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2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1246336
United States
11/19/2012 12:58 AM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was asalted.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1246336
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11/19/2012 01:02 AM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days". Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely! This must be a sign from God!"
The woman continued, "and look at this, there's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune. Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..."
MORAL OF THE STORY: Women are clever, evil bitches
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1246336
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11/19/2012 01:03 AM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
when i die, i want to go like my grandfather.

peacefully, quietly, in bed.

not like the passengers in his car, all screaming and crying
 Quoting: david 16910407


rofl
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1246336
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11/19/2012 01:06 AM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
please forgive me for this one....

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat's milk.

The older of the two pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. They start reminiscing.

'This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would have been 24 years old now.'

'Yes, I remember him as a baby,' says the other mother cheerfully.

'He's a martyr now though,' mum confides.

'Oh, so sad dear,' says the other.

And this is my second son Kalid. He would have been 21.

'Oh, I remember him,' says the other happily, he had such curly hair when he was born'.

'He's a martyr too,' says mum quietly.

'Oh, gracious me,' says the other.

'And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would have been 18,' she whispers.

'Yes,' says the friend enthusiastically, 'I remember when he first started school.'

'He's a martyr also,' says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says...

'They blow up so fast, don't they?
david
User ID: 16910407
United States
11/19/2012 01:36 AM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
please forgive me for this one....

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat's milk.

The older of the two pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. They start reminiscing.

'This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would have been 24 years old now.'

'Yes, I remember him as a baby,' says the other mother cheerfully.

'He's a martyr now though,' mum confides.

'Oh, so sad dear,' says the other.

And this is my second son Kalid. He would have been 21.

'Oh, I remember him,' says the other happily, he had such curly hair when he was born'.

'He's a martyr too,' says mum quietly.

'Oh, gracious me,' says the other.

'And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would have been 18,' she whispers.

'Yes,' says the friend enthusiastically, 'I remember when he first started school.'

'He's a martyr also,' says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says...

'They blow up so fast, don't they?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1246336



the following dark humor- courtesy of Stephen King...

why did the dead baby cross the road?

because it was stapled to the chicken
blackngoldbeauty

User ID: 28390977
United States
11/24/2012 02:35 PM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:

Air in the hands
Mother Stickers!
This is a Fuck up!
 Quoting: Unit3


Funny how?

Dyslexics have problems with visual cues not an inability to reproduce visual errors as sloemn errors.

Don't give up your day job.

Humor often reveals our conceptions—and misconceptions—of the world, and few psychological conditions are the butt of as many jokes as dyslexia: "I'm an agnostic dyslexic with insomnia. I lay awake all night trying to work out if there really is a Dog." Or: "Dyslexics of the world, untie!"

Yet to people with dyslexia, these jokes aren't especially funny. Not only do they poke fun at people with a serious disability, they also reinforce inaccurate stereotypes of people with a genuine psychological condition and underscore just how distant the public's conception of dyslexia is from reality.


[link to www.psychologicalscience.org]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27222563

Oh! Lighten up!! I'm blonde and I like blonde jokes...if you can't have a sense of humor in this world about life's problems and strifes...well...you live in a dark world. My son is Autistic...sometimes I need to laugh to keep my sanity.hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28345474
United Kingdom
11/24/2012 02:49 PM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
Just as well they didn't have tourettes, were they arrested then?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 44110959
United States
08/26/2014 06:57 PM
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Re: 2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:
2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:

Air in the hands
Mother Stickers!
This is a Fuck up!
 Quoting: Unit3


Funny how?

Dyslexics have problems with visual cues not an inability to reproduce visual errors as sloemn errors.

Don't give up your day job.

Humor often reveals our conceptions—and misconceptions—of the world, and few psychological conditions are the butt of as many jokes as dyslexia: "I'm an agnostic dyslexic with insomnia. I lay awake all night trying to work out if there really is a Dog." Or: "Dyslexics of the world, untie!"

Yet to people with dyslexia, these jokes aren't especially funny. Not only do they poke fun at people with a serious disability, they also reinforce inaccurate stereotypes of people with a genuine psychological condition and underscore just how distant the public's conception of dyslexia is from reality.


[link to www.psychologicalscience.org]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27222563


That is a remarkably sad comment. I am a TBI brain damaged rapid cycling manic depressive, and I think that is funny beyond belief.

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