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The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 2338
United States
01/31/2006 03:35 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
Translation??

What the ?? is this about? How about you sum it all up for us in one short paragraph and stop with the nonsense??
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68516
India
01/31/2006 03:58 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
It was then that the semper fi officer ripped off his face mask and wig and revealed himself as ... Dick Cheney

"Fuck you", he said.

"And fuck your ideals and values", he jested.

"And yo momma", he wise-cracked.

We fell about (in ag) laughing
man_49 (OP)

User ID: 68959
United States
02/01/2006 09:37 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
THE FIRST ANTIGRAVITY SPACEFLIGHT

We decided to try a spaceflight with our pizza crust shaped craft, without an enclosed pressure vessel. We had noticed that air within the antigravity field was not disturbed during high speed flight, and in fact the ship's field could float upon a lake without allowing the water to penetrate.

They put a nylon plastic bag on MMM's head, wrapped him in saran wrap, and put an oxygen breather terminal in his mouth, with an oxygen tank attached.

He was sitting in the ship, looking funny. And feeling funny I imagine.

I said, "You have a GPS?"

"Yes, I have a GPS."

"Turn on the lights," Brian said.

"Great." He began to reach. "I'd like to turn them on, but I don't know how to."

Brian said: "You have to turn them on here." He reached for the normal switches on the lamps themselves.

"Oops," MMM said. "OK, ready to go."

He punched a control, and there was a pop as the light ship went instantly supersonic and vanished into the skies.

I am totally telepathic, so is MMM and all our engineers are too. We gave them each 6 pounds of white powder of gold. They are all angels. Angels are people with extreme talents.

SARAEL'S STORY

I asked Sarael if I could tell her story. She said: "Go ahead, nobody believes it anyway."

Our engineering manager is the archangel Sarael. Enoch wrote 5500 years ago that she was the archangel who watches over the spiritual purity of humanity.

Sarael is 695,000 years old. I know several other angels who are able to verify this, including one who is 635,000 and one who is 1.5 million years.

She has multiple college degrees: medicine, literature, history and her last degree was in computer science. Her mind is easily sharper than any of the engineers.

She's also pretty, petite, nice, funny and exotic looking with an unusally severe face, and a very very long neck. Her hair is black, straight and hangs down to her ass. Her nails are short, because she works for a living.

Among her many life events:

She was silent film star in Russia.
She survived the bubonic plague in France, twice.
She met a lion once and survived the meeting. She said: "I stopped being afraid of anything then."
She was a horse track manager. "NO, I designed the track and made it a success" she says.
"I was a courtesean for Alexander the great," she says.
She met and knew all the great Bible characters: Melchezedek, Abraham, Sarah, Jacob, Moses, David, Solomon, Jesus...

"...and I could go on and on and on and on and on and on ..." she says.

"Lord, Why waste the time" she says.

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man_49 (OP)

User ID: 68959
United States
02/01/2006 10:13 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
MMM IN SPACE

"Mike, where are you" I said.

"I'm in space. The earth is behind me, a little ball and it looks about the size of my two hands side by side."

"The space suit is working OK?" I asked.

"Impossible, but I think it really isn't necessary."

"This control panel is in the wrong place. I want it in between my legs."

"I think it is psychologically possible to get used to it in its current position."

"If you don't mind I'd like to move it."

"Go ahead and try. If you lift it up I think it will slide off its mounting."

"Yeah, that worked. This is better." He tapped on the panel, and raised it on his legs.

"I want to rotate the ship around."

"There's a control for that. Look for a Z-spin label."

"I see it," Mike said.

"Emergency. It does not work."

"Oops. This always happens on test flights. Turn the panel over and look inside for the problem."

He did so. He said: "It looks like the multifunction board is flopping around inside the box."

"Push it up against the underside of the panel surface," I said. "We should have encapsulated the control panel in polyester resin once it was working."

"OK, now it is working."

"Come back right away. And aim slightly to one side of the earth, so you don't collide with it."

"OK. I am coming back."

A few seconds passed.

"I am basically in the atmosphere now, and looking at the GPS." Mike said. " Marvelous. It's much faster than I expected."

The flight was a success and nobody was hurt. Everybody's confidence was raised up a degree.

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boinker
User ID: 68959
United States
02/01/2006 11:15 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
boing!

This sounds genuine.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 185
United States
02/02/2006 02:33 AM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
The magnet checks out:

[link to www.neotexx.com]

The phasing makes sense.

The story reads like a silly novel.
man_49
User ID: 69075
United States
02/02/2006 08:11 AM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
Nice link, thanks!
man_49
User ID: 69110
United States
02/02/2006 11:00 AM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
self boinking!!!

Does that make me queer?
ID2268

User ID: 2268
United Kingdom
02/02/2006 11:43 AM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
the way this poster writes is interesting, either he is writing about events that have actually happened, or is very talented in putting in past perspective.

which are you OP?

i would like to think this is the truth as nothing you say supprises me, infact it kinda reasures what i already know...

ORME, Antigravity, Angels.

Very interesting, would like to know much more.
man_49
User ID: 69179
United States
02/02/2006 02:44 PM
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Re: The experience of working at Antigravity United, I said it is the real story
Everything is true and real.

I had to modify a few events for reasons of making the story more compact.

I will keep writing more chapters as they happen.

Thanks ID2268.

Love, peace, Light
man_49

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