its a strange feeling. if we could both get over these insecurities and realize our love for each other wont change no matter who we sleep with. sex is sex and our love for each other grows stronger every day. but she is in her prime and just gets these mad urges constantly to want to be filled by cock. she just wants release by being a slut. am I being selfish by wanting her to remain faithful?? or am I better accepting her slutty ways and finding it a huge turn on and take advantage of this chance to also become a man slut? as I also havent had many people as we got together in highschool. any help is appreciated. I am really torn. I could go either way. There is fear. but its fear of the unknown. maybe once it happens and we are out there fucking around it will all work out and the start of our new relationship with each other can begin. it could be a really wild and open relationship that actually gets stronger as we grow as individuals and a couple together.

What do you guys think..

sorry for hijacking. it seemed like we r kinda in the same boat.
If you hubby has a low sex drive maybe he would be ok with sharing you because he understands you are a horny slut that loves cock. Its animalistic and exiting to want different people. and its only sex. I know she wont fall in love and run away. I never fear that. its the jealousy I need to get over that she is getting sexual enjoyment from others.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


I know a couple who got into swapping. After a while, turns out her husband and the wife of the couple they were swapping with started meeting without their spouses. when it was found out, 2 divorces happened. I guess when all 4 were in the room fucking it was ok but when the two of them were left out, it was an issue.

And bad news. If your wife is now asking you if she can screw other guys, she's already done it.
 Quoting: 284dan


We have been very honest about this topic. All our cheating baggage has been aired alredy. we both have cheating in the past. and we both agreed that with couples we would never see them singly. that is wrong to each other. think of her as a hippie. free love and all that. we honestly have never been more in love with each other. and I know her well. she isnt lying. she is being patient and really trying to help me understand her need for just sex. a cock to stuff in her pussy to ride. I can understand her point of view. I would love a pussy on the side for a different sexual gratification. we make make love everytime. we dont argue. everything could be better. If we can accept rules and boundaries we could enjoy a new level of sex and also have the best soul mate relationship we can. she does already have someone she has been texting that could be a fubu easily. but she is respecting me and has stopped texting and wont see him unless I am for it. but I dont have anybody right now. she wants me to get someone now so we can start our fubu's together. so it would be for the week I am at work. at home we r together or swapping together. could this option be doable??
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


Not doable. If she develops feelings for someone else that you are swapping with or that she is seeing on your "off week" the marriage will be over. If you have kids, it will be bad for them.

Buy her a vibrator.
284dan

User ID: 9107938
United States
11/04/2012 08:47 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Some people on this site are really mean...

We had the same problem...My husband went to the doctor and he had low testosterone. He rubs this gel on his neck twice a day...

Wow - it makes a HUGE difference...

I don't think it's just age/stress....I think the environment is de-masculinizing men...(just my opinion)
 Quoting: DarbyDoom


this
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26768633
United States
11/04/2012 08:48 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Just trying to understand my husbands sex drive. Is it normal that my sex drive is higher than his? What should I do?
 Quoting: Sparkles 7183572


there are many reasons for this.

one of them..which likely doesn't apply to you is...

that the majority of women these days seek control . It is as if they feel inadequate because they do not have a penis.

this type of mentality in a woman turns many men 'off'.

no real man wants a woman that wishes she were male. ...although today....most men are not masculine anymore...and those types want a woman with a penis...lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 18254922


Is this retard for real^ that is one of the more hilarious things ive read ever!
"What real men want... and all .. women these days and their penis envy"
They are either a severely confused homosexual stuck in a deep dark closet or theyre getting their dating tips from one of those mens groups who try to "figure out" the female mind in order to get laid more or just laid at all.

nonetheless if OP is still reading dont listen to this rhetoric. it will get you nothing but a sex complex. Sex is not black and white . talk to your husband not GLP. see what he is thinking. if he loves you and wants to make the marriage work he will work with you. create games ,roll playing, Im convinced that 90% of sex is in the mind or better put imagination.and if that doesnt work go to couples sex therapy.
Im one of those "sensitive" guys that the above poster is so scared of . Ive got a great sex life and have no problem being dominate or submissive.switching it up is fun. toys are also good.
Manu-Koelbren

User ID: 1312616
Spain
11/04/2012 08:48 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
My wife wants to start an open relationship. I work away in the mines week on week off. and in her 30's she has a huge sex drive. it is driving her mad and she wants a fubu for the week I am at work. but she is also ok with me getting one at work too. I dont know if I should be happy or sad. we have been together for 12 years and have 3 kids. we are soul mates and madly in love. I should be ok with my wife wanting other sexual experiences if it means I get too as well.. right???

She is a big slut that has held her self in check all these years. should I just let her go on my week at work and fuck and suck cock? and I can find a fubu at work to fuck every night in my room. then on our week together we were thinking of dabbling in couple swapping too cause it seems pretty hot. the thought of he fucking other people does and doesnt scare me at the same time. its a strange feeling. if we could both get over these insecurities and realize our love for each other wont change no matter who we sleep with. sex is sex and our love for each other grows stronger every day. but she is in her prime and just gets these mad urges constantly to want to be filled by cock. she just wants release by being a slut. am I being selfish by wanting her to remain faithful?? or am I better accepting her slutty ways and finding it a huge turn on and take advantage of this chance to also become a man slut? as I also havent had many people as we got together in highschool. any help is appreciated. I am really torn. I could go either way. There is fear. but its fear of the unknown. maybe once it happens and we are out there fucking around it will all work out and the start of our new relationship with each other can begin. it could be a really wild and open relationship that actually gets stronger as we grow as individuals and a couple together.

What do you guys think..

sorry for hijacking. it seemed like we r kinda in the same boat.
If you hubby has a low sex drive maybe he would be ok with sharing you because he understands you are a horny slut that loves cock. Its animalistic and exiting to want different people. and its only sex. I know she wont fall in love and run away. I never fear that. its the jealousy I need to get over that she is getting sexual enjoyment from others.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


I know a couple who got into swapping. After a while, turns out her husband and the wife of the couple they were swapping with started meeting without their spouses. when it was found out, 2 divorces happened. I guess when all 4 were in the room fucking it was ok but when the two of them were left out, it was an issue.

And bad news. If your wife is now asking you if she can screw other guys, she's already done it.
 Quoting: 284dan


We have been very honest about this topic. All our cheating baggage has been aired alredy. we both have cheating in the past. and we both agreed that with couples we would never see them singly. that is wrong to each other. think of her as a hippie. free love and all that. we honestly have never been more in love with each other. and I know her well. she isnt lying. she is being patient and really trying to help me understand her need for just sex. a cock to stuff in her pussy to ride. I can understand her point of view. I would love a pussy on the side for a different sexual gratification. we make make love everytime. we dont argue. everything could be better. If we can accept rules and boundaries we could enjoy a new level of sex and also have the best soul mate relationship we can. she does already have someone she has been texting that could be a fubu easily. but she is respecting me and has stopped texting and wont see him unless I am for it. but I dont have anybody right now. she wants me to get someone now so we can start our fubu's together. so it would be for the week I am at work. at home we r together or swapping together. could this option be doable??
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456



rofl dude you're a loser, she will find a better cock and dump your ass.Talk about free love and shit, well that is just not compatible with a relationship, you can't have the cake and eat it unfortunately .
"White privilege" is the liberal religion's version of Original Sin: you are born guilty, and you carry that burden of guilt all your life, and the only way to escape eternal damnation is for white people confess their sin, to bow, kneel and believe the dogma of the Church of Liberalism, genuflect at its altars, honor its saints, fill the collection plate, and never, ever doubt.

-- Dixon Diaz
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1103915
United States
11/04/2012 08:50 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Stress, Low testosterone/ high cortisol levels, aging, Low activity levels; in that order.

Either that or he no longer finds you appealing sexually.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1103915


oddly enough the stress can be reduced by having sex,
the low testosterone / high cortisol can be reversed by being more active - regardless of age. the increase in activity level is most easily a funtion of wanting to please a woman he is attracted to physically. ( hw many times have you seen a blubber gut guy lose the weight and get fit after a divorce?) The hunt for new poon is a great motivator to get off the couch and into the gym.

so it's back to you sister - spice it up! Make sure you are the hottest thing he will see every day and he can't wait to come home to you - and into you!
Anonymous Coward
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11/04/2012 08:50 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
My wife wants to start an open relationship. I work away in the mines week on week off. and in her 30's she has a huge sex drive. it is driving her mad and she wants a fubu for the week I am at work. but she is also ok with me getting one at work too. I dont know if I should be happy or sad. we have been together for 12 years and have 3 kids. we are soul mates and madly in love. I should be ok with my wife wanting other sexual experiences if it means I get too as well.. right???

She is a big slut that has held her self in check all these years. should I just let her go on my week at work and fuck and suck cock? and I can find a fubu at work to fuck every night in my room. then on our week together we were thinking of dabbling in couple swapping too cause it seems pretty hot. the thought of he fucking other people does and doesnt scare me at the same time. its a strange feeling. if we could both get over these insecurities and realize our love for each other wont change no matter who we sleep with. sex is sex and our love for each other grows stronger every day. but she is in her prime and just gets these mad urges constantly to want to be filled by cock. she just wants release by being a slut. am I being selfish by wanting her to remain faithful?? or am I better accepting her slutty ways and finding it a huge turn on and take advantage of this chance to also become a man slut? as I also havent had many people as we got together in highschool. any help is appreciated. I am really torn. I could go either way. There is fear. but its fear of the unknown. maybe once it happens and we are out there fucking around it will all work out and the start of our new relationship with each other can begin. it could be a really wild and open relationship that actually gets stronger as we grow as individuals and a couple together.

What do you guys think..

sorry for hijacking. it seemed like we r kinda in the same boat.
If you hubby has a low sex drive maybe he would be ok with sharing you because he understands you are a horny slut that loves cock. Its animalistic and exiting to want different people. and its only sex. I know she wont fall in love and run away. I never fear that. its the jealousy I need to get over that she is getting sexual enjoyment from others.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1634456


buddy in my opinion you need to stop trying to convince yourself this is ok. your intimacy is the only thing that only you can have. men can look and lust but, for now, you are the one that get to have her. once that is gone you cant get it back. nothing worth having is easy so i dont buy the animal instinct bs. we arent animals. we can form thought and be loyal.

i would find a job that doesnt take me away and take care of my wife. i would say you already need some work just because she would even entertain the idea. you have a right to be upset about this. you married and made a vow to each other. you have a right to be pissed that she doesnt want to keep it now. sex is the only that belongs to just the two of you. man keep it that way.

i am speaking from experience from my last marriage. you will regret it. people that swing put a happy face on it but there is something so evil about it. if u do it you will feel your heart drop. this is me anyway.
MarkinAZ

User ID: 20006444
United States
11/04/2012 08:50 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Anything can take his sex drives down the tubes: from blood pressure medication to a bitchy wife that he's deeply angry at. If the husband is holding a major resentment toward you - frankly he may be preferring to masturbate than to have sex with you until his feelings and emotions (that he may not even be aware of) are resolved.

Also, guilt will and often does, do it. If a guy has been cheating on a "good" wife and comes home looks at her, the kids, the home she made for him, etc., it can make him feel that he's a total piece of shit for what he's been doing out side the marriage. When this happens, he may be impotent with you until he talks about it, and that probably means therapy not talking it out with you. (Doing that - telling you the wife - would be too cruel to imagine. Sometimes ignorance is bliss. And confession - while it maybe good for the soul and the psyche - can be hell on a marriage. Some things are better left unsaid and unconfessed to the 'innocent' spouse.

If he's in his 50's and smoking or overweight, that can do it as well. Blood flow gets slower, and arterial pathways get blocked. If he's diabetic, look out! Many guys on Insulin are all but impotent.

Talk to him and see if there is a medical problem brewing (and get him to a doc if he's talking about frequent pounding headaches, or feeling cold for no reason - both signs of BP Problems). But be warned, most of the time it's not a physical thing. Usually it's some deeply held anger at your or at himself.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 23559912
United States
11/04/2012 08:50 PM
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Re: What makes men not want to have sex?
Im telling you its porn. After watching some hot tight bodied young girl get railed in the arse repeatedly he doesnt want the shitty in the dark misionary position you are giving him.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7191548


^^^^ THIS ^^^^

trust me. I'm the husband in the same boat. At this point it is just work. Same old same old. I literally get nothing out of it cause it is just the same old boring shit.

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